# fare il bidet



## clearcross

I'd like to know something: fare il bidet is like fare il bagno?* C*an it be translated into having a bidet?
*T*hanks


----------



## rrose17

I've never heard anyone say they were having a bidet. I believe the most usual expression would be to say using the bidet.


----------



## AlabamaBoy

I have heard most often:

taking a bath
using the bidet


----------



## Alxmrphi

rrose17 said:


> I've never heard anyone say they were having a bidet. I believe the most usual expression would be to say *using the bidet*.



But a *bidet* is not like a bath in many ways.......


----------



## anglomania1

rrose17 said:


> I've never heard anyone say they were having a bidet. I believe the most usual expression would be to say using the bidet.


 
I've never heard anyone ever even refer to this action (maybe we Brits don't talk about such things!). 
I'm imagining a situation where you have someone in the bathroom giving a commentary on what they are doing!!
Anglo


----------



## rrose17

How about "I was using the bidet when the telephone rang..." but you're right, this would likely only be said between close friends or family. And unlikely for any Brit!


----------



## joe86

anglomania1 said:


> I've never heard anyone ever even refer to this action (maybe we Brits don't talk about such things!).
> I'm imagining a situation where you have someone in the bathroom giving a commentary on what they are doing!!
> Anglo


 
Yeah...but it's likewise true that hardly anybody has a bidet in their house in England, do they? So why talk about something you really don't have? 

Before I came to England I had always wondered how you sort of cleaned yourself after...then I actually figured it out...lol...better call the whole thing off!!!

_Joe_


----------



## carpve

anglomania1 said:


> I've never heard anyone ever even refer to this action (maybe we Brits don't talk about such things!).
> I'm imagining a situation where you have someone in the bathroom giving a commentary on what they are doing!!
> Anglo


 

It might also be due to the fact of not having bidets in Britain


----------



## clearcross

*J*ust to explain the situation, *I* have a two years old toddler, and when *I* must wash her bottom *I* always say "let's go have a bidet" but *I* was wondering if it was the correct expression. *F*rom now on *I*'ll tell her something else, like let's go to wash your bottom.


----------



## rrose17

When my kids were small we'd call it a bum bath.


----------



## effeundici

I'll send a private message to Joe because I really want to understand how. This question has been torturing me for years!!



joe86 said:


> Yeah...but it's likewise true that hardly anybody has a bidet in their house in England, do they? So why talk about something you really don't have?
> 
> Before I came to England I had always wondered how you sort of cleaned yourself after...then I actually figured it out...lol...better call the whole thing off!!!
> 
> _Joe_


----------



## clearcross

*T*hanks rrose17 that's really useful!


----------



## Hermocrates

anglomania1 said:


> I've never heard anyone ever even refer to this action (maybe we Brits don't talk about such things!).



I think one of the reasons why this expression seems more common in Italian is because in this language it is also colloquially used to describe a pet that is licking itself (that is, his privates).  

E.g. Il gatto/cane si sta facendo il bidet.


----------



## MünchnerFax

I don't know if that's because I don't have any pets, but I'm not familiar with this usage. I can perfectly understand it (provided it's in a clear context) and I'd possibly use it myself jokingly, but I definitely wouldn't say it's a common idiom.


----------



## london calling

clearcross said:


> *J*ust to explain the situation, *I* have a two years old toddler, and when *I* must wash her bottom *I* always say "let's go have a bidet" but *I* was wondering if it was the correct expression. *F*rom now on *I*'ll tell her something else, like let's go to wash your bottom.


Yes, I used to say _Let's go and wash your bottom_ to my toddler!

Rye, I have never heard or used "fare il bidet" in reference to pets....but it's a good joke: I can just imagine my elderly, overweight cat struggling to get himself up onto the bidet!  What a palaver....


----------



## Hermocrates

MünchnerFax said:


> I don't know if that's because I don't have any pets, but I'm not familiar with this usage. I can perfectly understand it (provided it's in a clear context) and I'd possibly use it myself jokingly, but I definitely wouldn't say it's a common idiom.



No, non è decisamente un idiom, ma un uso colloquiale di una certa diffusione direi di sì. L'ho sentito più volte e ho trovato dei riscontri anche in rete (1 2 3 4 etc), anche se sembra molto limitato al mondo di chi ha animali in casa e parla dei propri. 

Il punto è che io personalmente ho sentito più questa espressione riferita agli animali che alle persone... (benché sul fatto che sia in prima istanza un'azione "umana" non ci piova). Quello che volevo spiegare è un perché, forse, sembra più comune/meno imbarazzante in italiano parlare di "fare il bidet" di quanto non lo sia in inglese, come alcuni notavano prima nella discussione: appunto perché in italiano è usato anche in altri contesti (animali). In inglese la situazione è diversa, perché si usano altre epressioni per gli animali.

Ovviamente non è l'unico motivo, ma ho pensato che possa avere comunque un suo peso.


----------



## federicoft

In tutti i casi non è che in italiano si parli continuamente del bidet, di come ci si fa il bidet, o del fatto che si sta andando a fare un bidet. 
A scanso di equivoci con i nostri lettori non madrelingua, è un argomento di conversazione da restringere rigorosamente alle persone con le quali si è molto intimi, e a contesti estremamente informali.


----------



## Hermocrates

london calling said:


> Rye, I have never heard or used "fare il bidet" in referenceabout pets....but it's a good joke: I can just imagine my elderly, overweight cat struggling to get himself up onto the bidet!  What a palaver....



Meh. I must have spent too much time pet-sitting or volunteering at the local kennel, then. 

I'm probably on the way to becoming the male equivalent of a crazy cat lady. Huzzah!


----------



## tastieranera

federicoft said:


> In tutti i casi non è che in italiano si parli continuamente del bidet, di come ci si fa il bidet, o del fatto che si sta andando a fare un bidet.
> A scanso di equivoci con i nostri lettori non madrelingua, è un argomento di conversazione da restringere rigorosamente alle persone con le quali si è molto intimi, e a contesti estremamente informali.


 
Perfettamente d'accordo. Io lo utilizzo scherzosamente riferito ai miei due gatti e credo di averlo utilizzato a profusione con i figli quando si trattava di insegnar loro le norme igieniche (bella l'espressione "bum bath" ) dopodiché, se ne parla davvero con parsimonia. Anche in situazioni informali non si direbbe, ad esempio: "Scusa se non ho sentito il telefono, stavo facendo il bidet." Al massimo si userebbe: "Ero in bagno".


----------



## You little ripper!

effeundici said:


> I'll send a private message to Joe because I really want to understand how. This question has been torturing me for years!!


We don't have bidets in Australia as a general rule, and I don't know what Joe told you they do in the UK effeundici, but we shower.


----------



## miri

Every time you go poo, Charles?
What a waste of water when you've got the runs!!!


----------



## london calling

tastieranera said:


> Perfettamente d'accordo. Io lo utilizzo scherzosamente riferito ai miei due gatti e credo di averlo utilizzato a profusione con i figli quando si trattava di insegnar loro le norme igieniche (bella l'espressione "bum bath" ) dopodiché, se ne parla davvero con parsimonia. Anche in situazioni informali non si direbbe, ad esempio: "Scusa se non ho sentito il telefono, stavo facendo il bidet." Al massimo si userebbe: "Ero in bagno".  Vale anche in inglese. Anzi, forse saremmo anche meno espliciti. Mi viene in mente un eufemismo che usa il mio papà per dire che deve andare in bagno: _"I have to see a man about a dog"_


----------



## AlabamaBoy

I love it, london! We used to say "I have to talk to a man about a horse." But do you have a shower or take it? (We take it.)


----------



## Einstein

AlabamaBoy said:


> I love it, london! We used to say "I have to talk to a man about a horse." But do you have a shower or take it? (We take it.)


Reminds me of my early days in teaching.
AE Do you have a shower? = Is there a shower in your house?
BE Do you have a shower? = Do you take a shower?

It seems this use of "have" is less common in AE, but I know you do say "have a good time", as in BE (not take).


----------



## tastieranera

_"I have to see a man about a dog"_
"I have to talk to a man about a horse." 
I wonder why your dads had to talk to someone about "animals"... my dad used to say something like "I have an urgen matter to take care of" o "I have a meeting" - more on the business side


----------



## Angel.Aura

Bene.
Stabilito che le usanze sono diverse e gli strumenti a disposizione anche, esiste un modo per chiedere ad un'altra persona di andare a lavarsi le parti intime? 

Penso a interazioni del tipo madre/figlio, prostituta/cliente, proctologo-ginecologo-andrologo-urologo/paziente, etc.

Sospetto che _Can you please wash your b*o*ttom/...?_ non sia sempre appropriato.


----------



## francescazzurra

Ahah!!
My grandmother used to say: "I have to go to Paris" or "vado sul trono" that could be translated in "I go on the throne/I ascend the throne confused"... Never guessed why!She loved Paris!


----------



## london calling

AlabamaBoy said:


> I love it, london! We used to say "I have to talk to a man about a horse." But do you have a shower or take it? (We take it.)


I would tend to "have" a shower, bath, whatever, but I think we've borrowed "take" from you lot over, because I have heard it from Brits....what we call Transatlantic English!

Angel.aura: that's a very good question. I think my gynaecologist has always assumed that I'd washed before going to see him...on no occasion can I remember him asking me if I'd "fatto il bidet"! And he certainly wouldn't have asked if I'd washed my bottom. That's definitely kids' talk. A typical British doctor would probably ask "Have you....?" and wave his hand in the general direction of the bathroom.

But somebody must know....


----------



## Einstein

I think "Have you washed?" is a general question and can refer to face, armpits and the rest, while "Have you washed _yourself_?" in the right context and with the right tone is understood to mean the "parti intime". Does that sound right, LC and others?


----------



## london calling

Einstein said:


> I think "Have you washed?" is a general question and can refer to face, armpits and the rest, while "Have you washed _yourself_?" in the right context and with the right tone is understood to mean the "parti intime". Does that sound right, LC and others?


Yes, plus a lot of non-verbal communication!


----------



## You little ripper!

I had a friend who said his mother always admonished her children to make sure to "wash their down-belows properly" when they had a shower.


----------



## miri

It would match our grandmothers' euphemistic expression "lavarsi sotto"


----------



## joe86

Charles Costante said:


> We don't have bidets in Australia as a general rule, and I don't know what Joe told you they do in the UK effeundici, but we shower.


 
Lol...well Charles...I just told him what people here had told me in turn, that is that they 'supposedly' have a shower after...
But as they then confessed, they can't really have a shower everytime they go for a shit...most of the times they just don't...and the whole thing is pretty simple to understand but a bit embarassing to say in public

_Joe_


----------



## effeundici

I can see this thread got really very very straight!!

To tell you the truth this is REALLY a question, we italians ask each other every now and then!

How can people all over the world live without a bidet?? My wife gets really crazy when we travel abroad!!

Corrections welcome


----------



## leenico

Maybe the answer is to carry a spray bottle wherever you go.


----------



## You little ripper!

leenico said:


> Maybe the answer is to carry a spray bottle wherever you go.


The Japanese have the right idea with their electric toilets with a butt spraying mechanism. Apparently they also have a portable toilet water spray for when they travel overseas.


----------



## effeundici

That's true!! Probably they are more obsessed than us!!


----------



## joe86

Charles Costante said:


> The Japanese have the right idea with their electric toilets with a butt spraying mechanism. Apparently they also have a portable toilet water spray for when they travel overseas.


 
portable toilet spray?...lol...oh man now I understand why they always carry those big (fashionable) purses/bags along when they travel around...ready to cope with every situation lol


----------



## pask46

This thread is amazing!
I also wonder how brits and aussies can live without a bidet... and a couple of stories come to my mind.
1- A joke from Grillo's repertory... An old lady coming back from a vacation in Italy is telling her friends about Italy, the arts, history and all those romantic wonders... "Guess? In the bathroom they also have a sink to wash the violins!"
2- Mr. Crocodile Dundee (actor Paul Hogan) during his visit in USA is hosted in a luxury hotel... when he enters the bathroom just wonders about that strange basin and its hypotetical functions... then, exulting for his discover, yells to Sue (actress Linda Kozlowsky):
"it's just to wash your ass, right?"
Well, I really don't know if the sentence was this, in English (I saw Italian version)... but you get the idea!


----------



## Rose1828

In England you have a shower after.. then you don't go again until it's time for your next shower!  Or else you buy a packet of flushable Wet Wipes. 
But as for bidets in Italy, I remember going into a public toilet, meant for both sexes and it was a hole in the ground with two spots for your feet. I came straight back out!
As for children, I just used to tell mine to 'wash your bum'.


----------



## Angel.Aura

*Nota di moderazione*



> Amici,
> 
> Vi prego di aggiungere i vostri contributi solo se rispondenti alla domanda posta da chi ha proposto la discussione.
> In sostanza: come si dice *fare il bidet*/*lavarsi i genitali* in inglese?
> La questione dovrebbe riguardare un'attività quotidiana e a noi interessa dal punto di vista linguistico.
> 
> L'aspetto sociologico e culturale, come facilmente immaginabile, è già stato dibattuto qui:
> Presence of a bidet in the bathroom
> personal hygiene: having a shower/bath etc.
> Society: Toilet Paper and Personal Hygiene
> 
> 
> Grazie per la vostra comprensione.
> 
> Laura
> _Moderatrice_





> Dear friends,
> 
> Please contribute only to answer to the main question in discussion: how do you say *fare il bidet*/*lavarsi i genitali* in English?
> It's about a daily habit and we have a linguistic interest in the matter.
> 
> The sociological and cultural aspect, as you can imagine, has been dealt before here:
> Presence of a bidet in the bathroom
> personal hygiene: having a shower/bath etc.
> Society: Toilet Paper and Personal Hygiene
> 
> 
> Thank you for your understanding.
> 
> Laura
> _Moderatrice_


----------



## You little ripper!

Another expresssion that some use to wash the whole or part of their body for the purpose of hygiene is *to do one's ablutions.*

_*A) Why did it take you so long to answer the phone?
B) I was doing my ablutions. 
*_


----------



## Hermocrates

pask46 said:


> 2- Mr. Crocodile Dundee (actor Paul Hogan) during his visit in USA is hosted in a luxury hotel... when he enters the bathroom just wonders about that strange basin and its hypotetical functions... then, exulting for his discover, yells to Sue (actress Linda Kozlowsky):
> "it's just to wash your ass, right?"
> Well, I really don't know if the sentence was this, in English (I saw Italian version)... but you get the idea!



Hehe. His original line is: 

"_It's for washing your backside, right??_"


----------

