# Is 小__ there? (phone call)



## yuechu

Hello/大家好，

I used to live in a house with about 9 roommates (all Chinese) and wanted to call the house to talk to one of them (we'll call them "小王"), but I only know their last name. Actually, a lot of my Chinese friends, I call by the "小 + last name" or "老 + last name" combinations and often forget their first names, if I know them at all.
This may sound like an odd question but I was wondering: is it weird in Chinese to ask to talk to someone else on the phone using this "小 + last name" / "老 + last name" 称呼 (n) if the person who picks up the doesn't necessarily know them on a "小 + last name" / "老 + last name" basis? (perhaps they barely know each other)
This friend is a girl in her mid-20s (whose first name I don't know).

For example:
     ”小王在家吗?" sounds weird if the other person doesn't know her that well, right?
     "王女士在家吗?"  I think may sound old/too formal? 
     "王小姐在家吗?" it sounds like a business call to me... would it be usual in this situation?
     In English, we usually just say "Is 'first name' there?" even if a stranger picks up (and it is not a business call).

What would Chinese speakers say in this situation?

Thanks!


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## YangMuye

How to address a person seems to be a very difficult question in Chinese and Japanese.

When I was in the middle school, my classmate called me by my full name in any situations.
After I entered the university, things became a little complex.

Many classmate call me "Ye哥" (brother Ye).
If he made a phone call to the dormitory I live, he would just say “Ye哥在吗？”.
But if he made a phone call to me home (I live in a different city), I'm afraid he won't call me like that, because It is probably my mother who answer the phone and “Ye ge” sounds quite rude.

Some people call me “Muye” from the first time we meet to show friendliness. I think they will ask “请问Muye在家吗” when they are looking for me.

One of my professor call me “小Yang”. If he makes a call to the laboratory, I think he will say “让小Yang接电话”. If he makes a call to my home, I'm afraid he will ask “请问这里是YangMuye同学的家吗?”.

I think if you don't want to be too formal, saying the last two characters of your friend's the full name should be acceptable in most cases.


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## YangMuye

And a simple answer to your question:
”小王在家吗?" sounds fine.
It might be preferred if her roommates call her “小王”.


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## SuperXW

My suggestion: It depends on whether you are familiar with *the one whom you are talking to*.
If you never talked to the person before, or was not familiar with him/her, just use formal titles like 王先生, 王小姐, 王太太, 王女士.
If you know who the person is, and had been met him/her for several times, you can use 小王 or whatever you like.


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## yuechu

Those are good suggestions--I am not used to saying 先生/小姐/女士/太太 in non-business situations much yet but, as you say, it is safest when not familiar with the person one is speaking to.
Thanks, SuperXW and Yang Muye for your help!


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## Skatinginbc

baosheng said:


> This friend is a girl in her mid-20s (whose first name I don't know).


Her gender makes a big difference for me.  I normally associate 小王 and 老王 with males, and I would definitely avoid calling a female acquaintance 老王.  A very close female friend, perhaps, but not for an acquaintance.


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## BODYholic

baosheng said:


> I used to live in a house with about 9 roommates (all Chinese) and wanted to call the house to talk to one of them (we'll call them "小王"), but I only know their last name.
> 
> This may sound like an odd question but I was wondering: is it weird in Chinese to ask to talk to someone else on the phone using this "小 + last name" / "老 + last name" 称呼 (n) if the person who picks up the doesn't necessarily know them on a "小 + last name" / "老 + last name" basis? (perhaps they barely know each other)



I will not add on to the grammatical aspect of your question since the rest are already doing a fantastic job.

There is, however, a logical aspect that you've to take note of. While it may be okay to look for someone, who lives in a dorm, by his/her pet names ("小王"), you have to be mindful not to do likewise when making a call to his family. Because, it can be a challenging task for your recipent to identify which "小王" you are looking for in a 王 family. And it can be especially painful when they have quite a few gentlemen in the family. 

It happened to me eons of years ago when I was in my secondary. I was young and mobile phone was unheard of. We'd school assignments during the holidays. I rang the teacher-in-charge of our assignments at his home and someone received the call. I said I was looking for "Mr Tan". I mean that's how we address school teachers in Singapore. It's Mr A, Miss B or Mrs C. And, sometimes, Mdm D.

Anyway, the receiver reminded me very politely that I called the "Tan" family and there were  *three* Mr Tan in his family. I was like .

Well, we live and learn.


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## wishonatrish

YangMuye said:


> Many classmate call me "Ye哥" (brother Ye).
> If he made a phone call to the dormitory I live, he would just say “Ye哥在吗？”.
> But if he made a phone call to me home (I live in a different city), I'm afraid he won't call me like that, because It is probably my mother who answer the phone and “Ye ge” sounds quite rude.



So, if I want to address my Qingdao colleague at work, whose name is 强, and my boss and older colleagues call him 啊强, and I'm the little one at work, should I be calling him 强哥 or 大哥? Which sounds better? And is it weird if you switch from 强哥 to 大哥 and back again interchangeably at random?

Likewise, if my other Shandong colleague's name is 莲花, and my boss and older colleagues call her 啊莲, should I be calling her 大姐, or is that weird? (She's probably at least 10 years older than me.) It's totally inappropriate for me to be calling her 啊莲 since she's senior to me isn't she? (Both in age and in rank at work.)

(They call me 小妹 at work, ....sometimes the big boss calls me 小姐.)


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## YangMuye

How to address a person seems very personalized. When in doubt, use the safest way.
If most/all your colleagues call him 啊强, and you are not new, then you can just follow the others.

When I was in junior high school, a girl in our class sometimes call me “老Yang”. I think I was 1~3 years younger than her.
When I was entered university, “Yang哥” was called by someone and was quickly spread. I'm not was youngest student, but I think I was generally 1~3 years younger than many classmates that I know their age.

I think all 大姐, 小姐 and 小妹 are unacceptable to call girls or ladies. But elder people do use it.

People live in different regions have their own conventions.


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## wishonatrish

YangMuye said:


> I think all 大姐, 小姐 and 小妹 are unacceptable to call girls or ladies. But elder people do use it.



So is 美女 more acceptable than 小姐/小妹? I overheard this salesgirl from China call her fellow salesgirl 美女. Also, if 美女 is the accepted norm, what's the male equivalent?


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## xiaolijie

wishonatrish said:


> I overheard this salesgirl from China call her fellow salesgirl 美女. Also, if 美女 is the accepted norm, what's the male equivalent?


The male equivalent of 美女 is  帅哥.
But then, we're going round the full circle: http://forum.wordreference.com/showthread.php?t=2679461


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## YangMuye

wishonatrish said:


> So is 美女 more acceptable than 小姐/小妹? I overheard this salesgirl from China call her fellow salesgirl 美女. Also, if 美女 is the accepted norm, what's the male equivalent?


I don't use 美女. It sounds flippant. Some people do use it. The male equivalent is 帅哥. They Are more often used to address strangers.

I have read a joke before.

Her: 帅哥，有男女朋友吗？
Him: 有。
Her：介意换一个吗？
Him：介意。
Her：介意多一个吗？
Him：。。。。。。

When I lived near Guangdong, people, especially salesmen, used 靓女 靓仔 to call young people they didn't know.


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## wishonatrish

YangMuye said:


> I have read a joke before.
> 
> Her: 帅哥，有男朋友吗？
> Him: 有。
> Her：介意换一个吗？
> Him：介意。
> Her：介意多一个吗？
> Him：。。。。。。



Can someone explain the joke please? :/


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## YangMuye

wishonatrish said:


> Can someone explain the joke please? :/


I have just realized that I made a mistake. I have corrected it.

帅哥 is often seen in fictions, TV, novels and used by girls to accost young boys. I haven't seen people use it in my real experience.
 I found the original version. I hope someone who is good at English translates it well.


> 我学妹看中一个我们学校的帅哥，于是走上前和人家搭讪：
> 帅哥，你有女朋友了吗？
> 有了。
> 那你介意换一个吗？
> 介意。
> 好吧，那你介意多一个吗？
> 两个月后，我学妹顺利上位~~


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## SuperXW

wishonatrish said:


> Can someone explain the joke please? :/


Her: Handsome, you have a boyfriend? (Or girlfriend, "boyfriend" could be a typo.)
Him: Yes.
Her: Mind change one? (Do you mind me becoming your girlfriend?)
Him: Mind. (Yes. I do mind.)
Her: Mind have one more? (Do you mind me becoming your 2nd girlfriend?)
Him: ...


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## Skatinginbc

美女 and 帅哥 may be acceptable for greetings among peers, but I'm afraid Baosheng will run the risk of being banned from seeing 王小姐 again if by chance her mother answers the phone and hears him saying "王美女在家吗?"  美女 may sound flirty or even lecherous to the ears of some older people.  You never know who is going to answer the phone.


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## xiaolijie

> 美女 may sound flirty or even lecherous to the ears of some older people.


This is true, and therefore the only appropriate place to use it is to much older people, when it's obvious that you're using it only for humour effect. If you're male, try calling your mother in law "美女" & see


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