# Norwegian: Thoughts & prayers with loved ones



## Grefsen

I just received the very sad news that one of my friends in Norway has just died.   

There is a website where I can post my condolences and I wanted to write something close to the following på norsk:

My thoughts and prayers are with (name)'s _loved ones_ during this very difficult time.

I'm not sure how I would write _loved ones_ in this sentence?  

Here is an attempt at writing the rest of the sentence på norsk:

Mine tanker og bønner er med (navn)s  ?? i denne svært vanskelige tiden.


----------



## Tjahzi

My condolences. While awaiting a native for the grammatical review, I would like to add some thoughts regarding the content. 

You should be careful with using the word _prayer_. The general level of religiosity differs greatly between the US and Scandinavia, and hence, assuming the people in question aren't what could be considered "particularly religious", with Scandinavian standards, I would advice against using it. I don't know anything about your personal "level of faith", but I hope not to offend you when I say that most Scandinavians would probably get a somewhat awkward feeling would they be told that "God" or "someone's prayers" were with them. That said, _thoughts_ are very much appropriate.

Regarding your actual question, there is a Swedish expression _nära och kära _- _close and dear (ones)_ which might have a Norwegian equivalent. Also, I imagine _släktingar och vänner (relatives and friends)_ would work.


----------



## Grefsen

Tjahzi said:


> My condolences.


Takk for det.  It has been a very sad day for me losing a friend who was far too young to die. 



Tjahzi said:


> You should be careful with using the word _prayer_. The general level of religiosity differs greatly between the US and Scandinavia, and hence, assuming the people in question aren't what could be considered "particularly religious", with Scandinavian standards, I would advice against using it.


In the U.S. it is so common to use an expression such as "my thoughts and prayers are with you" in a message of sympathy that it never even occurred to me that there might be a problem using the word prayer. 



Tjahzi said:


> I don't know anything about your personal "level of faith", but I hope not to offend you when I say that most Scandinavians would probably get a somewhat awkward feeling would they be told that "God" or "someone's prayers" were with them. That said, _thoughts_ are very much appropriate.


No, I'm not very religious myself and am certainly not offended, but thanks for your thoughtful consideration.  I had already went ahead and posted the following and hope I didn't make someone feel uncomfortable with this:

Jeg er helt lamslått av dette triste budskapet.   Mine tanker og bønner er med(navn)s familie og kjære.



Tjahzi said:


> Regarding your actual question, there is a Swedish expression _nära och kära _- _close and dear (ones)_ which might have a Norwegian equivalent. Also, I imagine _släktingar och vänner (relatives and friends)_ would work.


Others who posted their condolences at the website were using "kjære" for loved ones so I decided to use it too.


----------



## Tjahzi

Other than what has already been said, _trist_ is quite colloquial in Swedish and as such would come off as a little odd in such a situation, it sounds fine to me.

(Regarding _trist_, that does not in anyway mean it has to be the same in Norwegian. Formality etc. is one thing that varies greatly between Swedish and Norwegian. For instance, _snacka_ _(snakke) _is very informal in Swedish and standard in Norwegian. Similarly, _jänta _is old fashioned bordering to ridiculous.)

Also, given the fact that you are American, it's likely that people will interpret your message as a pure translation and as such probably not focus so much on the prayers part.


----------



## hanne

While we're filling the time, waiting for the Norwegians to show up ...

I don't think you need to worry about the "prayers" being a problem - but they'll probably give you away as a non-Norwegian.

Possible Danish expressions for your sentence would be "nærmeste", "efterladte", or "nære og kære" as Tjahzi also mentionied.

"Det triste budskab" would work perfectly in Danish.

Another thing that caught my eye was "svært vanskelige" - it actually sounds too strong for me (like "incredibly difficult" or so), but let's hear what the locals say.


----------



## Tjahzi

Indeed, I'm with hanne regarding the prayers. They stick out (since people normally don't pray and when you pretend to do so, you come off as religious (which, by definition, is more or less odd)), but certainly won't _offend_ anyone. Giving you away as a non-Norwegian is probably a good way to sum it up.


----------



## Grefsen

hanne said:


> I don't think you need to worry about the "prayers" being a problem - but they'll probably give you away as a non-Norwegian.


Tusen takk hanne.  That is a relief to know.



hanne said:


> Possible Danish expressions for your sentence would be "nærmeste", "efterladte", or "nære og kære" as Tjahzi also mentionied.


One of the messages of sympathy included the following sentence:

Å lese dette er sjokkerende og leit, og jeg  tenker på alle hennes etterlatte.



hanne said:


> Another thing that caught my eye was "svært vanskelige" - it actually sounds too strong for me (like "incredibly difficult" or so), but let's hear what the locals say.


I think you are probably correct about this hanne.  Here is a sentence from another one of the messages:

Tankene går til (navn)s kjære i denne vanskelige  tiden.


----------



## Grefsen

Tusen takk igjen for hjelpen *Tjahzi* og *hanne*.  

Since no one had replied directly to what I had originally posted at the memorial website, it was still possible for me to delete it and post the following instead:

Jeg er helt lamslått av dette triste budskapet. Mine tanker er med (navn)s familie og kjære i denne vanskelige tiden.


----------



## basslop

Godt nyttår alle sammen.

I think your last attempt is OK. Just to neatpick, I think it's more common to use "Mine tanker går til ... " instead of "Mine tanke er med ...". I am not sure whether one is better than the other.


----------



## Havfruen

I can't help but nitpick your English and mention I don't believe neatpick exists.


----------



## basslop

Haha - yes, my Norwegian is far much better than my English. The good thing  is that I also learn better English even on the Nordic Languages forum.


----------



## Havfruen

The level of English on this forum is much higher than most other forums on WR. Perhaps it should be the Nordic languages - English forum?


----------



## Grefsen

basslop said:


> Godt nyttår alle sammen.


Godt nyttår til deg også og tusen takk for din hjelp! 



basslop said:


> I think it's more common to use "Mine tanker går til ... " instead of "Mine tanke er med ...". I am not sure whether one is better than the other.


Which expression would be most appropriate to use if a family member of a Norwegian friend is seriously injured in an accident?  Here's an example: 

Jeg er veldig lei for å høre at din mor ble skadet i en ulykke.  Mine tanker går til deg og resten av din familien i denne vanskelige tiden.



Havfruen said:


> The level of English on this forum is much  higher than most other forums on WR.


I think it is extremely important for those of us who are fluent in English to make corrections whenever we can for the benefit of our Nordic friends who do so much to help us.


----------



## Grefsen

Would it be appropriate to send the following message to a Norwegian friend whose mother is in the hospital after being seriously injured in an accident? 

Jeg er veldig lei for å høre at din mor ble skadet i en ulykke.  Mine tanker går til deg og resten av din familien i denne vanskelige tiden.


----------



## basslop

I should work, but when thinking a bit more about it, MAYBE the last part is most suitable only when it comes to deaths? I am not sure myself either. 

Anyone else? 

This didn't help you much Grefsen, except that it may tell you that the common Norwegian does not know much about such expressions.


----------



## hanne

I was thinking the exact same thing as basslop when I read this yesterday.
I think "Mine tanker er hos deg ..." might be a better choice. I also can't quite pinpoint it, but "mine tanker går til" is just more commonly used when someone has died.


----------



## basslop

In any case I think the suggestions are a bit formal supposing that your friend is a person you know failrly well. How about " ..... Jeg ønsker det beste for deg og resten av familien." ?


----------



## oskhen

My condolences, Grefsen.



basslop said:


> " ..... Jeg ønsker det beste for deg og resten av familien." ?



To me, that sounds more like a birthday greeting or something.

By the way: It's "Din familie" (or "familien din"), not "din familien". Apart from that, I think Grefsen's last suggestion is good.


----------



## Tech12

I just wanted to add that I think wording things like this is extremely difficult, so no wonder it's hard for a non-native.


----------



## oskhen

Tech12 said:


> I just wanted to add that I think wording things like this is extremely difficult, so no wonder it's hard for a non-native.



Seconded


----------



## Grefsen

oskhen said:


> My condolences, Grefsen.


Tusen takk. The  funeral for my friend was yesterday.



oskhen said:


> By the way: It's "Din familie" (or "familien  din"), not "din familien". Apart from that, I think Grefsen's last  suggestion is good.


Takk for hjelpen.

I was wondering if it might sound more appropriate if I shortened what I  previously wrote to the following:

Jeg er veldig lei for å høre at din mor ble skadet i en ulykke. Mine tanker går til deg og resten av din familie.


----------



## oskhen

Grefsen said:


> Jeg er veldig lei for å høre at din mor ble skadet i en ulykke. Mine tanker går til deg og resten av din familie.



Sounds very fine to me.


----------



## louisjanus

I guess I've heard native Norwegians say "jeg kondolerer" and "Jeg er lei meg..."

I think jeg er lei is more a _sorry, excuse me,_ but '_å være lei seg_' is more of a deeper sorrow, and a an expression for grieving.

other words that come to mind
sorgfullt 
Norwegians use euphemisms like "bortgang" for 'death'


----------



## Grefsen

Tusen takk for det Louis.



louisjanus said:


> I guess I've heard native Norwegians say "jeg kondolerer" and "Jeg er lei meg..."
> 
> I think jeg er lei is more a _sorry, excuse me,_ but '_å være lei seg_' is more of a deeper sorrow, and a an expression for grieving.


In my example of a family member being injured seriously in an accident, I'm wondering if it might be more appropriate to write something like the following:

Det var trist å høre at din mor ble skadet i en ulykke. Mine  tanker går til deg og resten av din familie.


----------



## oskhen

Grefsen said:


> Tusen takk for det Louis.
> 
> In my example of a family member being injured seriously in an accident, I'm wondering if it might be more appropriate to write something like the following:
> 
> Det var trist å høre at din mor ble skadet i en ulykke. Mine  tanker går til deg og resten av din familie.



It works, but I think "leit" works just as well, perhaps better. But I'm not good at these things.


----------

