# Do you say thank you for replies you get?



## Cracker Jack

Something just crossed my mind. Whenever I start a thread, that's because I want to learn. If I get replies, I make it a point to say thank you to all who have responded. I have noticed that there are thread starters who don't bother to do so. There are those who posted but are no longer around at a later date.  However, some ''ungrateful ones'' are still on the forum after their act of ''ingratitude.''

I asked this because I want to know if in your culture, it is a must to say thank you. In mine, it is. As a person, that is the least I can do to show my gratitude to those who replied who are, by the way under no obligation to respond.

I would like to hear from you about this. Also if there is a someone who had been ''ungrateful'' and posts again, would you still be willing to help him? Thanks a lot.


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## Random1

> I asked this because I want to know if in your culture, it is a must to say thank you. In mine, it is. As a person, that is the least I can do to show my gratitude to those who replied who are, by the way under no obligation to respond.


Here [NY,USA] it is not a 'must' to say thank you, but you will come off as a jerk and most people won't be nice to you if it happens a lot.



> I would like to hear from you about this. Also if there is a someone who had been ''ungrateful'' and posts again, would you still be willing to help him? Thanks a lot.


I usually don't notice if a person doesn't respond, but I do take notice when they do say "Thank You!"  I would not reply just because of the person.


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## xarruc

If I post a thread saying can you help me here, or how do you say that then it is appropriate to thank them. The cultural forum I would say was different because it is open ended.

Also if you say thankyou and somone adds a comment later then maybe I wont, because it would just be too much.


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## Shlama_98

xarruc said:


> If I post a thread saying can you help me here, or how do you say that then it is appropriate to thank them. The cultural forum I would say was different because it is open ended.
> 
> Also if you say thankyou and somone adds a comment later then maybe I wont, because it would just be too much.



I agree with this opinion, if you ask for help then saying thank you would be the appropriate thing to do, but if you start a thread for the sake of having a discussion then I don't see why you would say thank you, unless someone compliments you or helps you in some way.


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## Siberia

Hi, 
I tend to be one of the ones that doesn't say thank you after. I normally start a thread, ask for help and thank in advance so that I don't fillup the thread too much with thankyous everytime a different person makes a suggestion. Of course I am grateful to all the suggestions and corrections people may make. I am learning as well as getting information I need. Too many thankyous make the threads so long to read especially when you are looking something up in the WR dicitionary and you go to the suggestions at the bottom linking to the forums.


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## mytwolangs

If I gain something good out of a thread, i will normally say thanks. 
Hey why not? It encourages people to bring other good things to share. 

If someone doesn't tell me thank you, I normally don't even notice.


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## _forumuser_

I can't think of any reasons for not saying thank you (most of the times!) except carelessness or disregard for others.


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## caballoschica

Siberia said:


> Hi,
> I tend to be one of the ones that doesn't say thank you after. I normally start a thread, ask for help and thank in advance so that I don't fillup the thread too much with thankyous everytime a different person makes a suggestion. Of course I am grateful to all the suggestions and corrections people may make. I am learning as well as getting information I need. Too many thankyous make the threads so long to read especially when you are looking something up in the WR dicitionary and you go to the suggestions at the bottom linking to the forums.



I completely agree. I'll thank in advance, but not say thank you after every response I get.  I might if I have some comment or question after I get responses that can go on the same post, that way I am not using so much space for two words, as meaningful as they are.  Off-line, I would definitely say thanks! after I get a response to a question I had.  I try and be as polite as possible


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## Genecks

I show my gratitude by helping the Spanish persons with English. They help me with Spanish. Sometimes I thank them, and sometimes I don't. I'm not a person for using words such as "sorry," "thank you," and other such phrases.

Those words are empty to me. And actions speak louder than words. Someone once told me to never tell her sorry. She simply told me not to do the same action again. Not doing the same action is worth more than a sorry.

Also, you don't have to help others who don't say thank you. You can feed your unjustified superego if you like. Some people don't want to help because they believe there is too much competition in the world. If that's what justifies you're reasoning, go for it.

I think reciprocity is better than some stupid sayings.

I've been on the Internet since 1994. Sure, some people like to be polite. However, I've been on many forums throughout 12 years. I've noticed that many people say, "thank you." Afterwards, they create a new account and ask a different question. It's a way of abusing the forum and members of the forum. I've stopped using a lot of forums because people kept abusing the knowledge offered. I stopped going to  [Moderator note: forum name deleted.  Please do not use WordReference to conduct  personal campaings against other sites.  That is a direct violation of our forum rules. ]because of people asking one question, leaving, and never contributing to the forum.

Before you start judging members, question if they ever contribute to the forum.


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## danielfranco

I am an ingrate.

Thank you very much.


P.S.
Okay, also I'm a cheeky monkey. So let me elaborate: I used to post unending thank-you's and various other pleasantries, but then I meditated upon the fact that I am not at all like that in real life. In real life, I am a boor that walks around oblivious to many social conventions. So I'm on a quest to be closer to the real-me than to the pretend-me in this virtual community.
I'm sure I was the _*only*_ person here lying through my teeth about the real-me, no?


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## .   1

I have avoided thanks unless I contribute with the thanks.  Most of my questions are on the cultural Forum and generally do not have a definitive answer.  I am loath to say thanks in English Only on the assumption that there may be an additional answer.

Robert


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## Etcetera

Cracker Jack said:


> Also if there is a someone who had been ''ungrateful'' and posts again, would you still be willing to help him? Thanks a lot.


I'm not sure I'll remember the name of such an "ungrateful" poster.
And besides, a question asked is in most cases worth answering, because it might be helpful for other learners. 

St. Petersburg is famous for the politeness of its inhabitants. In Moscow the situation is rather different (I almost start when I hear from someone there "Please" or "Thank you"). But most parents I know teach their children to use polite words. 
When I ask a question in the English Only forum, I always say "Thank you in advance". However, when I get a reply, I usually thank the poster. Or the posters. There can't be too many "thankyous", I believe.


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## Victoria32

Cracker Jack said:


> Something just crossed my mind. Whenever I start a thread, that's because I want to learn. If I get replies, I make it a point to say thank you to all who have responded. I have noticed that there are thread starters who don't bother to do so. There are those who posted but are no longer around at a later date.  However, some ''ungrateful ones'' are still on the forum after their act of ''ingratitude.''
> 
> I asked this because I want to know if in your culture, it is a must to say thank you. In mine, it is. As a person, that is the least I can do to show my gratitude to those who replied who are, by the way under no obligation to respond.
> 
> I would like to hear from you about this. Also if there is a someone who had been ''ungrateful'' and posts again, would you still be willing to help him? Thanks a lot.


I ask a lot for help on IT/EN and usually I thank people individually, because each answer adds something  fresh.. and some people have gone out of their way to be especially helpful!

I don't generally notice whether people say thank you to me or not... I wouldn't particularly remember anyone who didn't.  I answer a lot on English only because  I like doing it, and some people there ask really interesting questions, so it is a real pleasure reading their contributions.

On Cultural of course, everything is different, it's a different style of thing.
VL


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## roxcyn

I try to say thank you or I put "thank you beforehand".   Cracker Jack, sometimes I don't have time to go back to every thread, however that is why I put thank you before hand because I appreciate all the help I can get


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## TimeHP

I 'thank-you-very-much' in linguistic fora. Not a lot in cultural discussion.
Anyway, thank you for your  question...


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## zebedee

On a related topic, you might find this thread interesting.


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## maxiogee

I generally thank people on the thread, but sometimes I send PMs instead.


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## natasha2000

I always say thank you when I ask something in language forums. I also do not say thank you after each and every answer, but wait until I have what I have asked completely clear (maybe I ask some questions more, make some discussion about it) and then thank to eveyone who participated. I find it polite and necessary. 

I also answered to some questions and didn't get thank you, but depending on the time I spent in answering I get upset or not. If for expample the question is: How do you say in Spanish "I am fed up with you". The answer is very simple: Estoy harto de ti. I spent half of the minute to answer and I even forget it in few minutes. But if the question made me to make some research in internet or inmy books, something more complicated... Or I write half page explaining in detail something, and then don't get not even just a simple thanks, I get upset and for sure I remember that person and although I cannot guarantee, I am almost sure that I would not answer again to any of his/her future questions.
Unfortunately, I find in Slavic forums many examples like this one, asking for translations from or to Serbian/Croatian/Bosnian etc.. I also can assume that those people are only passing by, but I think that one thanks wouldn't be such a bother. 

I also received PMs with thank you note, which was much, much more than I expected, and I really liked them, although sometimes they made me blush....


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## 3.1416

Gracias...
i am lazy to surf thru my posts but i am pretty sure that every thread opened by me has the "Thanks in advance" phrase on it... maybe, i'm one of those people that can't write "thanks" in every reply but, like Natasha2k, i send and receive & send PMs filled with a thank you note... whenever i feel that the people in the forum is being nice i send them a PM, when i feel them not nice i send them a PM too... some people here would tell you.

As a Mexican, i was well educated by (a Mexican)grandma and as i was the first grandson, all the old ladies around treated me and educated me properly.


I think that due to the nature of the forum existence, many ofus have no time to be doing the politeness ritual, i myself have the WR opened almost 24/7 and i don't post as often because i'm working and sometimes while working i forget all about me and therefore gratitude... i

I remember a thread where someone forgot to say thanks and the other forer@ got very sensitive about it...

My Point:
I write here because it has helped me a lot and i've found amazing people here, everytime i PM with other users we talk about what we've learned and what we share...
Maybe we are too young & idealist but im sure that i'm not the only one that enjoys while sharing, no matter if a "Thank you" note is not there.
We experience cosas mas culeras en la vida(la vida real, no la de atras del monitor) como para detenernos a ver si alguien a quien no le veo la cara me dice gracias... i mean, se que es muy polite y necesario pero siendo honestos, mucha gente que si cree en un dios no le da gracias... porque dale gracias a una persona faceless?
A mi no me molesta que no digan gracias, si es algo que me costo investigar para poder contestar pues yo le digo gracias a la persona que pregunto porque me ha enseñado que hay mas cosas por saber y porque en serio... nada mas los jovenes damos sin esperar?

y... porque preocuparnos de que no nos dicen gracias?
No se... pero, si se que yo si digo gracias... gracias a la vida, gracias a WR por que conoci gente muy interesante!!


And, thanks to all of you for keep reading me. 
Thanks to all of you because without you there wouldn't be such a forum.
Thank you for being part of this (i didn't started it but, i'm part of it too!).


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## natasha2000

> Por qué darle gracias a una persona faceless?


 
¿Por qué contestar y ayudar a una "persona faceless"?

If we start thinking in this way, then what is the point of places like WR?

Maybe it is better in this way:


> Por qué darle gracias a una persona faceless?


Porque esa persona también contestó a otra "persona faceless". ¿No te parece suficiente?


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## 3.1416

That was my point, 
Mi punto era el _'porquè?'_.
 Soy muy malo para expresarme... como sea, esa era la pregunta que me hacia contestarle a la gente sin rostro; 
                                                            Porque son como yo.
Porque alguien -tambien sin rostro- me contesto y porque asi crecemos todos... Exacto! Ese es el motivo de la existencia de lugares como WR!!
                   creo
Thanks for showing me that.


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## natasha2000

3.1416 said:


> That was my point,
> Mi punto era el _'por qué'_.
> Soy muy malo para expresarme... como sea, esa era la pregunta que me hacia contestarle a la gente sin rostro;
> Porque son como yo.
> Porque alguien -tambien sin rostro- me contesto y porque asi crecemos todos... Exacto! Ese es el motivo de la existencia de lugares como WR!!
> creo
> Thanks for showing me that.


 
Siento por hacer eso, y espero que no te moleste, pero si es una pregunta va separado y con el acento en "que". Si no lo escibes asi, las frases se hacen muy confusas.


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## Bil

It always feels good to hear just a collective 'thank you' even three or four days after the fact.  But, no shit, there have been a lot of times where I have spent more than an hour downloading PDF's to find a direct translation for somebody and end up with not a single word of thanks in return.  It takes all of 30 seconds to clic on REPLY and say, "Thanks to all," and I make a point of remembering the user names of the jerks that apparently are too busy sitting on their thumbs.  And such tacky behavior on the part of so many in this forum serves as a nagging reminder that the world is filled with selfish, cheesy sub-humans.

I try not to think about these thoughtless 'it' creatures.  I mean, like, they're thoroughly disgusting.  What else are they overlooking?  Like do they even wash their hands after going to the bathroom?  Do they change their socks, shower, or floss their teeth now and then?  I'd barf if I had to share food with 'em.  I'd have to spend a day washing my furniture if for some reason they entered my place.


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## Nunty

I always say thank you, on- and offline.

In the forums, if someone's reply is not quite enough or raises more questions, I thank her and add my further comments. Otherwise, I wait for several responses or the perceived end of the thread. Then, if there were only two or three responses, I thank each by name; otherwise, I use a global thank you.

I don't mind the person who sometimes doesn't say thank you, but I get quite irritated with people who open a lot of threads and never say thank you or even acknowledge the help offered (even though they are clearly still around). 

I post in several different forums here and I've noticed the politeness level is different from language to language. If you're ever starved for elegant good manners, go visit Italian-English. I once got stuck in a thank you-you're welcome revolving door there and I had to PM a mod to find out how to get unstuck! I've also noticed that many of the English Only posters from Asian countries give quite elegant thank-yous, relating specifically to what was helpful. Very nice.

In Israel we don't say please as much as in some other cultures, but we say thank you pretty much all the time, although it's often perfunctory.


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## KateNicole

I _try_ to say thank you, but I'm not always able to do so immediately, and sometimes end up just forgetting about a post I may have started.  Sometimes I'll post a question when I have a free minute at work and not be able to get back to it until three days or even three weeks later.  I don't always feel like re-opening an old post just to say thank you, because I figured the other foreros didn't care that much (although now I see I'm wrong) and I don't like to "bump" old posts to the top of the list that contain no new information other than a "thank you."    I guess I thank people about the half the time, and when I don't thank someone, it's never because I wasn't satisfied or grateful--my attention span is just too unfortunately short.  If I ask for help with something that would require a great deal of work (like correcting an essay) I always make it a point to say thank you.  If I'm searching for a one-word translation that "you either know or you don't" I might not necessarily reopen the thread to thank someone.  I don't expect people to thank me for quick, short translation help, either.  I just assume their gratitude unless they come back to complain 
I think my lack of thanking every single person who has ever helped me is forgiveable because I always try to help, too.  *I'm not one of those people who never contributes anything and just comes on here to post things like "HeLp  me tRaNlsaTe tHis tExt meSsAge from thi$ cute Puerto Rican  p@pi tHAt I met at wOrk . . . "
*(Thankfully they represent the minority and won't be reading this, anyway.)

So to all those I have never thanked, THANK YOU, and forgive me, also.


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## Etcetera

I have another question. 
Do you say "You're welcome" or something like that to a person who has thanked _you_?


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## natasha2000

Etcetera said:


> I have another question.
> Do you say "You're welcome" or something like that to a person who has thanked _you_?


 
Sometimes, if I see the "thank you" immediatelly after it was sent. But if not, then I don't, for the reason KateNikole mantioned - Bumping up the treat on the top of the page with posts that contain no important info about the topic. Furthermore, I think it is rather unnecessary - we are all here to help each other. At least this is supposed to be the objective of a place like this...


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## Venezuelan_sweetie

Alright...

I haven't read all the posts but what I have read so far sounds quite interesting.

Now, here go my 2 cents:

Off-line, I'm constantly saying "thank you" to almost everyone (and for virtually everything) that seems to deserve it. I just think it is polite to do so, and as they say in my homeland, "_lo cortés no le quita lo valiente_" (something like "politeness doesn't take away your boldness", or "you don't stop being brave just by being polite")

On-line, I see it pretty much the same. I mean, all those great forum members are helping you out of their kindness. They're not receving any type of payback, so the least you can do is say a tiny little "thank you", which won't hurt anyone.

Some members thank beforehand, for the reasons that have been so clearly stated in the posts above, which I find perfectly appropriate. Some others thank later on, once they have received some feedback. And even others (like me, I'm afraid   ) just simply forget to do so, once in a while...

Of course, there are always 'ungrateful' ones who just skip politeness and go straight to business. Their loss, I suppose.


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## Maja

Cracker Jack said:


> Something just crossed my mind. Whenever I start a thread, that's because I want to learn. If I get replies, I make it a point to say thank you to all who have responded. I have noticed that there are thread starters who don't bother to do so. There are those who posted but are no longer around at a later date.  However, some ''ungrateful ones'' are still on the forum after their act of ''ingratitude.''


All I can say is: if I've ever forgotten to say thank you to you guys, I  sincerely apologize  and please don't stop posting in my threads!!! 
Sometimes I just forget about all those threads and discussions  I am participating in, and I don't always get notifications about news posts in  my email. So it happened to me, more then once, to find out about smo's comment  on my post, or a thank you note after a while...


Cracker Jack said:


> Also if there is a someone who had been ''ungrateful'' and posts again, would you still be willing to help him?


 Yes.


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## Dr. Quizá

In forums this is a dilemma for me! I don't want to look ungrateful, but on the other hand a "thank you" will almost surely mean an unnecesary bump of my thread over other still opened questions and I think this wouldn't be considerated to the owners of that threads, specially if they're send to the second page!


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## jinti

Etcetera said:


> I have another question.
> Do you say "You're welcome" or something like that to a person who has thanked _you_?


I don't, generally, because of what KateNicole and others have said about bumping threads for non-contributory comments.

But I do like the thank-yous.   I'm here to help and it's nice to know when I have (or haven't).


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## panjandrum

There are many ways of expressing thanks.
Sometimes appreciation is indeed a simple thank you.
Sometimes appreciation is in the discussion on the thread, where the enthusiasm of the discussion is an appreciation for everyone who contributes. I like those  

As one who mostly responds to questions, rather than asking, most of the time I really don't notice whether there are explicit thanks on the thread. I suppose I am more inclined to look for engagement with the forums as appreciation.

So what I do notice are those who ask questions and never engage in discussion on the topics or offer any help to others. Even if they post thanks, I wonder ...

As for "You're welcome," in response to thanks?
Really not necessary, I hope.
I've never posted a you're welcome, though I have posted a response to thanks that included an appreciation for the pleasure I've had in responding to the question and the learning that's involved in many responses.


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## Etcetera

As for me, I usually say "You're welcome" in the Slavic Languages forum in response to a "fresh" "Thank you". This forum is much calmer than EO or even CD.


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## Cracker Jack

First of all, thank you very much for your collective replies.  I was able to amass a wealth of opinions. It really enlightened me to learn about a diversity of opinions about something which may seem on the surface too trifling.  But from the turn-out of your responses,  I came to the conclusion that this is somehow a meaty one.  Judging from the deluge of your replies.

I have observed that some have stated that they cannot repeatedly acknowledge the replies of the others everytime they post.  I share the same sentiment because if I do so, it would seem that I dominate the thread I started after all.  If any, I only contribute to a thread of a topic in which I am very passionate about.  Otherwise, if I get the response that I need right away, I would give my thank you.  And with this, I would like you all to know that I am immensely grateful for all your responses.  

I must admit, WR has helped me mature in a linguistic way.  I am profusely grateful.  Cheers.


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## Pedro y La Torre

I used to but then I found as soon as I say it, it frequently stops people posting other replies as they think the question has been answered, when perhaps their suggestions may come in handy. So instead I just say _Merci d'avance_ at the start.


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