# 你 / 您



## kyotan

大家好！

My textbook tells me that people use 您 to a stranger, or someone older than you, but it does not explain in detail.

Could you kindly tell me which you would use in 普通话 in situations below？

1. You are working in a company. Your subordinate is 15 years older than you.
2. A stranger helped you find your way. You are 40 years old, and the stranger is around 20.
3. You are a waitress. There is a customer who comes to your restaurant everyday, and you know her very well. The customer is 20 years younger than you.
4. You are a waitress. There is a customer who comes to your restaurant everyday, and you know her very well. The customer is about the same age as you are.

Thank you.


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## SuperXW

The real situation depends. 
I would say, the priority of your considerations should be: 
*
big age difference? > friends or relatives? > job position difference? > other purpose?* 

*1. big age difference?
yes: 您
no: > 2. friends or relatives? 
yes: 你
no: > 3. job position difference? e.g. to a boss, a client, a teacher, etc.
yes: 您
no: > 4. any other purpose? e.g. ask for help, **sarcasm
yes: 您
no: 你
*
That means, when you see an old man, you can call 您 anyway, even to your grandfather or subordinate. 
For your questions:
1. Depending on the company's culture. In a modern business the superior often don't use 您, unless the subordinate indeed has a higher reputation or de facto higher status, or the superior wants to show his/her kindness. 
2. Usually the older man won't use 您.
3 & 4. The waitress won't use 您, especially when she knows her very well.


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## nightdragon

您 is a much politer way to say 你.
1, 您/你 are both OK (您 sounds politer, 你 normal)
2,你
3/4.您 (most waitress are required to call customer 您， no matter how old the customer is)


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## jinloh

Funny Q.
As a southerner in China, I just stayed in Beijing for a month. One thing I feel uncomfortable with is that almost everyone there calls each other with 您.
Well I think it is OK to use it with the senior, on most occasions I think it is not necessary and sometimes even ironical.
For instance, when I talk with an condescending staff in the hospital or someone woking in the service industry, I gotta use 您 to show my friendly attitude even if I don't really mean it but just for my own convenience. 
Personally I prefer to use 你 even in conversation with seniors or the respectable in the south of China, but I use 您 in letters and emails.


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## kyotan

感谢各位的回复！
SuperXW, thank you for the easy-to-follow solution!


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## alexonline

Hello,everyone!

Please enlighten me on how I should use 你 and 您,specifically here on the forum if I know nothing about people`s age/status etc? Is it polite enough to use 你 in this case? And how should one address people on the streets in China?

非常感谢您们  还是 非常感谢你们？


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## Mamanunique

“非常感谢你们”就可以。“您”一般用于表示你对别人的尊敬或者客气。一群人的话就用“你们”，我没听过有用“您们”的。“你们”用于任何场合都不会是不礼貌。


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## brofeelgood

There is no 您们. When addressing multiple persons, it's 你们. You may also opt for 您两位, 您几位 or 大家.

If you're striking up a conversation on the street, I hardly think people will get bothered by the choice of 你 over 您. It's not mandatory protocol, so don't worry about it. Personally, I would reserve 您 only for the elderly or someone from whom I'm asking a favour.


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## fyl

alexonline said:


> Please enlighten me on how I should use 你 and 您,specifically here on the forum if I know nothing about people`s age/status etc? Is it polite enough to use 你 in this case? And how should one address people on the streets in China?
> 
> 非常感谢您们  还是 非常感谢你们？



My feeling is that 感谢各位/感谢大家 is more natural than phrases including 你 or 您.
And I agree with above, 您们 sounds weird.


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## ElGarcia

Also agree that 您 is widely used in Beijing (like for addressing strangers on the street as well as acquaintances/relatives). Probably much less in other areas nowadays, especially in the south.


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## alexonline

感谢各位回复！


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## Yujan Chou

alexonline said:


> Please enlighten me on how I should use 你 and 您,specifically here on the forum if I know nothing about people`s age/status etc? Is it polite enough to use 你 in this case? And how should one address people on the streets in China?
> 
> 非常感谢您们  还是 非常感谢你们？



brofeelgood and fyl pretty much said it. 您们 is very rare, though, I would like to point out that actually there is such usage on some occasions, especially when you really need to underline the formality and reverence. For instance, when the 33rd Hong Kong Film Awards ceremony paid homage to the deceased filmmakers and actors of that year, the caption on the screen read 感謝您們。
1:14:34
[Please search on Youtube: 完整版 2014第三十三屆香港電影金像獎頒獎典禮]


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## Mamanunique

That's wrong, according to this dictionary. In fact ，there is not such a thing as “您” in Cantonese, which is widely used in Hong Kong.


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## Yujan Chou

Thank you for your note. I am aware that 您們 is not widely accepted yet, but as you can see, there are some linguistic examples on occasion which bears mentioning. After all, you can't learn all about a language from the dictionary, can you?


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## Ghabi

您 is merely orthographical in Hong Kong written Chinese. It is read the same way as 你 (lei5/nei5 in Cantonese). This may make Cantonese speakers write 您們 (since it's read the same way as 你們 anyway), which won't look right to a Mandarin speaker, as there is no *nin2men.


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## SuperXW

Ghabi said:


> ...which won't look right to a Mandarin speaker, as there is no *nin2men.


To Mandarin speakers, it is rare but still exists, particularly to Beijingers.
For example, in a speech of a formal school meeting, pupils would address teachers as 您们.
To use 您们, the age and social status difference must be obvious.
Hong Kong captions sometimes use 您 instead of 你 to show respect to anyone, even including showing affection to lovers. Mainlanders would not use it in such a broad way.


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## Sweetboat

[Moderator's Note: Merged with a previous thread]
教师之间可以叫‘你’吗？ 不用‘您’也行吗？
我工作在一所高中，我的同僚比我年轻两岁。我叫她‘全老师’。我可以叫她‘你’吗？


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## Ghabi

Hello. I think you can follow *SuperXW*'s thoughtful guideline in post#2 for your situation.


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