# 照れる



## subarashiidesune

What is the correct English word for 照れる?

I called one of my classmates (who is in her mid 20s) akiko chan! and she told me that she got embarrassed... and wrote the word for me.

Is it a Japanese thing? What is there for her to get embarrassed?


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## Aoyama

照れる (te reru) : to be shy or embarrassed, as you said.


> Is it a Japanese thing?


 Yes, as it can also apply to others ...


> What is there for her to get embarrassed?


 Well, you tell us ...


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## Demurral

How long do you know her?? Maybe this CHAN was so soon?

I don't really know how sucseptible japanese are with these things...but maybe that was it...could it be, aoyama?


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## mikun

Hi,
As an senior Japanese, I was taught not to make me larger than myself.
I didn't propose that I cannot do, nor I didn't request more salary that exceed my ability 30years ago. 
It is an ancient story, the situation has changed completely now. We need promotion to show ourself bigger than myself.
Though the society has change, there remains some traditional feeling in our culture.
If somebody praises me more than myself, I *照れる *because it becomes great shame to me when it becomes clear.


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## Wishfull

subarashiidesune said:


> What is the correct English word for 照れる?
> 
> I called one of my classmates (who is in her mid 20s) akiko chan! and she told me that she got embarrassed... and wrote the word for me.
> 
> Is it a Japanese thing? What is there for her to get embarrassed?




Hi.
What Demurral said is the point. "~~chan" should be used between close friends. And Japanese tend to use her family name until getting close.

I would like to explain other possibilities with my words.
照れる＝get bashful, shy, embarrassed 

I analyzed the cause why the 20s-year-old Akiko chan got bashful at that time, as follows;

A) We Japanese often or sometimes have racial inferior complex. We or some of us tend to think Caucasians are superior. (I don't know exactly if you're a Caucasian or not, or you're a handsome guy or not,) but to Akiko-chan, you were something like a-handsome-prince-on-a-white-horse, maybe. If a prince on a white horse talks in a very friendly manner(calling her Akiko-chan) to an ordinary girl, we can easily guess what will happen to the girl, can't we? She will get bashful.

B) The second issue is about her age. Middle of 20s is another big problem. She has consciousness about she-is-no-more-young-enough-to-be-called in such a manner of "Akiko-chan". Only teenage girls or at least 20-21 years old girl who can disguise her age as teenager have the right to be called ~~chan. 
If you call her Akiko chan, she might think that your-estimated-her-age is under 20. It is a flattery.
(edit;Maybe even teenage girls don't like to be called ~chan.  Under teenage girls are best suitable to be called so.)

Of course, she didn't think you, who are the foreigner, flattered herself, nor you thought about her age. She got bashful considering Japanese classmates' reaction around you and her.

Asking a lady's age is taboo throughout the world. Asking whether a lady is worthwhile to call  ~~chan or not, is, in a sense, the same act.

My analysis is an exaggeration, as always.
To say the truth, it is not so big thing, she just got shy, didn't she? And it is only herself who knows the reason why.
To make the long story short, I advise you to call her "Her-family-name-san".


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## Aoyama

> To make the long story short, I advise you to call her "Her-family-name-san".


that is basically the point.
Calling her "chan" is showing some familiarity (which you may want to) that she is not accustomed to or that she does not want. But still, she may be here a bit "over sensitive" because Japanese girls nowadays (in their 20ies) aren't _that shy_ ...
Well, to make my long story short : "take your time and go slowly, don't rush things" ...


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## Wishfull

Aoyama said:


> Well, to make my long story short : "take your time and go slowly, don't rush things" ...


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## kuuzoku

How would the nuance of 照れる differentiate from 恥ずかしい? (other than the obvious verb /adjective difference)?


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## Wishfull

kuuzoku said:


> How would the nuance of 照れる differentiate from 恥ずかしい? (other than the obvious verb /adjective difference)?



Hi.
The girl might use both at that context.

恥ずかしい　is also used for "disgraceful" and "ashamed".
照れる　is never used for "disgraceful" and "ashamed".

ズボンに穴があいていて、恥ずかしい思いをした。
ズボンに穴があいていて、照れた。

ズボンの社会の窓があいていて、恥ずかしかった。
ズボンの社会の窓があいていて、照れた。or

エレベーターの中でおならをしたことがバレて、恥ずかしかった。
エレベーターの中でおならをしたことがバレて、照れた。


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## Aoyama

That is really the main difference and the key word.
恥ずかしい involves _shame_ (whether personnaly felt or provoked by someone). It may also simply mean "I feel uneasy [about something]".
照れる will just mean "shyness" (to be shy) due to a personal emotive feeling.
恥ずかしい is probably a typical Japanese feeling difficult to describe, 照れる is simpler and closer to what Westerners feel ...


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