# If you can read this, the bi*ch fell off.



## Duckrider

First, an apology to anyone who might offended by the phrase I'm trying to translate. The rules said to put the phrase in the thread title. Let me explain what I'm looking for help with. I recently purchased a Ducati motorcycle. I have a leather jacket that I purchased for riding. I would like to have an Italian flag silk screened on the jacket along with the phrase, "If you can read this, the bitch fell off." It's meant to be tongue in cheek and amusing, not vulgar. 

When I attempt to translate on websites, I'm getting very literal translations. I'm seeking some help with a more colloquial or slang way to say this. Any help would be appreciated. Again, I hope I haven't offended anyone. If you do translate this for me, please give me the equivalent English so that I can figure out which would work best for me as I'm sure there are many ways to say this.


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## housecameron

Hi and welcome 
I'd say
Se leggi questo, lo stronzo (male)/la stronza (female) è caduto/a

but I guess you're referring to a girl, so it's not that nice.
By the way.... stronzo (male) was just ironic


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## Duckrider

Thanks so much for replying. I realize that this is a forum for people who are serious about their Italian....hope I haven't trivialized things....


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## pinturicchio07

Duckrider -
Rest assured, you are okay. There have been plenty of threads discussing words much more "vulgar" than what you wanted translated. Welcome to the forum!


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## Duckrider

I guess I do have one question regarding the translation: What is the front slash (/) after "....e caduto/a". Does that need to be there, or are you indicating that it's said differently depending on gender? I just want to be careful that I get it....right...*thanks*,


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## housecameron

_Se leggi questo,  la  stronza è caduta_

This one refers to _she _(what you actually were looking for)

But this is just my attempt, please wait for other opinions.


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## Duckrider

*Se leggi questo, la stronza è caduta.*
I'm just trying to double check a translation before I commit to some painting I'm doing on my motorcycle jacket. The painting is expensive and, once it's done, it's done. I got a translation here once before (see the subject thread). I'm a little confused about it though. There doesn't seem to be a "subject", i.e. "you". Is this necessary? Perhaps you can't translate the thread quite so literally? I'm trying to translate, "If you can read this, the bitch fell off" into colloquial or slang Italian--how it would be said "offhandedly". If the original translation I have is a good way to say this, then great. Any help is appreciated. Apologies beforehand to anyone who finds the phrase offensive, it's just a little joke amonst all of us who ride.


> There's no need to open a new thread. Just post in the same old one.


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## MünchnerFax

Duckrider said:


> There doesn't seem to be a "subject", i.e. "you". Is this necessary?


No, it's not necessary in Italian. The verb is conjugated according to the person: _legg*i*_, so it's already clear what the subject is (_you_).


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## underhouse

I can't quite get the meaning of the phrase... somebody is behind you and read this on the back of your jacket: "if you can read this"... ok so far! "the bitch fell off"... I don't get this: who is the bitch you are talking about?
Maybe today I am not in form...


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## Paulfromitaly

underhouse said:


> I can't quite get the meaning of the phrase... somebody is behind you and read this on the back of your jacket: "if you can read this"... ok so far! "the bitch fell off"... I don't get this: who is the bitch you are talking about?
> Maybe today I am not in form...


The gal sitting behind him on the bike..


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## kittykate

, underhouse: 

you are driving your bike and another person is sitting behind you. The back of YOUR jacket reads: _se leggi questo, la stronza è caduta..._

They find it funny, the bikers...

caterina


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## Duckrider

Hi underhouse,
First, thank you for replying to my question. Um...Lets see. I ride motorcycles, specifically a Ducati. 

So, lets say that I'm riding along and you're behind me in a car. My jacket will say, essentially, (I'm paraphrasing a bit) "If you can read this, then the girl has fallen off". It's just a bit of a crude joke that I happened to think might be more clever if it was actually in Italian along with an Italian flag....Does that help explain any better?


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## underhouse

I thought the bitch was the bike...

I don't know, it's not easy to translate in my opinion, also because I think it is a kind of set phrase in English, isn't it?


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## Duckrider

I'm not sure....That's sort of what I'm trying to figure out. There may not be a direct translation---I'm trying to get a good translation the same idea....I welcome any ideas...


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## underhouse

In this page you can find some ideas. Here it has been translated

"Se leggi questo significa che la z*****a che mi stava dietro è volata via!"


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## Duckrider

"Se leggi questo significa che la z*****a che mi stava dietro è volata via!"

Ha! I'm not sure I can fit all of that on my jacket! If that's a better way to communicate the idea I'd welcome any thoughts about how to shorten it just a little....

By the way, everyone has been very nice to a non Italian speaker. I certainly appreciate all the help....


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## Idhoca

> If you can read this, the bi*ch fell off.


Se riesci a leggere questo, la tipa è caduta

It is not the same as bi*ch, it' s rather more gentle but I can't think of any other way... mmmh, you could change it in:
Se riesci a leggere questo, avvertimi. Non sono uscito da solo

Translation: if you can read this, tell me. I didn't leave by myself.


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## Duckrider

Idhoca,
Well, that is definitely a little gentler (and certainly more gentleman-like)..... It's been very interesting for me trying to translate the "idea" of a joke from one language to another.


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## Idhoca

*Y*eah, very interesting and funny. But not so easy.

*C*iao


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## underhouse

Maybe

_Se leggi questo la troia è volata via._


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## Idhoca

*E* chi ci va in moto con lui?


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## underhouse

Idhoca said:


> e chi ci va in moto con lui?


 
Beh... non mi sembra che l'equivalente inglese sia molto meglio...


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## Idhoca

*N*o, hai ragione, anche se il termine lo usano con più leggerezza, mi pare...


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## GavinW

underhouse said:


> Maybe
> 
> _Se leggi questo la troia è volata via._


 
Yes. "Troia" is perhaps funnier than "stronza". It's also slightly coarser (as you can see from the double warning sign). And it fits better in the context, It means a woman whose sexual mores you have no respect for. "Stronza" refers rather to a woman who's just plain nasty to others in lots of ways.

I'm not convinced by "e' volata via", which mainly means "has flown away". I think there's no need to change the specific context of the joke contained in "e' cascata" (or "e' caduta"). So my vote goes to:

"Se leggi questo, e' cascata la troia"
If you want to spell it out, this could become (space permitting):
"Se leggi questo, e' caduta la troia che mi stava dietro" (or: "Se leggi questo, e' caduta la troia che mi stava seduta dietro". But I'm sure both these are too lengthy.) Both mean: "If you can read this, the bitch (who was sitting) behind me has fallen off."

But generally I'd say your best bet would be to get an Italian biker who is au fait with bikers' slang to edit your phrase for "authenticity". ;-)


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## kittykate

Idhoca said:


> Se riesci a leggere questo, la tipa è caduta


 
I like _la tipa_ (=_the gal_) very much. But it's definitely not the same as _the bitch_.

Any Italian bikers out there? 

caterina


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## TimLA

A dumb, late question,
But do you see any difference between:

Se leggi questo...
and
Se puoi leggere...
__(potete)____

In English there is a big difference without the "can".
Thanks in anticipo!
????


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## kittykate

Hi Tim, 

I wouldn't use _puoi/potete leggere_ here but rather _riesci/riuscite a leggere_. I have no clue as to the grammar rule that makes me pick that, though there certainly is one...

As to your question, there is a difference in Italian too between _se leggi_ and _se riesci a leggere_, e.g.

_Se leggi il libro entro la fine della settimana ti darò un premio_ (neuter)
_Se riesci a leggere il libro entro la fine della settimana ti darò un premio_ (I am challenging you to do that/are you able to do it?)

In the sentence in question, though, I find _riesci a_ quite understood. You can say _Se riesci a leggere questo, significa che la tipa è caduta_ or _Se leggi questo, la tipa è caduta_. Only a longer vs. a shorter version, I guess.
Still, _Se riesci a leggere questo, la tipa è caduta_ is fine.

Maybe others will be able to explain it better 

caterina


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## CarolMamkny

kittykate said:


> Hi Tim,
> In the sentence in question, though, I find _riesci a_ quite understood. You can say _Se riesci a leggere questo, significa che la tipa è caduta_ or _Se leggi questo, la tipa è caduta_. Only a longer vs. a shorter version, I guess.
> Still, _Se riesci a leggere questo, la tipa è caduta_ is fine.


 
I agree! Using "Troia" or "Stronza" seems a bit too harsh for me. 

Ups! My bad


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## MünchnerFax

I agree with kittykate. I'll also add I don't like that _questo_ alone, I don't feel it natural in Italian. I think it's better to put a noun after it, like _questa frase._


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## fredpox

MünchnerFax said:


> I agree with kittykate. I'll also add I don't like that _questo_ alone, I don't feel it natural in Italian. I think it's better to put a noun after it, like _questa frase._


And what about a sign 'personificated'? 
I mean, a sign speaking for itself, no need of _questo, _like this:

Se mi leggi la troia è caduta!

That _mi_ refers to the sign itself, it's not uncommon to see it.

ciao
P


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## Stiannu

What about "Se stai leggendo, vuol dire che..." (If you're reading, it means that...)
or "Se stai leggendo, allora..." (If you're reading, then...)

The translation of "bitch" is a big question. Literal translations like "troia" or "zoccola" (vulgar for "prostitute") are usually used to insult heavily a woman in a very bad argument or to accuse her of sexual infidelity (or sometimes just of being very nasty, like "stronza"); but, unlike English (think of song lyrics in rap music!), these words are seldom used to indicate women as a category in a sexist way (adding an idea of despise or objectification). 
"Tipa" ("gal") is better in this aspect (it can sound like a man who takes his woman for granted, with not much respect and non-chalance, considering her nearly as an object that he finds always there, or someone not worth bothering about), but the word is far less vulgar - as other people here have remarked.


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## PurpleAngel3

*W*hat about:
"*S*e riesci a leggere la gnocca e' caduta"
*G*nocca it's a volgar way to say beautiful girl (it also means pussy)
*O*r maybe you can use "figa" that is the same of "gnocca"
*Y*ou can also use a shorter sentence: "se stai leggendo" "se leggi"


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## morgana

I agree with "Se leggi questo", I don't find it so unnatural.
But.. how to call the woman, this is a problem! 
 Stronza,  troia,  zoccola,  figa, they are all too offensive in Italian, in my opinion.
I think "tipa" (girl/woman) or gnocca (more of a sexual hint) are much better.
Even if bikers are tough people, I don't think they are so happy in insulting their women publicly


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## GavinW

morgana said:


> Even if bikers are tough people, I don't think they are so happy in insulting their women publicly


 
You (and others) are right. My vote:
1) gnocca (a "simpatico" word)
2) tipa (an inoffensive, pretty neutral word)

EDIT: New idea: How about:
"Se si leggono queste parole, e' caduta la tipa"
? Does it solve any problem? I think it does... It sort of means "If these words are visible...."


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## Angel.Aura

Too many words, too much money for the painter.
I vote for : 
- "Se leggi questo, la tipa è caduta" (soft)
- "Se leggi questo, la stronza è caduta" (harsh)


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## kittykate

I like fredpox's _se *mi *leggi_, Stiannu's _se stai leggendo_, and Gavin's _se si leggono_...

However, my very personal viewpoint is that _se stai leggendo_ and _se si leggono..._ are both too long, while _se mi leggi_ is not so easy to understand at a quick glance while the biker is passing you by at full speed on the highway 

Also, I agree with MF that _questo_ alone sounds so and so. 
My final suggestion, therefore, will be _Se leggi qui_ (here), _la tipa è caduta_. 

It'd be nice to hear from Duckrider, who started all this and then left us here like this...

caterina


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