# to bail out on someone



## Léa123

Hello!

Je me demande si je comprends bien cette expression car elle n'apparaît pas dans le dico: How could you *bail on me* like that? Est-ce que ça veut bien dire lâcher, abandonner, me faire faux bond?


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## hanbaked

To leave someone - with the inference that they then must deal with a tricky situation on their own.


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## George French

Léa123 said:


> Hello!
> 
> Je me demande si je comprends bien cette expression car elle n'apparaît pas dans le dico: How could you *bail on me* like that? Est-ce que ça veut bien dire lâcher, abandonner, me faire faux bond?


 
http://www.usingenglish.com/reference/phrasal-verbs/bail+out+on.html

Do you mean "to *bail out* on someone"?

If so, it is "to *give up* on someone".

To stop helping someone!
To leave the person alone
*Because* it has become "TOO much for the person *who* gives up"

Note it was Google's 2nd top hit.....


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## Léa123

hanbaked said:


> To leave someone - with the inference that they then must deal with a tricky situation on their own.


 
Right on hanbaked I think that it definitely the idea


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## George French

Léa123 said:


> Right on hanbaked I think that it definitely the idea


 
One more time. I believe you are mixing up "bail out" with "bail on"

Please visit:-

http://forum.wordreference.com/showthread.php?t=717970 is about "bail out."

To bail *on*: I never heard of it until this thread.  Have you (m)any examples of its use in the liturature (of the internet)?

"bail on" gives some wierd hits on Google....

GF.... I might learn something new...


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## Léa123

Hello George French,

I don't think it's bail out because in the context, a woman had to visit her boyfriend's parents and her boyfriend bailed on her, leaving her go all alone to meet them. So the boyfriend didn't help her out here, but failed to be there when she most needed him. I should have put more context in the begining  Anyway, thanks a lot for your help.


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## George French

Research research has produced

http://onlineslangdictionary.com/definition+of/bail+on

US UK difference?????

GF


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## pieanne

"Laisser tomber"?


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## Shang Qin Li

George French said:


> Research research has produced
> 
> http://onlineslangdictionary.com/definition+of/bail+on
> 
> US UK difference?????
> 
> GF


 
Don't think so; both are used in the UK
Pieane's "laissser tomber" seems right here


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## George French

Léa123 said:


> Hello George French,
> 
> I don't think it's bail out because in the context, a woman had to visit her boyfriend's parents and her boyfriend bailed on her, leaving her go all alone to meet them. So the boyfriend didn't help her out here, but failed to be there when she most needed him. I should have put more context in the begining  Anyway, thanks a lot for your help.


 
My recent research tends to indicate the richness of the English? language once more.

Both on & out are used (I had not come accross the on version).
On looks like US usage, out is UK but it *could be a mongrel*!!!

I doesn't look like a context thing, look like very? local usage.........

GF....


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## hanbaked

I wouldn't say there's a difference either - I've heard both spoken and they have the same meaning for me - I think that's indicated by your onlinelangdictionary link, George.  

A quick search in the Oxford dictionary, though, brings up no reference for 'to bail on somebody', which means George has a point.


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## Léa123

Thanks a lot everyone for all of your research which proves very helpful


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## Shang Qin Li

George French said:


> My recent research tends to indicate the richness of the English? language once more.
> 
> Both on & out are used (I had not come accross the on version).
> On looks like US usage, out is UK but it *could be a mongrel*!!!
> 
> I doesn't look like a context thing, look like very? local usage.........
> 
> GF....


 
"mongrel" in the sense of "mixed origine" probably, from the US...also probably
The fact is *we use both in the UK* (looks like they do the same in the US)


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## wildan1

_Comment aurais-tu pu me plaquer comme ça ?_


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## pieanne

wildan1 said:


> _Comment aurais-tu pu me plaquer comme ça ?_


I just came upon another use of "bail *on*" in a US novel.

"Plaquer" has more to do with love relationship. I'd stick to "laisser tomber"


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## Shang Qin Li

wildan1 said:


> _Comment aurais-tu pu me plaquer comme ça ?_


 
"_plaquer_" involves that a love relationship has being going on for some time (even inly a couple of weeks) and one of the lovers has abandoned him/her
"_*laisser tomber*_" seems more appropriate here in regard of the context

(But "plaquer" can be the equivalent of "laisser tomber" if the context allows)


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## flozzermeister

to bail out on someone:  laisser en plan quelqu'un


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## ka67

George French said:


> examples of its use in the liturature



I just recently came upon this one, confirming Hanbaked's definition:

"It was Ben. Angela was sick with the stomach flu, and he didn't feel like coming without her. He apologized for bailing on us." (Twilight Series, vol. 2, _New Moon_ by Stephenie Meyer).


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## McBabe

I find it odd that some native English speakers haven't heard to bail on someone? I don't think it's a particularly 'young' expression? 

It's often used for nights out. For example, if 2 people are going out, and then last minute one person cancels the plans and decides not to come out, you have bailed on someone.

"Thanks for bailing on me last night!"
"Did you go out last night?" "Nah, I wanted to but everyone bailed". 

Anyone else think of a good French expression? Laisser tomber doesn't really work I think in the context of 'bail on' which I am more familiar with, in which neither person has left home?


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## missjojo

Que pensqez-vous de l'expression "faire faux bond " ?


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## McBabe

missjojo said:


> Que pensqez-vous de l'expression "faire faux bond " ?



Hmm...je pense que c'est meilleur que laisser tomber (de loin!) mais je pense que ce n'est pas si spécifique que 'bail on'.

Je pense que c'est plus pareil à l'expression anglaise "to let someone down", ce qui est quelquechose plus générique. 

"J'étais censée de sortir avec des amis ce soir, mais ils ont fait faux bond". Est-ce que ça serait clair que ces personnes ont fait un plan pour sortir le soir mais puis à la dernière minute tout le monde a annulé et décidé de ne pas sortir?


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## aerach

The form "to bail" is a more or less recent development from "to bail out". It's definitely used in the US, along with the "older" form, but the posts from the British English speakers seem to indicate that it's not the case (yet?) in the UK.
Similarly: "He badgered them until they caved in." --> "... until they caved."


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## McBabe

To bail on someone and to bail someone out are different things...

"He bailed on me" and "He bailed me out" do not mean the same thing.

I'm British and I say 'to bail' and have never considered it an Americanism..and I like to keep my English British, and do not exactly adopt many Americanisms! Maybe it is just that it is frequently used in the UK by young people?


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## aerach

@ McBabe:

What I meant was that "to bail out on someone" and "to bail on someone" mean the same thing, and that the latter originates from the former.
I also wrote "more or less recent development": if you're really 20, you may simply not be aware of it.


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## Maple75

I agree with McBabe, and I think that Lea123's initial guesses are correct, you need some synonym of "abandon" or "give up on" or "quit" which is current among...well maybe under-40s? ;-)


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## McBabe

Yes, I am really 20 

I have never heard the expression "to bail out on someone". I have only heard 'to bail on someone' or 'to bail someone out'. 'To bail out on someone' to me sounds like a mistake a foreigner would make based on confusion between 'to bail on someone' and 'to bail someone out'. Maybe it is slightly older English but I have never read it in litterature either.

Strange!


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## johnblacksox

Just to comment on George French's post earlier, you can say "bail on" or "bail out on".

The original phrase was "bail out on", but over the years, it has been shortened to just "bail on".  It means "to desert" or even "to leave". 

Like if I'm at a party, and I am going to leave, I might say to my friend, "Ok, I'm bailing".  Meaning, "I'm getting out of here."

You wouldn't say, "I'm bailing out."

Or, like your original post, if I'm at a party, and I notice my friend has left without saying goodbye or telling me, I could say to him later, "Why did you bail on me?" 

"Bailing out" is used more often to describe saving someone or something.  Often financially.

Like this:  The US carmakers were going bankrupt, until the US goverment bailed them out. 

It comes from "bailing someone out of jail".  Where you put up money so someone who is arrested can be free before their trial.  That's the sense of saving someone financially.

The sense of "leaving" or "deserting" comes from "bailing out" of an airplane.  Like if your plane is on fire, and you put on a parachute and jump out, you call that "bailing out". That is the sense that you originally posted.  Except instead of "bailing out", it's been shortened to simply "bailing".


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## johnblacksox

McBabe said:


> Yes, I am really 20
> 
> I have never heard the expression "to bail out on someone". I have only heard 'to bail on someone' or 'to bail someone out'. 'To bail out on someone' to me sounds like a mistake a foreigner would make based on confusion between 'to bail on someone' and 'to bail someone out'. Maybe it is slightly older English but I have never read it in litterature either.
> 
> Strange!


 
McBabe, that sort of goes what I said above.  The original phrase (back in my day) was "bail out on", but recently, in your lifetime, it's just been shortened to "to bail on".


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## Nicomon

missjojo said:
			
		

> Que pensez-vous de l'expression "faire faux bond " ?


  C'est exactement ce que j'allais proposer avant d'arriver à ton post... et « _faire faux bond *à*_ » est aussi ce que propose le dico bilingue Harrap's slang.



			
				McBabe said:
			
		

> "J'étais censée de sortir avec des amis ce soir, mais ils m'ont tous fait faux bond". Est-ce que ça serait clair que ces personnes ont fait un plan pour sortir le soir mais puis à la dernière minute tout le monde a annulé et décidé de ne pas sortir?


 À mon avis - avec les petits ajouts en rouge - oui.





> faire faux bond
> Se dérober, manquer un rendez-vous.


 Autre idée (en lien avec la définition) : ... _mais ils se sont tous dérobés (à la dernière minute). _

_To let someone down_ = (presque littéralement) _laisser tomber quelqu'un..._déjà suggéré. 

Si je reprends tes deux exemples :
"Thanks for bailing on me last night!": _Merci bien de m'avoir laissé(e) tomber hier soir_ 
"Did you go out last night?" "Nah, I wanted to but everyone bailed". 
_T'es sorti(e) hier soir? Naa... j'aurais bien voulu/je voulais, mais tout le monde m'a fait faux bond / tout le monde s'est dérobé. _


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## Keith Bradford

Aren't there two different words interfering with each other here?

To *bale* out (of) = to abandon an aeroplane by jumping out with a parachute. Also spelt _bail_ out. Possibly from bale = a bundle or from bail = empty water from a boat using a bucket.
To _*bail*_ someone out = to pay a surety for their temporary release from prison.

I can easily see how "bale out of" an aeroplane can become "bale out of" a difficult situation, and ultimately "bale out on" a person in difficulty. But I'd still spell it *bale*.


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## aerach

"to *bail* out of" and "to *bail* someone out" are spelt the same.
Now, there's "*bale*", as in "a *bale* of hay" or "we *baled* the hay today", but that's quite different.


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## aerach

addenda:

also: *bale*ful, from bale, as in Lewis Carroll's "Through the Looking-Glass":

_It shall not touch with breath of *bale*,
The pleasance of our fairy-tale._


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## Keith Bradford

aerach said:


> "to *bail* out of" and "to *bail* someone out" are spelt the same...


 
The Shorter Oxford English Dictionary disagrees with you.


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## aerach

After verifying in a couple of dictionaries, I see that _bale_ is given as an alternate spelling of _bail_ in the context you give.
Nowhere did I see _bale_ given as the only spelling, nor _bale_ given first and _bail_ as the alternate spelling.


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## wildan1

The words are homonyms but not of the same origin.

My World English Dictionary defines _bale_ as related to hay, and explains its origin thus:





> *Origin: *
> 1350–1400; ME < AL _bala, _AF _bale _pack, bale < Frankish _*balla; _cf. OHG _balo,_


further calls _"bale"_ an alternative spelling for _bail _(out), and notes the etymology of that different word:





> from Old French _baille _bucket, from Latin _bāiulus _carrier


...which explains the spelling of _bail_. I am guessing _bale (out)_ is a simplified phonetic version here; the origin of _bale (hay)_ is Germanic, not French/Latin as in _bail_. ​


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## Keith Bradford

I discover that the OED accepts the alternative of 'bail out' of an aeroplane (but in a more recent edition than I have) although is a bit snooty about it - "rare form, origin US".

So it's just another US/GB distinction.


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## akaAJ

I suspect that "to bail [on someone]" (to abandon someone to his fate, on matters large or small, when that someone had a reasonable expectation of assistance, company, moral support) does in fact derive from "to bail out" (to parachute from an aircraft in distress, hence from any other tricky/risky situation).


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## johnblacksox

Keith Bradford said:


> I discover that the OED accepts the alternative of 'bail out' of an aeroplane (but in a more recent edition than I have) although is a bit snooty about it - "rare form, origin US".
> 
> So it's just another US/GB distinction.


 
Yeah, I think it's a US/GB thing.  I've actually only seen "bale" used in terms of hay.  Such the noun, "a bale of hay", or the verb, "to bale hay".


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