# Friend (a male or a female?)



## venice

May be somebody else has already asked for explanations about that, but I didn't find nothing about this topic in WR forum.
I have to translate "Stò andando al cinema con la mia amica" but "la mia amica" isn't my lover.
If I say:
"I'm going to the cinema with my friend" you cannot understand the sex of the friend.
"... with my girl friend" you may think she's my lover.(but she isn't)
May I say :
".... with my female friend" ? <---- awful !!!
"... with my woman friend"? <---- may be?
Grazie a tutti!


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## beauxyeux

*W*hy don't you simply add her name?
*B*ye


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## DAH

I'll be going to the cinema with a friend.  'Stò andando al cinema con un'amica/un amico.'


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## venice

beauxyeux said:


> why don't you simply add her name?
> bye


 
Ma lo so anch'io che con il nome sarebbe tutto risolto!( Non avrei fatto la domanda.)
Vorrei sapere dai madre lingua come se la cavano in questo caso. Ciao!


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## Trina

venice said:


> [...]
> If I say:
> "I'm going to the cinema with my friend" you cannot understand the sex of the friend.
> "... with my girl friend" you may think she's my lover.(but she isn't) Yes, it would probably be assumed you meant lover. However if a female says "I'm going to the cinema with my girlfriend/girlfriends" - it is not assumed that they are lovers. This does not work for "boyfriend". This is considered to mean lover whether or not the speaker is male or female.
> May I say :
> ".... with my female friend" ? <---- awful !!!  I've never heard this used but I cannot see any reason why you can't. She certainly would not be mistaken for your lover.
> "... with my woman friend"? <---- may be? Often you hear the term "lady friend", but again this can have the same meaning as girlfriend. Older gentlemen often refer to their lady friends.
> [...]


I'm afraid there is no easy solution. Usually we just use "friend" and the context often makes it clear.
eg
I went to the cinema with my friend. She was late as usual....


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## venice

DAH said:


> I'll be going to the cinema with a friend. 'Stò andando al cinema con un'amica/un amico.'


 
Cara Dah,
io vorrei che l'interlocutore capisse (senza dire il nome) di che sesso è la persona con cui vado al cinema (come succede in italiano).


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## venice

Trina said:


> I'm afraid there is no easy solution. Usually we just use "friend" and the context often makes it clear.
> eg
> I went to the cinema with my friend. She was late as usual....


 
Hi Trina,
Why if a female says "I'm going to the cinema with my girlfriend/girlfriends" -  is it not assumed that they are lovers.? I'd think right away they are omosexual .
And if a male says "..... with my boyfriend"? What have I to think?


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## TimLA

venice said:


> Ma lo so anch'io che con il nome sarebbe tutto risolto!( Non avrei fatto la domanda.)
> Vorrei sapere dai madre lingua come se la cavano in questo caso. Ciao!


 
If it is important that the gender of the person be known, we would find a way to say something like:

I'm going to the movies with her. Oh, you know, Jane. Oh, you don't know her?

I'm going to the movies with a girlfriend. (VERY close friend )
I'm going to the movies with Jane.
I'm going to the movies with a woman I met last week.
She and I will be going to the movies.
She'll be going to the movies with me.

VERY rapidly, in English, you can determine by context, the gender of the person.


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## Trina

venice said:


> [...]
> io vorrei che l'interlocutore capisse (senza dire il nome) di che sesso è la persona con cui vado al cinema (come succede in italiano).


I don't think this is possible in English unless you say I went to the cinema with my female friend.


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## nextdrinkplease

Carissimi! 
forme come "female friend" sono forme poco usate. Francamente mi sanno molto di libro di grammatica per stranieri (per Italiani in particolar modo). Normalmente quando un amico mi dice "you know...I went out with a friend" , non si puo' capire subito se si tratta di un amico o di una amica. Tuttavia, nella magioranza dei casi e' solo questione di pazienza: la frase seguente normalmente spiega tutto (e.g. "SHE is a course mate"). 
Comunque ,e' importante capire che il fatto che nel dire "friend" non si specifichi il sesso, e' tipico della riservatezza che caratterizza gli inglesi. 
ciao 
Nxt


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## Trina

venice said:


> Hi Trina,
> Why if a female says "I'm going to the cinema with my girlfriend/girlfriends" -  is it not assumed that they are lovers.? I'd think right away they are homosexual .
> Ciao Venice,
> And if a male says "..... with my boyfriend"? What have I to think?


I have no idea why. It is just one of those illogical quirks of the English language  (usually this is the reply* I* get when asking about some exception to the rule in the Italian language)
If a male says "...with my boyfriend", one assumes "lover"
If a female says "...with my boyfriend", one assumes "lover"
but for some reason when a female says "...with my girlfriend" , "lover" is not assumed unless one knows that the speaker is gay.


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## venice

Thank TIM and TRINA,
I think that Trina gave me the answer I was waiting for, but everything may be solved using a TimLa's sentence: "..... with *a* girlfriend (of mine), .....with *a* boyfriend". Am I right?
(It isn't necessary you answer to me, but if you wish...). Bye


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## DAH

You could say: 
I'm going to the cinema with a chick [or woman] friend of mine. I'm going to the cinema with a guy friend of mine.


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## Trina

venice said:


> [...] everything may be solved using a TimLa's sentence: "..... with *a* girlfriend (of mine), .....with *a* boyfriend". Am I right?
> [...]


Yes, this will work.
*A* girlfriend suggests a "friend" whereas *my* girlfriend suggests "lover"
However: I would caution males not to use "a boyfriend". This may still have the connotation of "lover".


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## venice

DAH said:


> You could say:
> I'm going to the cinema with a chick [or woman] friend of mine. I'm going to the cinema with a guy friend of mine.


 
Hi DAH, I'm sorry but *non capisco niente del tuo post*! 
Does 'chick" mean 'pulcino/a'?
'guy' mean 'tipo,ragazzo' but does it also mean 'tipa, ragazza'?
If it is so ' a guy friend of mine' doesn't specific the gender.


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## DAH

venice said:


> Does 'chick" mean ragazza'?
> 'guy' mean 'tipo,ragazzo' but does it also mean 'tipa, ragazza'? No. If it is so ' a guy friend of mine' doesn't specific the gender.


I think I wasn't very helpful, let's see? If I were speaking to a friend, I would say: I'm going out with a friend of mine. And, I'd stop there. I really wouldn't bother to add much more, unless I had a romantic interest in "the friend."

As AE speakers, we are more comfortable using neuter descriptions.  Ciao, Venice.


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## kurumin

venice said:


> Hi Trina,
> Why if a female says "I'm going to the cinema with my girlfriend/girlfriends" -  is it not assumed that they are lovers.? I'd think right away they are omosexual .
> And if a male says "..... with my boyfriend"? What have I to think?



No, GIRLFRIEND can also mean a GIRL'S FEMALE [heterossexual] FRIEND

 but BOYFRIEND does not have that second meaning of ''guy's male [heterossexual] friend ''


Take a look at the lyrics from the song EVERYONE HAS INSIDE [sung by an Italian dance singer called GALA]:


> excuse me, we are two
> yeah, uh, me and my girlfriend
> What? No, no, listen we are on the list
> Oh my God!, I tell you man, I come here every friday
> I'm not gonna pay tonight, alright?
> Excuse me, may I speak with Mark?
> He's not here yet? HE'S NOT HERE YET?
> Ok, is Joshua here? I'm a friend of Joshua




Na na na na nae
Na na na lah lah lah lai


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## Einstein

In British English girlfriend definitely means *fidanzata*. An Italian friend of mine in Milan, who knew British English, was caught by this because he met an American girl and when she mentioned a *girlfriend *of hers he kept his distance. However, the misunderstanding was overcome and now they're married... and he speaks American English!


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## Siberia

I'm going out with my friend, Elisabetta.


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## BlueWolf

venice said:


> "Stò andando al cinema con la mia amica"


 
Sorry if I correct you, but sto isn't written with the accent.


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## venice

BlueWolf said:


> Sorry if I correct you, but sto isn't written with the accent.


 

E' vero BlueWolf, ma è una svista che mi capita spesso. Speriamo che quelli che studiano italiano non se ne siano accorti. Ciao e grazie


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## Siena

Venice - I thought you might also like to know that saying "I didn't find nothing" is considered a double negative, which translates to "I did find something"!  It is correct to say "I didn't find anything."

Also, I do say I am going to the movies with a female friend.


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## venice

Siena said:


> Venice - I thought you might also like to know that saying "I didn't find nothing" is considered a double negative, which translates to "I did find something"! It is correct to say "I didn't find anything."
> 
> Also, I do say I am going to the movies with a female friend.


 
Hi Siena ,
yes, you are right! I know this rule and it was an oversight.
I think I can say also: 'I found nothing".
Thanks a lot.


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## Trina

I think I can say also: 'I found nothing". 

To Siena: Welcome to the Forums!


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## ITCDN

In my opinion there is no solution other than say "with a friend", then if you need/want to specify the gender you may add the first name "with a friend, Julia".
There is no way in English, Italian is more specific in this case(amico/amica).


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## audia

TimLA and Siberia have solved your problem the best in my opinion.


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## max11

I don't remember where but I found, and then used, "a girl friend of mine" different "from girlfriend"


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## london calling

Einstein said:


> In British English girlfriend definitely means *fidanzata*. An Italian friend of mine in Milan, who knew British English, was caught by this because he met an American girl and when she mentioned a *girlfriend *of hers he kept his distance. However, the misunderstanding was overcome and now they're married... and he speaks American English!


Einstein, my mother always refers to her "girlfriends" and she like me is London-born and bred! I think it's obvious to us BE speakers what is meant by _girlfriend_ if we hear it in context. 

I remember (years ago) a female colleague of mine who always used to talk about her companion, Joe. One day in came Joe (Jo!): a gorgeous (female) red-head ! So there we are. I never heard Jo called _my girlfriend!_


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## Einstein

london calling said:


> Einstein, my mother always refers to her "girlfriends" and she like me is London-born and bred! I think it's obvious to us BE speakers what is meant by _girlfriend_ if we hear it in context.
> 
> I remember (years ago) a female colleague of mine who always used to talk about her companion, Joe. One day in came Joe (Jo!): a gorgeous (female) red-head ! So there we are. I never heard Jo called _my girlfriend!_


In my experience (in GB 30 years ago plus occasional visits since then) a woman always used to refer to her female friends as "friends" in the same way as a man referring to his male friends. And I never heard a man refer to a male friend as a "boyfriend"! I knew of the use of "girlfriend" for a female friend but as an Americanism; I didn't find that many British people used it. Still, LC, I see that your experience is different!


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## london calling

Einstein said:


> And I never heard a man refer to a male friend as a "boyfriend"!


 
I agree, if a man talks about his boyfriend, it's quite clear what he means!


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## Kings Mistress

I am going to the cinema with *my* girlfriend (implies a relationship)

I am going to the cinema with *a* girlfriend (implies just a friend who is female)

Very simple I think


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## london calling

Kings Mistress said:


> I am going to the cinema with *my* girlfriend (implies a relationship)
> 
> I am going to the cinema with *a* girlfriend (implies just a friend who is female)
> 
> Very simple I think


 
You've got a good point there!


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## You little ripper!

Kings Mistress said:


> I am going to the cinema with *my* girlfriend (implies a relationship)
> 
> I am going to the cinema with *a* girlfriend (implies just a friend who is female)
> 
> Very simple I think


For some reason, not if you add the name. It could be because adding the name implies that you have more than one girlfriend.

*I am going to the cinema with my girlfriend Giovanna.*

That, to me, doesn't necessarily imply a relationship other than friendship. It can, of course.


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