# Is it a he or she? [dog / pet]



## Akasaka

Hello everyone,

Can I use this sentence when I want to know whether the dog my friend has is male or female? What is the most appropriate expression?

Thanks in advance.


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## Copyright

You can say that but many pet owners won't like the *it. *I usually get around this with: _What a friendly/beautiful/well-behaved dog. He or she? _When I get that clarification, I can then ask (if I'm in the mood): _What's his/her name?_ Etc.


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## boozer

I find it understandable and have no problem with it


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## panjandrum

In a casual context, that question would be fine.  Or:
_... Is it a boy or a girl?_
_If you want to be less casual:
... Is it a dog or a bitch?_

Edit:  I would be surprised if anyone objected to "it" in this context - when clearly you don't know the sex of the dog and you are interested enough to ask.


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## Akasaka

Thanks, everybody. I understand "Is it a she or he?" could be used for person, too. For example, if a new student comes to the class, and if we don't know it is a boy or a girl, we can use this expression, can't we?


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## panjandrum

Akasaka said:


> Thanks, everybody. I understand "Is it a she or he?" could be used for person, too. For example, if a new student comes to the class, and if we don't know it is a boy or a girl, we can use this expression, can't we?


Yes, though again I would probably ask "Is it a boy or a girl?" ... or simply say "Boy or girl?" with a questioning inflection.


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## boozer

Akasaka said:


> Thanks, everybody. I understand "Is it a she or he?" could be used for person, too. For example, if a new student comes to the class, and if we don't know it is a boy or a girl, we can use this expression, can't we?


Yes, I suppose, but that is certainly not going to make him/her very happy


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## Alxmrphi

boozer said:


> Yes, I suppose, but that is certainly not going to make him/her very happy



Of course this is something you avoid saying close to the person.
I have to admit I've asked the_* it*_ question at least 3/4 times since starting university.


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## srta chicken

Akasaka said:


> Hello everyone,
> 
> Can I use this sentence when I want to know whether the dog my friend has is male or female? What is the most appropriate expression?
> 
> Thanks in advance.


 
Just ask if it's male or female!


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## G.Determinism

Copyright said:


> You can say that but many pet owners won't like the *it. *I usually get around this with: _What a friendly/beautiful/well-behaved dog. He or she? _When I get that clarification, I can then ask (if I'm in the mood): _What's his/her name?_ Etc.



Sorry for reviving this old thread.
Why "it" is inappropriate here? Isn't like when we use it to introduce ourselves on the phone? 
"Hi, It's G.D." 

Thanks


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## Copyright

You're the proud father of a new baby. Someone stops to say hello, looks at your baby and asks, "Is it a boy or a girl?"

Same with pets. 

Some people won't appreciate it; others may not care. But you don't know who is sensitive until you ask the question, so I avoid the situation with: "Boy or girl?"


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## london calling

I'd never refer to a dog (or a cat),  as being a boy or a girl. It's male or female (ok, dog or bitch, she-cat or tomcat, but I can't imagine myself asking that).

I'd be surprised if anyone objected to my saying 'it': I'd use that to enquire about a human baby, so why not dogs or cats? That said, I know people who call themselves 'mummy' or 'daddy' when talking to or referring to their pets. I suppose they might be offended....


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## G.Determinism

Many thanks.


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## Cenzontle

I'm surprised to hear of anyone objecting to "it" in that context.
As others have said, it's used with humans—a baby ("Congratulations!  It's a girl!") or even with adults ("Who's at the door?"  "It's your mother").
This is just a characteristic of English grammar:  "it" representing "the unknown identity", nothing sexual.
The dog owner should be happy that you are asking what pronoun to use.
Later, they might be offended by "it" in, for example, "What do you feed it for dinner?"
In American English at least, "bitch" is used *much* more often for insulting humans than for objective reference to dogs.  Many people consider it an offensive word.
One more comment:  "Is it *a* he, or *a* she?"—give each one his or her indefinite article.
Your intonation will rise on the first one and fall on the second one.


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## Copyright

london calling said:


> I'd never refer to a dog (or a cat),  as being a boy or a girl.


True. I was using the terms for a human baby. See post 2 for pet reference. 

And to repeat myself, many people won't care about hearing "it" for their pet, but some certainly do, so I try to avoid it. It's really that simple.


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## Copyright

Cenzontle said:


> The dog owner should be happy that you are asking what pronoun to use.


What people should be and what they are are often two different things.


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## sdgraham

london calling said:


> I'd never refer to a dog (or a cat),  as being a boy or a girl.


I wouldn't either, but I've noticed substantial usage in AE among breeders when referring to the sex of puppies in a litter.

It's a cutesy thing of which I wish to have no part.


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## Englishmypassion

When you use "boy or girl" for a dog, doesn't it offend a boy or girl present there and hearing you?


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## Copyright

Englishmypassion said:


> When you use "boy or girl" for a dog, doesn't it offend a boy or girl present there and hearing you?


No ... they wouldn't even make the connection. It's just another way of asking "male or female?/he or she?"


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## Englishmypassion

Copyright said:


> No ... It's just another way of asking "male or female?/he or she?"




Ok, thanks a ton. (But will the boy or girl know that? Yes, children probably do.)


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## Copyright

Pretty much all native speakers, even children, know that "boy or girl" means "male or female" when talking about animals.


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## yoha1457

hello, 
I want to do an activity about guessing who is the celebrity, my students have to ask in the first place if the celebrity is a woman or a man, could I tell them to use that expression/question "Is it a man or a woman?"  ?

Thanks


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## AnythingGoes

Yes  that's fine.


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## yoha1457

AnythingGoes said:


> Yes  that's fine.



Thanks


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## Barque

_Is it a male or a female?_ would also work, considering the number of celebrities around these days who're less than 18.


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## london calling

You'll offend any gender - fluid people if you ask that!


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## Ivan_I

Is "a" necessary? 

I have a dog. It is she. /or It is a she.


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## entangledbank

Yes, in this special situation you need 'a': where 'a she' means 'a female', and you're saying which of the two it is.


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## Ivan_I

entangledbank said:


> Yes, in this special situation you need 'a': where 'a she' means 'a female', and you're saying which of the two it is.


I see. I just don't understand why simply "she" wouldn't suffice. She also means a female. I need to think about it.


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## entangledbank

'She' doesn't normally mean "a female". It refers to a female - it refers to Helen of Troy, or Barbara Stanwyck, or your sister. But in its normal use you're not _explaining_ that your sister or Helen of Troy is female, not male.


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## AnythingGoes

Ivan_I said:


> I see. I just don't understand why simply "she" wouldn't suffice. She also means a female. I need to think about it.


In this exceptional case we're using _she_ as a noun. Your dog is one among all the many "shes" in the world.


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## Packard

I think that when I had a dog the most common way to ask was, "Is it a boy or a girl?", which seems more logical for a small dog than it did for my German Shepherd or my Doberman Pincher, or even my Chesapeake Bay Retriever, but as I recall that was the most common way of asking.


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## zaffy

And can I ask "Is it him or her?" instead of "a he or a she"?


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## Loob

No, that would be rather puzzling to the person you were speaking to, zaffy. "Is it him or her?" would imply you were thinking of a specific male individual and a specific female individual.
"Is it a him or a her?" would come closer - though it still, to me, sounds rather ... disrespectful.

I definitely prefer Packard's "Is it a boy or a girl?" Although I'd probably avoid the "it": "Is your dog a boy or a girl?"


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## lingobingo

zaffy said:


> And can I ask "Is it him or her?" instead of "a he or a she"?


In the specific context of asking the question while looking at someone’s pet dog, “Is it him or her” would of course be understood, and might not even sound particularly odd. However, it’s not the way native speakers normally ask such a question.

But I like that you’ve added the second indefinite article in the idiomatic version — “Is it *a *he or *a *she?” In my view, that second article (missing in the original question in this thread) is essential. If you just ask “Is it a he or she?”, you’re asking, in effect, “is it one of those?” (to which a valid answer would be Yes ), rather than which of those is it?


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## JJXR

london calling said:


> I'd never refer to a dog (or a cat), as being a boy or a girl. *It's male or female* (ok, dog or bitch, she-cat or tomcat, but I can't imagine myself asking that).





entangledbank said:


> But in its normal use you're not _explaining_ that your sister or *Helen of Troy is female, not male*.


London calling and entangledbank didn't use the indefinite article with "male"/"female". I've read lingobingo's post #35, and I wonder if the three sentences below all mean "which of those is it?":

_Is it male or female?
Is it *a* male or female?
Is it *a* male or *a* female?_


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## Barque

JJXR said:


> Is it male or female?
> Is it *a* male or female?
> Is it *a* male or *a* female?


Yes, they do. I don't like sentence 2 (with one "a") too much but I guess you might hear it used.


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## JJXR

Thanks for the response, Barque.


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## zaffy

-Is it male or female?
-Is it *a* male or *a* female?

So are both of those correct? If so, which is more natural?


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## lingobingo

In my experience, the most usual thing to ask is whether it’s either “a he or a she” or “male or female”. In other words, male and female would be treated as adjectives, not nouns.


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## zaffy

And speaking of cats, will all of these work?

-Is it a boy or a girl?
-Is it male or female?
-Is it a he or a she?
-Is it a she-cat or a tomcat?   -(do I use 'a'? )


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## london calling

Barque said:


> Yes, they do. I don't like sentence 2 (with one "a") too much but I guess you might hear it used.


Agreed.


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## london calling

zaffy said:


> And speaking of cats, will all of these work?
> 
> -Is it a boy or a girl?
> -Is it male or female?
> -Is it a he or a she?
> -Is it a she-cat or a tomcat?   -(do I use 'a'? )


A personal viewpoint.

1. I never refer to any animals as boys or girls, even if I am a passionate cat-person, but others do.
2. is what I would say.
3. is something I might say.
4. I would never say (see my post above) but if I ever did I would use the article.


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## margamar

I'm not a native English speaker and I consider myself a pet-lover -we've got quite a few cats and a dog at home- but I just can't see why using 'it' can be regarded as offensive, since 'it' is commonly used in utterances such as 'it's me' when on the phone or 'who is it?' when we don't know the gender of someone we're asking about. I wonder whether it's the indefinite article 'a' that seems to make the question so demeaning.


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## Packard

margamar said:


> I'm not a native English speaker and I consider myself a pet-lover -we've got quite a few cats and a dog at home- but I just can't see why using 'it' can be regarded as offensive, since 'it' is commonly used in utterances such as 'it's me' when on the phone or 'who is it?' when we don't know the gender of someone we're asking about. I wonder whether it's the indefinite article 'a' that seems to make the question so demeaning.


If you know the name of the pet, and thus the gender, then "it" is rude.  If you don't know the gender, then it is perfectly excusable in my opinion, but perhaps not in the opinion of other pet lovers.


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## Myridon

margamar said:


> since 'it' is commonly used in utterances such as 'it's me' when on the phone or 'who is it?'


While there are a few specific cases where you can use "it" about a person that doesn't mean that you can use "it" in every sentence about a person. In the third person, "it's me" would become "it's him/her" not "it's it" so that doesn't really prove your point.


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