# Controversial stuff



## leenico

Is it possible to love two people @ the same time? I'm talking about a love between a man & two women & visa versa. If this is possible it could redefine the word love.


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## Leopold

Has it anything to do with English???? 


L.


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## leenico

Love is a word in the English lanquage. This is a discussion about that word.


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## mjscott

Go rent the movie, _Dr. Zhivago._


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## leenico

> Go rent the movie, Dr. Zhivago.


That's just one instance. There are probably thousands of instances like that. I'm being conservative.


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## cuchuflete

leenico said:
			
		

> Is it possible to love two people @ the same time? I'm talking about a love between a man & two women & visa versa. If this is possible it could redefine the word love.



Hola Leenico,

This has little to do with the word itself; rather it's about the combination of emotions that receive that label.  I suggest you re-post this thread in the Cultural Issues forum.

If you are really curious about this, why not ask all of your friends if they have ever had strong feelings--love, if you will--towards more than a single person at the same time.  You could then report back to all of us with the results of your research.



Thanks,
cuchufléte

PS- You might even begin with Poligamous groups, for which it might be presumed 'normal' for a person to love more than one partner.


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## leenico

> This has little to do with the word itself; rather it's about the combination of emotions that receive that label. I suggest you re-post this thread in the Cultural Issues forum.


On the contrary Chuchu, it's those emotions that define the word. I posted this issue because I thought that it would be controversial enough, that many people would voice their opinions on the subject. It certainly has more value than the "journey of a sperm". Don't you agree?


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## onetwothreegood

Or see a sex councellor! haha

 You are talking about love triangles almost. Its one of the most common causes for murders.


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## Artrella

leenico said:
			
		

> Is it possible to love two people @ the same time? I'm talking about a love between a man & two women & visa versa. If this is possible it could redefine the word love.





Perfectly possible!!!  You can love your wife and your daughter!!!

Love triangles???? A lot!!! So, it's possible, though I wouldn´t recommend that kind of love...in the end someone gets hurt!!


Art


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## Emperorjojo

its perfectly possible


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## vachecow

I still don't think this conversation applies to the word love....however it is interesting


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## Silvia

Let's analyse the word love then.

1. strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties <maternal love for a child
2. attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers
3. affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests <love for his old schoolmates>
4. an assurance of love <give her my love>
5. warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion <love of the sea>
6. the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration <baseball was his first love> or a beloved person, often used as a term of endearment
7. unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another
8. a god or personification of love
9. an amorous episode : LOVE AFFAIR
10. the sexual embrace : COPULATION
11. a score of zero (as in tennis)

As you can see, no definition in the English language qualifies love as monogamous, thus I must assume that this kind of feeling is naturally non monogamous. So the word love doesn't imply it has to be monogamous.


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## leenico

> Is it possible to love two people @ the same time? I'm talking about a love between a man & two women & visa versa. If this is possible it could redefine the word love.





> As you can see, no definition in the English language qualifies love as monogamous, thus I must assume that this kind of feeling is naturally non monogamous. So the word love doesn't imply apply it has to be monogamous.


I guess what I'm saying is that the word love does not apply in this situation. However if there is a true love feeling between all of the individuals, then should the word love be redefined? What do you think?


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## Silvia

The word love doesn't imply... why is it wrong?!

And why should that word be redefined? It includes so many concepts in it that it's quite difficult to list them all!


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## leenico

> The word love doesn't imply... why is it wrong?!
> 
> And why should that word be redefined? It includes so many concepts in it that it's quite difficult to list them all!


 In that context it just doesn't sound right to me. If you think it's right use it.  Why don't we just call it non-monogamous love.  The reason I started this thread was that I was hoping someone would disagree & say something like it's not possible to love more than one person @ a time. Then we could have a really good discussion about it.  Don't you ever sleep?


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## cuchuflete

leenico said:
			
		

> Don't you ever sleep?


 Silvia loves her family, she loves her fellow moderators, and she loves helping the Forum participants, a.k.a. the foreros...thus she has little time to sleep.  She places a very high value on her non-monogamous loving of all of us.
  

cuchufléte


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## Artrella

Hi, Leenico.  It seems your "controversial stuff" it's not that controversial...

But why don't you tell us what's your point of view as regards "non-monogamous love".  Maybe we can find sth intersting for a discussion.


Bye Art


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## Artrella

leenico said:
			
		

> Is it possible to love two people @ the same time? I'm talking about a love between a man & two women & visa versa. If this is possible it could redefine the word love.




Hey, Leenico!!  So much controversy that nobody corrected this:


VICE VERSA​


Art


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## Tormenta

"Monogamous love?  What's that?  What If I claim to love two men  but I am not married to either of them (or  having sex with them).
I do not see what monogamy has to do with loving more than one person at the same time.  But again, what do I know about love   

monogamy
 [Show phonetics]
noun  
the condition or custom of being married to only one person at a time or of having only one sexual partner for a period of time 

monogamous
 [Show phonetics]
adjective 
Our relationship has been monogamous. 
Cambridge Dicitionary


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## quehuong

leenico said:
			
		

> Is it possible to love two people @ the same time? I'm talking about a love between a man & two women & visa versa. If this is possible it could redefine the word love.



Love has always been a great and timeless topic, hasn't it?

Which definition of love are you trying to explore here?  The romantic love that most people begin to feel when they reach adolescence?  The kind of romantic love that may or may not result in sex? 

Tell ya this.  Anything is possible.


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## leenico

> Hi, Leenico. It seems your "controversial stuff" it's not that controversial...
> 
> But why don't you tell us what's your point of view as regards "non-monogamous love". Maybe we can find sth intersting for a discussion.


I've always believed you have to experience it in order to realize that it can happen. Apparently there are a lot of experienced people on this thread because there were no contrarians. Therefore I cannot expound on the subject.


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## leenico

> Hey, Leenico!! So much controversy that nobody corrected this:
> 
> VICE VERSA


You're a sharp cookie Art. I'm going to have to be more careful in what I write. What part of Argentina do you come from? I was there maybe 5 or 6 years ago. I'm surprised I didn't bump into you. You're so bubbly.


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## cuchuflete

Thank heavens my socia deforme is here to support my viewpoint!   As the LLL  Tormenta has so properly instructed, Monogamy may have much or little to do with loving more than one person at the same time.  Consider, please, the following definitions:
Polygamy= Having a multitude of spouses
Bigamy=Having two spouses
Monotony=Having a single spouse.

Abrazos múltiples,
Cuchuchu


			
				Tormenta said:
			
		

> "Monogamous love?  What's that?  What If I claim to love two men  but I am not married to either of them (or  having sex with them).
> I do not see what monogamy has to do with loving more than one person at the same time.  But again, what do I know about love
> 
> monogamy
> [Show phonetics]
> noun
> the condition or custom of being married to only one person at a time or of having only one sexual partner for a period of time
> 
> monogamous
> [Show phonetics]
> adjective
> Our relationship has been monogamous.
> Cambridge Dicitionary


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## leenico

> Polygamy= Having a multitude of spouses
> Bigamy=Having two spouses
> Monotony=Having a single spouse.


You're a riot Chuchu. I'll bet if you wanted to you could add a lot to the discussion.


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## cuchuflete

leenico said:
			
		

> You're a riot Chuchu. I'll bet if you wanted to you could add a lot to the discussion.



I bet if you Leenico, and some other members of the discussion, were to add a few ex-boyfriends, ex-girlfriends, ex-spouses to the discussion, it might even get lively, as they tried to determine whether they were known and loved serially and consecutively or concurrently!!

ciao
Cuchu


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## Tormenta

I don't think this has anything to do with "defining" or "analyzing" the word love.  If I believe I love two people, at the same time, I would not care what the dictionary says about my feelings. 

 Perhaps Leenico believes it is possible to love two people at the same time, I might believe it is not, either way, a definition of the word love would not help us much. 

Now if Leenico wants to be very specific and give us an example of what he is talking about, maybe, and only maybe, we will be able to help him   

Tormenta


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## leenico

> Now if Leenico wants to be very specific and give us an example of what he is talking about, maybe, and only maybe, we will be able to help him


 Aghh! Tormenta, why do you torment me? I'm not looking for help. I bought the subject up as a matter of controversy. I thought there would be a lot of opposite views. Apparently you have an opposite view. Why don't you tell us why you think it's not possible to love two people at the same time.


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## Tormenta

leenico said:
			
		

> Aghh! Tormenta, why do you torment me? I'm not looking for help. I bought the subject up as a matter of controversy. I thought there would be a lot of opposite views. Apparently you have an opposite view. *Why don't you tell us why you think it's not possible to love two people  the same time. *





I did not say I believe it is not possible, I said : " I *might* believe it is not ". And I do not tell if I believe it is possible to love 2 people at the same time or not , because that's  a private matter; therefore, not an issue I would discuss here.    Nevertheless, I am willing to discuss your 2 lovers if you want  

BTW Tormenta means Storm


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## leenico

> I did not say I believe it is not possible, I said : " I might believe it is not ". And I do not tell if I believe it is possible to love 2 people at the same time or not , because that's a private matter; therefore, not an issue I would discuss here.


 Tormenta, we're not naming names. It's only a discussion. No need for privacy.  

P.S. Torment means to cause great suffering.


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## Tormenta

leenico said:
			
		

> Tormenta, we're not naming names. It's only a discussion. No need for privacy.
> 
> P.S. *Torment means to cause great suffering*.




I know what "torment" means; however, you might have noticed that there is a little "a"  after the 't" . *Tormenta* with "a" is Spanish and it means storm.  Be nice to me, I have many friends in this forum


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## Artrella

leenico said:
			
		

> You're a sharp cookie Art. I'm going to have to be more careful in what I write. What part of Argentina do you come from? I was there maybe 5 or 6 years ago. I'm surprised I didn't bump into you. You're so bubbly.





Good Afternoooon, Leenico!!! I am "porteña" from Buenos Aires.  Maybe if you come here again, you'll bump into me!  I'm soooo bubbly!!!!

Bussi, Art


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## Tormenta

Artrella said:
			
		

> Good Afternoooon, Leenico!!! I am "porteña" from *Buenos Aires*.  Maybe if you come here again, you'll bump into me!  I'm soooo bubbly!!!!
> 
> Bussi, Art





I think I saw that name before......but where????    

Tormenta


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## leenico

I think we beat this dead horse enough. I just want to say one thing to Tormenta. I joke a lot, so don't be angry by some of the things I say. Thanks to all the people who contributed to this thread. You have all been delightful & it was my pleasure to converse w/ you. Lee


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## Tormenta

leenico said:
			
		

> I think we beat this dead horse enough. I just want to say one thing to Tormenta. I joke a lot, so don't be angry by some of the things I say. Thanks to all the people who contributed to this thread. You have all been delightful & it was my pleasure to converse w/ you. Lee




Hi Leen,

Not to worry!  Everything is ok , I am not angry at you (or anyone else by that matter); but , of course, it is only 8am and I haven't left the house yet   

Have a wonderful day 

TormentA


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## badger

leenico said:
			
		

> Is it possible to love two people @ the same time? I'm talking about a love between a man & two women & visa versa. If this is possible it could redefine the word love.



Hi leenico.

I believe it *is* possible, so where will thread go from here?

What do *you* think about your question?

badger.


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## Learning

Hello!
Lenico said "I think we beat this dead horse enough". What does it mean? Is that an idiom?
Thanks


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## matt 204

The actual phrase is "flogging a dead horse".  I believe it originated from the time before modern machinery.  It means no matter how much you hit the horse you wont get any work out of it.  IT'S DEAD !!


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## Rob625

Hi. I'm into flagellation, necrophilia and bestiality. I'm having a great time, but sometimes I worry...
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Do you think I might be flogging a dead horse?


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## Tormenta

Rob625 said:
			
		

> Hi. I'm into flagellation, necrophilia and bestiality. I'm having a great time, but sometimes I worry...
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Maybe just a little


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## Tormenta

Hi Rob, 
I just realized that you are a Moderator. I think Moderators are entitled to flog a dead horse   

Cheers!
Tormenta


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## DDT

Rob625 said:
			
		

> Hi. I'm into flagellation, necrophilia and bestiality. I'm having a great time, but sometimes I worry...
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> Do you think I might be flogging a dead horse?




Definitely!!!?!   

DDT


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## Artrella

Rob625 said:
			
		

> Hi. I'm into flagellation, necrophilia and bestiality. I'm having a great time, but sometimes I worry...
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Hey, why worried!!! Didn't you say that you are having a great time???
Well good times are the important ones, so enjoy them!!!


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## Tormenta

badger said:
			
		

> Hi leenico.
> 
> I believe it *is* possible, so where will thread go from here?
> 
> What do *you* think about your question?
> 
> badger.




Hiya Badg,

Are you talking about two different kind of loves which complement each other or do you mean loving two people in the same way, as in being in love with two people at the same time?

Thanks,

Tormenta


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## leenico

> Hiya Badg,
> 
> Are you talking about two different kind of loves which complement each other or do you mean loving two people in the same way, as in being in love with two people at the same time?


I guess this horse isn't dead yet. when I originally posted, I meant to love two people in the same way. Both emotionally & physically. I think that you want to tell us something, but you are a little reluctant. Just let it out. No one is here to judge.


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## Tormenta

leenico said:
			
		

> I guess this horse isn't dead yet. when I originally posted, I meant to love two people in the same way. Both emotionally & physically. I think that you want to tell us something, but you are a little reluctant. Just let it out. No one is here to judge.




Lee,

I think you are right, it is pretty much alive!

If I wanted to tell you something I would have done it.  If you knew me a little , you would know that I am rather up front and outspoken (ask the other foreros).   In my previous post I was asking a direct question to Badg and I think he knows where I was getting to.  

To me this is not a matter of believing or not believing that it is  possible to love (with body, soul,heeart, mind, and passion)  two people at the same time .  This is not something I believe in or don't believe in; this is something that I do not know.

Maybe it is possible to love two people at the same time, maybe it is not.  I just don't know!

However, I can share with you what I know.  I know that it is possible to love someone more than life itself, I know that I can love someone more than my own life, I know that I can love in such a way that, for him,  I would be willing to give up  all those things I treasure and I hold dear.

  I also know that loving someone in such way can break my heart in a million pieces and it could take years to find all these pieces and put them back together. 

This does not answer your question, but this is what I do know. Can I love two people in that way and at the same time?  That, I do not know.

Sincerely,

Tormenta


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## badger

Tormenta said:
			
		

> Hiya Badg,
> 
> Are you talking about two different kind of loves which complement each other or do you mean loving two people in the same way, as in being in love with two people at the same time?
> 
> Thanks,
> 
> Tormenta


Hi Tormenta

I believe it's possible for man to love two women at the same time, both emotionally and physically. (I'm not talking about the exact point in time if you know what I mean)

Whether this love would be exactly equal in every way, I don’t know.

I also suspect that most women would not be able to feel this way about two men.

Badg.


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## badger

Hi leenico

I’m still waiting for your view point on the question that you posed.

Your question has been answered and I believe that you now have a moral obligation to express your own opinion.

So why not forget about beating a dead horse and stop beating about the bush instead.

Still waiting…………

Badg.


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## leenico

> In my previous post I was asking a direct question to Badg and I think he knows where I was getting to.


 He may know, but we sure don't. Let it out in the open.  



> I also know that loving someone in such way can break my heart in a million pieces and it could take years to find all these pieces and put them back together.


 Tell me about it. I've been there.


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## leenico

> I’m still waiting for your view point on the question that you posed.


Let's just say that I've seen it happen.


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## leenico

> I also suspect that most women would not be able to feel this way about two men.


There was a popular song here in the states not to long ago titled "Torn between two lovers". It was about a woman who loved two men. One could satisfy her in the way the other couldn't. Yet she loved them both.


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## Silvia

leenico said:
			
		

> In that context it just doesn't sound right to me. If you think it's right use it.  Why don't we just call it non-monogamous love.  The reason I started this thread was that I was hoping someone would disagree & say something like it's not possible to love more than one person @ a time. Then we could have a really good discussion about it.  Don't you ever sleep?


 It looks like I don't have any time to read what you type during my 16 hour day... I hope you don't mind.


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## Silvia

cuchufléte said:
			
		

> Silvia loves her family, she loves her fellow moderators, and she loves helping the Forum participants, a.k.a. the foreros...thus she has little time to sleep. She places a very high value on her non-monogamous loving of all of us.


 But a lot higher value on her monogamous love


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## Artrella

badger said:
			
		

> Hi Tormenta
> 
> I believe it's possible for man to love two women at the same time, both emotionally and physically. (I'm not talking about the exact point in time if you know what I mean)
> 
> Whether this love would be exactly equal in every way, I don’t know.
> 
> I also suspect that most women would not be able to feel this way about two men.
> 
> Badg.




I agree with you Badg.  It is possible but society rules don't allow this.  I don't know why.

I don't think love will be equal, because in fact you have to different people to love, and since they are different you will love them in a different way.
But still it is LOVE.  And REAL LOVE.

BUT I disagree with you in that women would not be able to feel this way about two men.  I think we are able to love two men at the same time both physically and spiritually.  I cannot see the difference between a man loving two women or a women loving two men.
Love is love for all the people, male or female.

I'm talking about REAL LOVE and not JUST SEX.

Over.

Art


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## Kay abstract

leenico said:


> Is it possible to love two people @ the same time? I'm talking about a love between a man & two women & visa versa. If this is possible it could redefine the word love.


 
Hi.

I think this does have alot to do with the actual pure defintion of the word. It's really interesting though.

The meaning of words transform and become distorted over time, as I beleive the word love has more than plenty. So without looking for a dictionary definition, it can vary through opinion.

To answer your question, in my opinion it can be possible, but many think of love as the fairy tale romantic kind of love, i.e being devoted to 1 person. 

I'd just prefer to keep the romantic fairy tale defintion in my head to be perfectly honest with you, but I'm just a dreamer 

But no, it couldn't redefine the true accurate defintion of the word.

Fairy-tale vs. accuracy, the make beleive ideal does it for me everytime! 

xxx


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