# My name is George. How about you/yours? ....[asking name in return]



## Garuda di Dadaku

If somebody asked me, "What's your name?"
and I replied, "My name is George. How about you?" would it be idiomatic?
Or should I say, "My name is George. How about yours?"
Or "My name is George. What about you/yours?"


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## natkretep

It is more common to say, 'Hullo, I'm George. And you are ...?'

And of course there are alternatives: 'And what's _your_ name?', 'And your name is ...?'


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## Hermione Golightly

'How about ...' and 'what about ... ' don't sound natural native speaker to me, when asking about names.


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## Garuda di Dadaku

Thanks, but I don't think an American would speak that way. Can an American help me out here?


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## Hermione Golightly

Neither Brits nor Americans need to ask, because usually as soon as we introduce ourselves the other person will say hello and tell you their name. If we need to hear it again we'll ask them, but not using How about your name?


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## joanvillafane

If you need confirmation from an American, here it is.  I agree with natkretep and Hermione.


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## rino delbello

This thread has been added to a previous discussion. Cagey, moderator 

Hi All

I would like to know both if the former set of phrases is more used than the latter in nowadays' spoken language and if usage is the same for both with the same meaning.

1) Hi, I'm Peter, and you?
I'm Steve.


2) Hi, I'm Peter, what's your name?
Steve.


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## DonnyB

My overall impression is that (1) has a much friendlier tone than (2), but it's difficult to comment meaningfully on this sort of dialogue.

An awful lot depends on who the people are, and what sort of scenario you're trying to depict.


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## rino delbello

Let's say that the people are two students and they have just seen each other out of university.


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## Hermione Golightly

When you introduce yourself, the other person introduces themself without being prompted. Both are the artificial forms of introduction found in course books. It's ridiculous.


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## DonnyB

Hermione Golightly said:


> When you introduce yourself, the other person introduces themself without being prompted. Both are the artificial forms of introduction found in course books. It's ridiculous.


Yes, it's very contrived: I don't think I've ever actually heard anyone do it like (1) in real life.

I have, on the other hand, both heard and used the form "Hi, I'm Peter: you must be Steve"


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## velisarius

2_ - Hi, I'm Peter, what's your name?
- Steve._

I've used that kind of self-introduction with small children, who may need prompting if they are shy. I can't imagine using it with an adult.


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## rino delbello

OK, so, if I have understood, to sum up, the form to be used with adults is '' Hi, I'm Peter : you must be Steve '' and with children is '' Hi, I'm Peter, what's your name? Steve. ''. Is that correct? Can you please confirm it?


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## Hermione Golightly

> ... they have just seen each other out of university.


By the way, what does that mean?

Why _must_ the other be Steve? In some contexts yes but just meeting at a party, say? Unless you're picking up a girl, when you can say "Your name must be ... /You must be called Angel?


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## Ponyprof

No, because very often you don't know the person so can't say "you must be Steve."

Usually introductions take place in a social setting.

Often there is a person who knows both the strangers and will say, "Peter, this is Steve Green. Steve, this is Peter Brown." If it's formal you will shake hands.

If no one is doing introductions, the person taking the initiative will say something along the lines of "Hello, I'm Steve Green." The other person will respond "Peter Brown" while shaking hands. Or a more informal situation just say "I'm Peter."

The only case where I ever ask for a name is if I'm dealing with inquiries, maybe about our club or from a student. Then I say "I should get your name and have someone contact you," or similar. But that is not an introduction context.

If I introduced myself to someone and they did not automatically reply I would think they were deliberately snubbing me.

Sometimes at parties the hostess will introduce you to a group of strangers at once. "Peter, this is Carol, Bob, Sue, Alice, Harold and Steve." Later on in the party you might find yourself talking to Steve and say "sorry I didn't catch your name when we were introduced."


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## DonnyB

rino delbello said:


> OK, so, if I have understood, to sum up, the form to be used with adults is '' Hi, I'm Peter : you must be Steve '' and with children is '' Hi, I'm Peter, what's your name? Steve. ''. Is that correct? Can you please confirm it?


Sorry, but no - these are not "forms to be used".  They're suggestions we've come up with which we think are more natural ways of asking somebody's name than the two you'd asked us about.  As I pointed out initially, there is an almost infinite number of ways of asking someone what their name is, and the "...you must be Steve" one is obviously only going to work if you have some reason to suppose that that's who he is.  If you don't _know_, then clearly you have to devise a different method of finding out.


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## Barque

rino delbello said:


> the form to be used with adults is '' Hi, I'm Peter : you must be Steve ''


No.
Peter's colleague, John: _Peter, someone called Steve from Accounts will come to meet you at noon._
Peter: _Ok._
At noon, someone knocks on Peter's door.
Peter: _Hi, I'm Peter. You must be Steve._


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## Cenzontle

> When you introduce yourself, the other person introduces themself without being prompted.



(And thank you, Hermione, for using one of my favorite pronouns, "themself".  Don't let them talk you out of it.)


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## rino delbello

OK, can you please tell me if the two options I have proposed are set phrases or not? Thinking more about the context I mean, I disagree with '' You must etc. '' because it is a deduction, on the contrary, the two people have never met each other in this context. Regards your question Hermione, it means that it is the first time that they have seen each other.


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## Barque

Are you referring to #1 or #7?

No, they aren't set phrases. But they're common constructions in the right context.


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## rino delbello

I am referring to #1.


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## rino delbello

OK, anyway, have a look at the set of phrases below :
2) Hi, I'm Peter, what's your name?
Steve.

If I want to know someone's name, I know these phrases to ask this. Am I wrong? If yes, does it mean that it is only used with children?


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## Barque

It's not _only_ used with children, but it's far more likely to be used with children. When you introduce yourself to someone (an adult or older child) that person will normally introduce himself in turn.

I'd just say "I'm Peter" and wait for the other person to reply with his name.


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## Ponyprof

rino delbello said:


> OK, anyway, have a look at the set of phrases below :
> 2) Hi, I'm Peter, what's your name?
> Steve.
> 
> If I want to know someone's name, I know these phrases to ask this. Am I wrong? If yes, does it mean that it is only used with children?



I would never say this to another adult. I would say "Hi, I'm Peter" and possibly offer to shake hands. If the person did not respond by saying "Hi I'm Steve" or "Steve" or "Pleased to meet you, Peter. I'm Steve," then I would consider him very diberately rude and trying to snub or insult me. Unless he was under ten years old. 

"Hi, I'm Steve. What's your name?" is something I can only imagine saying to a 5 year old, or in some particularly lame brained first day of class "mixer" exercise. 

We just do not say this when meeting another adult. It doesn't matter what "dialogue" your English textbook contains.

I spent a lot of time in high school learning how to order green beans in French. I have never specifically ordered green beans in any cuisine or language except for a specific Shechswan dish that usually goes by a number on the menu in a Chinese restaurant. I lived in Montreal two years and probably never ate green beans once. I have no idea why they featured in my high school French textbook. In other words, text book dialogues can be a bit wierd.


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## rino delbello

OK, thanks a lot all of you


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## rino delbello

Hi All

I hope you're doing very well , I would like to know if the phrase you mentioned, namely Hi, I'm+name is the beginning of the way of introducing yourself in general, that is to say '' Hi, I'm+name+nice to meet you (shaking hands) or if it is used in another situation. I am asking you about this because there is both the form for children '' Hi, I'm Peter, what's your name? '' and '' Hi, I'm Peter, nice to meet you. ''. Are the two forms synonyms when applied to the respective contexts? You know that Italian people usually learn how to ask someone his/her name by simply asking '' What's your name? '' or as I wrote ''Hi, I'm Peter, what's your name?''. Is there any important connection to know about this? What's the difference between '' Hi, I'm Peter, what's your name?'' and '' Hi, I'm Peter '' ? You made a distinction between children and adults by using the two according to the respective context. Is this the difference?  I have come to a conclusion that both are used for introductions and not for asking one's name...I have been getting really confused.


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## DonnyB

rino delbello said:


> I have come to a conclusion that both are used for introductions and not for asking one's name...I have been getting really confused.


The problem you're up against here (and, I suspect, the reason you're getting you're getting confused) is that despite what textbooks may try and tell you, there's no 'set formula' for how we do this in English.  Much depends on who the people are and _why_ you're asking the other person what their name is.  

In _very_ general terms, asking someone simply "What's your name?" is going to come across as a bit rude.  As a bare minimum you need a _'please'_ on the end.  To reinforce the other point that's already been made,  the commonest scenario when doing introductions is to give your name first and then wait for the other person to volunteer theirs.

At primary school, a kid might say "Hi, my name's Peter... What's yours" but adults don't _normally_ do it like that.


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## rino delbello

OK, thanks a lot DonnyB for clearing my doubt


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## rino delbello

Barque, regards your post #23, when you say  "I'm Peter" and wait for the other person to reply with his name, do you usually do this only or do you add '' nice to meet you '' to your '' I'm Peter '' before waiting for the other's reply?


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## natkretep

Barque is unable to reply now, so let me just say that it's possible to say, 'I'm Peter' and very little else. I can imagine going up to somebody in a social setting and just saying 'Hullo, I'm Peter' and maybe offer my hand to be shaken (in normal situations without the coronavirus fears upon us). I imagine at least 'hullo' or 'hi' is required. 'Nice to meet you' is good too.


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## rino delbello

OK, thanks a lot natkretep but in normal situations as you said,  is ' nice to meet you ' just good as you wrote, preferable, advisable or of common usage?


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## natkretep

You'll need to sketch out the situation more for me to be able to say confidently that it is preferable etc. How old are the people? What kind of an occasion is this? and so on.


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## rino delbello

See post #23 for the two contexts of usage.


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## natkretep

I think you'll have to be more specific than that. I need to know things like age, formality, occasion and so on.


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## rino delbello

OK, let's say age groups from 7 to 40 (students and office workers).


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## natkretep

If you have an informal gathering at home (say someone's birthday party), with young people, I would expect, 'Hi, I'm Peter.'

If you have a company function say at a hotel with office workers from another branch, you might possible say, 'Hullo, so pleased to meet you. I'm Peter, by the way.'


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## rino delbello

OK, thanks a lot


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## rino delbello

natkretep regards your post #36, I have come to a conclusion that the phrase ' nice to meet you ' is only used in very formal context, do you agree on that?


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## heypresto

I wouldn't say it's _only_ used in very formal situations. Anybody might say it at any time when meeting someone for the first time. It's often said when parting '(It was) nice to meet you', or '(It was) nice meeting you'.


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## rino delbello

OK, thanks a lot heypresto ,  so this phrase is used always, formal or informal, with ' anybody ' you mean among primary school's students as well. Is that correct?


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## heypresto

Well, it might be a little sophisticated for primary school pupils, whose language and social interactions would be a lot simpler, but _in principle_ yes.


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## rino delbello

OK, from secondary school, is that correct?


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## heypresto

Again, _in principle_, yes. There's nothing to stop them saying it. But it's more something an adult might say. It can't be pinned down to a specific age at which it suddenly becomes 'correct' to say it, or before which it would be incorrect.


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## rino delbello

OK,  with ' a specific age ' do you refer to 20?


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## heypresto

No. I mean there *isn't *a specific age at which it suddenly becomes correct to say it.


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## rino delbello

OK, thanks a lot


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## sinukg

natkretep said:


> It is more common to say, 'Hullo, I'm George. And you are ...?'
> 
> And of course there are alternatives: 'And what's _your_ name?', 'And your name is ...?'


I would like to ask one question here. Can I ask "My name is Tom. May I know your name, please?


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## london calling

Not idiomatic. It also sounds slightly haughty or even sarcastic. It also implies that the other person does not want to say their name.


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## rino delbello

natkretep, regards post #2 which age group are you referring to?


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## sinukg

london calling said:


> Not idiomatic. It also sounds slightly haughty or even sarcastic. It also implies that the other person does not want to say their name.


I would like to ask another question which is not related to this topic. I don't know whether I can ask this question here. Please see your sentence "It also implies that the other person does not want to say their name." Here kindly tell me why you used "their name." I am a non-native speaker. Here we say "the other person does not want to say 'his' name." Is that incorrect? I would
like to get your opinion on this.


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## DonnyB

sinukg said:


> I would like to ask another question which is not related to this topic. I don't know whether I can ask this question here. Please see your sentence "It also implies that the other person does not want to say their name." Here kindly tell me why you used "their name." I am a non-native speaker. Here we say "the other person does not want to say 'his' name." Is that incorrect? I would
> like to get your opinion on this.


It's unfortunately off-topic here, but if you search for *his/her their* you'll see there are lots of previous threads explaining the use of a singular "their" to refer to a person whose sex you don't know.


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## sinukg

DonnyB said:


> It's unfortunately off-topic here, but if you search for *his/her their* you'll see there are lots of previous threads explaining the use of a singular "their" to refer to a person whose sex you don't know.


I understand. Thanks a lot.


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## natkretep

rino delbello said:


> natkretep, regards post #2 which age group are you referring to?


Any age group, where the situation isn't overly formal.


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## DonnyB

sinukg said:


> I would like to ask one question here. Can I ask "My name is Tom. May I know your name, please?


I've certainly heard this used by operators in overseas call centres, who are obviously reading it from a script of some sort.  I don't know who writes those scripts but they're obviously not native speakers because it sounds hideously stilted and unnatural.  In particular, that question format of "May I know [something]?" is something we just don't use - at least, not in modern English.


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## rino delbello

OK, thanks again but I don't understand if you are referring to direct question and answer (asking and saying one's name) to know someone's name or to a way of informal introductions. I'm getting confused again...


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## sinukg

DonnyB said:


> I've certainly heard this used by operators in overseas call centres, who are obviously reading it from a script of some sort.  I don't know who writes those scripts but they're obviously not native speakers because it sounds hideously stilted and unnatural.  In particular, that question format of "May I know [something]?" is something we just don't use - at least, not in modern English.


I understand. Thanks a lot.


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## Packard

DonnyB said:


> The problem you're up against here (and, I suspect, the reason you're getting you're getting confused) is that despite what textbooks may try and tell you, there's no 'set formula' for how we do this in English.  Much depends on who the people are and _why_ you're asking the other person what their name is.
> 
> In _very_ general terms, asking someone simply "What's your name?" is going to come across as a bit rude.  As a bare minimum you need a _'please'_ on the end.  To reinforce the other point that's already been made,  the commonest scenario when doing introductions is to give your name first and then wait for the other person to volunteer theirs.
> 
> At primary school, a kid might say "Hi, my name's Peter... What's yours" but adults don't _normally_ do it like that.


   

Absolutely. In a business environment I might just ask, "Do you have a card?"  

How it is asked is going to be dictated by the situation in which it is asked.


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## london calling

As was said above, this is textbook English. This is an example of the kind of stilted, unnatural dialogue they favour ( or used to favour: I haven't taught English in years, hopefully the more recent books are better), generally  in the first teaching unit, which is often entitled 'Introductions and Greetings'. What happens then is that the students are told  to  practice it on each other in pairs, so now we have entire generations of students going round speaking this way.  

A. My name's Peter. And you/What's your name?
B. My name's Tom. How do you do.
A. How do you do.

And these books are the reason we get questions like rino's (not that it's his fault).


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## Packard

london calling said:


> As was said above, this is textbook English. This is an example of the kind of stilted, unnatural dialogue they favour ( or used to favour: I haven't taught English in years, hopefully the more recent books are better), generally  in the first teaching unit, which is often entitled 'Introductions and Greetings'. What happens then is that the students are told  to  practice it on each other in pairs, so now we have entire generations of students going round speaking this way.
> 
> A. My name's Peter. And you/What's your name?
> B. My name's Tom. How do you do.
> A. How do you do.
> 
> And these books are the reason we get questions like rino's (not that it's his fault).


  

The new worksheets do not seem much improved; not wrong, but not natural sounding either.


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## rino delbello

OK, thanks a lot london calling and Packard but I am going to waiting for natkretep's answer, it's better for me


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## london calling

rino delbello said:


> OK, thanks a lot london calling and Packard but I am going to waiting for natkretep's answer, it's better for me


Why? I think he pretty much agrees with the rest of us.


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## rino delbello

Because I'm getting really confused, I would like to know if in his post he refers to simply asking and saying one's name or to an introduction. Maybe he's referring to introductions like the worksheets posted by Packard, is that correct?


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## Hermione Golightly

Sinukg -This is a different issue. A person means someone of either sex or any. Nowadays we use the 3rd person plural forms to include everybody. It reflects women's and others' objections to being disregarded or included as male.


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## natkretep

rino delbello said:


> Because I'm getting really confused, I would like to know if in his post he refers to simply asking and saying one's name or to an introduction. Maybe he's referring to introductions like the worksheets posted by Packard, is that correct?


I'm not sure what the difference is, rino? If you say your name too someone else, you're typically introducing yourself. And london calling is right - I agree with what everyone else has said.


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## rino delbello

OK, thanks natkretep, I agree with everybody as well but I needed you to specify what you meant . Anyhow, thanks a lot all of you


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