# Take the guns out of the hands of....



## cuchuflete

> WASHINGTON  Feb. 12, 2006 - Vice President
> Dick Cheney accidentally shot and wounded a companion during a weekend quail hunting trip in Texas, spraying the fellow hunter in the face and chest with shotgun pellets.
> The shooting was first reported by the Corpus Christi Caller-Times. The vice president's office did not disclose the accident until the day after it happened.


http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060212/ap_on_go_pr_wh/cheney_hunting_accident

Now we know what happened to the 
WMD.


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## diegodbs

cuchuflete said:
			
		

> http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060212/ap_on_go_pr_wh/cheney_hunting_accident
> 
> Now we know what happened to the
> WMD.


 
The same information in El País, translated by someone who doesn't seem to know that "alert" in English is not the same as "alerta" in Spanish. The whole text is a new kind of Spanish.


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## la reine victoria

'Never sneak up behind Dick Cheney when he has a gun in his hand,' warns *The Guardian, Monday February 13th 2006.*

Katharine Armstrong, owner of the ranch where the incident took place said -

"These things happen from time to time - you know.  I've been peppered pretty well myself."

Obviously a spicy lady. 

LRV


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## maxiogee

That happens when you go with the police on a steak-out!


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## cuchuflete

Ready, shoot, aim!!

Ah, well, such things happen from time to time...at least in the world according to Dick.


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## Agnès E.

Who said: *Qui vit par les armes périra par les armes*
(Who dedicates his life to weapons will be killed by weapons)???


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## cuchuflete

Agnès,
The common English version of this is, "He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword."  Extrapolating to Mr. Cheney's involvement in the oil industry, and considering his history of heart attacks.... He who lives by oil, suffers from fat?

Maybe he should sign an arms control treaty, just to protect his hunting friends.


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## feuerbach

cuchuflete said:
			
		

> http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060212/ap_on_go_pr_wh/cheney_hunting_accident
> 
> Now we know what happened to the
> WMD.


 
To attack Cheney on the WMD issue using this tragic accident is a cheap shot (punt intented).


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## la reine victoria

feuerbach said:
			
		

> To attack Cheney on the WMD issue using this tragic accident is a cheap shot (punt intented).


 

You certainly hit the target there, Feuerbach!  

I wonder if Dick has a horse named Trigger.


LRV
Shooting out of here
lest a Mod deletes her.


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## Benjy

ouais parce que là tu frises carrément la peine d'effacement absolu, punition la plus sévère que puisse subir un forero 

i thought it was funny.


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## feuerbach

Let's not forget that Dick Cheney is a longtime hunter and that he delivered the keynote address in 2004 to the National Rifle Association, from which he accepted a rifle as a gift.

So maybe we shouldn't be using this tragic accident (the guy Cheney shot was described as being "peppered pretty good" with birdshot) to criticize him for the WMD fiasco, but yes for supporting the gun industry. 

The news say that Cheney thought he was shooting at a covey of quail. Well, I don't know what his multimillonaire hunting partner looks like. Maybe he resembles some kind of bird or he was dressed like a bird to attract quails. Who knows. But even if that were the case, I think that Dicky is the one who screwed up not his friend. 

I see two good things coming out of this. (1) The National Rifle Association won't ask the Vice-President to deliver any more keynote addresses. Hopefully they will ask him to return the rifle they gave him before he kills someone. Just think about this scenario. What if Dick and George W. are also hunting partners? He could kill the President! (Those who just thought, "Not a bad idea" will be reported immediately to Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez for further surveillance). (2) The National Rifle Association will hopefully be mandated to affix this label to their shotguns: "If you aren't sure it's a quail, don't shoot."


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## la reine victoria

Just a passing thought . . . . . . .

Is Dan Quayle still alive and well?




LRV


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## nycphotography

I can see it now... Charleton Heston will have to hold a press conference where the NRA distances itself from the Whitehouse.  "Mr. Cheney, you git on along now and leave us alone.  We don't need anymore help from you."

Even Quayle and Ford, the two supreme F***nuts of all time never managed to shoot anyone.  Geez.

Now on a serious note:  In all fairness (and fair is about the last thing I want to be with this particular batch of elected retards), anyone who has ever hunted knows who is responsibile for staying BEHIND the firing line.  (So far) there doesnt seem to be any reason to think Cheney was anything more than unfortunate to have had a friend walk into the line of fire.  I'm sure if he was trying to shoot something it'd been a Bush or a Jackass.


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## maxiogee

Unless they are shooting grounded birds, how does anyone shoot "in the face and chest" anyone who crosses the line?

I would posit that the shooter turned, and wasn't aiming at flying birds when he fired.


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## GenJen54

The initial reports, including the one in the link provided by Cuchuflete, relay the following:

1.  Mr. Whittington went to pick up a bird.
2.  Mr. Cheney and Mr. Armstrong spied another covey, and set about aiming for it.
3.  Mr. Whittington approached the other two men from behind, giving no signal that he was behind them.
4.  The covey took flight, Mr. Cheny eyed a bird, aimed at it, followed it around and "shot."  Mr. Whittington happened to be in the "path" of the buck-shot, but it was not a direct hit.  He was primarily shot on the right side of the face.


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## feuerbach

GenJen54 said:
			
		

> The initial reports, including the one in the link provided by Cuchuflete, relay the following:
> 
> 1. Mr. Whittington went to pick up a bird.
> 2. Mr. Cheney and Mr. Armstrong spied another covey, and set about aiming for it.
> 3. Mr. Whittington approached the other two men from behind, giving no signal that he was behind them.
> 4. The covey took flight, Mr. Cheny eyed a bird, aimed at it, followed it around and "shot." Mr. Whittington happened to be in the "path" of the buck-shot, but it was not a direct hit. He was primarily shot on the right side of the face.


 
5. The White House decided to wait nearly 24 hours to inform the public that the vice president had shot a man while aiming for quail. Why? Here are some hypotheses: (1) They were trying to come up with a plan to put the blame on Michael Brown, the former FEMA director. (2) They were trying to find a look-alike in case Mr. Whittington didn't make it. (3) They were trying to convince Bush that blaming Al Kaeda for this accident wouldn't work.


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## cuchuflete

GenJen54 said:
			
		

> He was primarily shot on the right side of the face.


No surprise there.  He would have preferred to shoot at the left, but lacking appropriate skills........


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## SpiceMan

diegodbs said:
			
		

> The same information in El País, translated by someone who doesn't seem to know that "alert" in English is not the same as "alerta" in Spanish. The whole text is a new kind of Spanish.


Si, debe estar escondido y alerta, esperándo con escopetas y granadas a que pase Cheney para devolvérsela.


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## Brioche

Agnès E. said:
			
		

> Who said: *Qui vit par les armes périra par les armes*
> (Who dedicates his life to weapons will be killed by weapons)???


 
New Testament
Matthew, 26:52
_Then Jesus said to him, Put thy sword again into its place; *for all who take the sword shall perish by the sword.*_


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## SpiceMan

Well, I doubt Cheney will shot down and die. I find it similar to the US marines shooting down the escort of that just freed italian journalist. (actually to virtually any misshot by anyone, but since Cheney is american, I'd like to compare this to another american misshot )


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## GenJen54

spiceman said:
			
		

> Well, I doubt Cheney will shot down and die. I find it similar to the US marines shooting down the escort of that just freed italian journalist. (actually to virtually any misshot by anyone, but since Cheney is american, I'd like to compare this to another american misshot )



I think this is an unfair comparison, no matter how sarcastic you try to make it.  A simple hunting "accident" involving several civilians engaged in a recreational activity, and where the "victim" will likely live, in no way compares to an "accident" during wartime* where in a tense and otherwise stressful situation, military personnel "pulled the trigger" on people who were trying to run through a road block.

* I realize "wartime" is, technically, not the appropriate word for the situation, but I failed to think of another.


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## cuchuflete

SpiceMan said:
			
		

> Well, I doubt Cheney will shot down and die. I find it similar to the US marines shooting down the escort of that just freed italian journalist. (actually to virtually any misshot by anyone, but since Cheney is american, I'd like to compare this to another american misshot )



Are you suggesting we use that ridiculous military term for a mistake: collateral damage?


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## SpiceMan

reply to both:
No, I just stated what popped into my mind as I was reading the first post of this thread (I had already read about Cheney's accident). I knew someone could think something else about it and added "actually virtually any misshot by anyone", but seemed not enough. And I found it funny that what popped in my mind was that and not something else, thus "I'd like to compare this".

Wasn't the right wording, but can't say I was making an effort or something.

About "collateral damage", I think that neither Cheney's hunting accident, nor the shooting of the Italian convoy/car (don't remember what it was) can be labeled that way.


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## la reine victoria

> GenJen54. I realize"wartime" is, technically, not the appropriate word for the situation, but I failed to think of another.


 


Perhaps you were trying to say 'hostilities' GenJen, even though the needless and unwarranted invasion of Iraq has now made that country a war zone.

If you've seen the video footage (this past weekend) of the atrocious beating up of four Iraqi teenagers by 'sick' British troops, you may have paused to consider what the consequences of this act will be.  Yet more extremist revenge attacks on the west (suicide bombers etc.) and even more attacks on the invading forces in Iraq.

What a b***** mess by the Bush/Blair administration.


LRV


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## feuerbach

Cheney has been given a warning citation for breaking Texas hunting law. He and the man he shot apparently failed to buy a $7 stamp allowing them to shoot upland game birds. 

So Dick gets a warning citation for breaking Texas hunting law because he didn't buy a $7 stamp to shoot at birds but he gets away with designing and implementing the illegal and unconstitutional practice of eavesdropping on Americans?

What does the great Enrique Santos Discepolo have to say about this? This is how "Cambalache," maybe his most well-known tango, ends. 


*Dale nomas, dale que va,*
*que allá en el horno nos vamo a encontrar.*
*No pienses mas, echate a un lao,*
*que a nadie importa si naciste honrao'.*
*Que es lo mismo el que labura*
*noche y día como un buey*
*que el que vive de los otros,*
*que el que mata o el que cura*
*o esta fuera de la ley.*
​


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## I.C.

cuchuflete said:
			
		

> GenJen54 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> He was primarily shot on the right side of the face.
> 
> 
> 
> No surprise there. He would have preferred to shoot at the left, but lacking appropriate skills........
Click to expand...

Which would have been his left side from Cheney’s  point of view.


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## cuchuflete

As of an hour ago, there was a news report that Cheney's victim has a pellet lodged near his heart, and is in critical care.
Should he die, Cheney should be tried for manslaughter.

Now, what are the chances of that happening?


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## la reine victoria

cuchuflete said:
			
		

> As of an hour ago, there was a news report that Cheney's victim has a pellet lodged near his heart, and is in critical care.
> Should he die, Cheney should be tried for manslaughter.
> 
> Now, what are the chances of that happening?


 


In view of this news, I feel we should stop using all the 'funnies' which we've enjoyed posting.

Cuchu - 'Zero'.  The inquest would simply record 'accidental death'.

La Reine V


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## feuerbach

la reine victoria said:
			
		

> In view of this news, I feel we should stop using all the 'funnies' which we've enjoyed posting.
> La Reine V


 
Fair enough. Here's the last one. It's a title of an article... "Cheney Shooting Victim Deteriorates after Heart Attack, Cheney Donates Own Heart."


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## Brioche

cuchuflete said:
			
		

> As of an hour ago, there was a news report that Cheney's victim has a pellet lodged near his heart, and is in critical care.
> Should he die, Cheney should be tried for manslaughter.
> 
> Now, what are the chances of that happening?


 
There is nothing to indicate that it was anything more than an accident.

In Baton Rouge in 1992 a householder, Rodney Peairs, shot a Japanese exchange student, Yoshi Hattori.

The student (unarmed, naturally) had been invited to a Halloween party, and had gone to the wrong house. 

Peairs was charged with manslaughter and put on trial. 
The jury, apprently convinced that Peairs was well within his rights to blow away an inquiring teenager with a 44 magnum, deliberated for just over three hours before acquitting him.

So, following that example, I don't think Cheney's got much to worry about.


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## la reine victoria

Brioche said:
			
		

> There is nothing to indicate that it was anything more than an accident.
> 
> In Baton Rouge in 1992 a householder, Rodney Peairs, shot a Japanese exchange student, Yoshi Hattori.
> 
> The student (unarmed, naturally) had been invited to a Halloween party, and had gone to the wrong house.
> 
> Peairs was charged with manslaughter and put on trial.
> *The jury, apprently convinced that Peairs was well within his rights to blow away an inquiring teenager with a 44 magnum, deliberated for just over three hours before acquitting him*.
> 
> So, following that example, I don't think Cheney's got much to worry about.


 

What a dreadful conclusion by the jury.  A complete travesty of justice.  I thought the British judicial system was bad enough.  If I owned a gun (illegal in Britain, except for sports guns, which must be licenced) would I be within my rights to shoot a couple of Jehovah's Witnesses dead because they were enquiring, uninvited, about my religious beliefs?

What would the Baton Rouge judicial system make of that? 


La Reine V


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## cuchuflete

For what it's worth...


> A person* recklessly causes the death of another*, or acting under extreme emotional disturbance, causes the death of another, or acting under circumstances when a person reasonably believes the circumstances provide a legal justification or excuse for his conduct constitutes manslaughter.
> www.utcourts.gov/resources/glossary.htmUnlawful killing *without intent* to kill. It can be voluntary (such as a deadly fist fight) or involuntary (such as an accident caused by a speeding car).
> www.ncpress.com/LegalFiles/glossary.html


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## cuchuflete

Just in case you were wondering...



> People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals said it has sent a letter to the chairman of the Texas Parks and Wildlife Commission urging that Cheney's hunting license be revoked.



Texan justice?


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## feuerbach

I read this account in the Borowtiz Report. This changes my take on the incident. The Veep says he believed the shooting victim was Zawahiri. 

“I believed I had credible intelligence that al-Zawahiri had infiltrated my hunting party in disguise with the intent of spraying me with pellets,” Mr. Cheney told reporters. “Only after I shot Harry in the face and he shouted ‘Cheney, you bastard’ did I realize that this intelligence was faulty.”

http://politicalhumor.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?site=http://www.borowitzreport.com/archive%5Frpt.asp%3Frec=1320%26srch=


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## Roi Marphille

Hey guys, 
These are some of the jokes the American Talk Shows did about it. Some of them are very funny!:  

• "Good news, ladies and gentlemen, we have finally located weapons of mass destruction: It's Dick Cheney."
• "But here is the sad part — before the trip Donald Rumsfeld had denied the guy's request for body armor."
• "We can't get Bin Laden, but we nailed a 78-year-old attorney."
• "The guy who got gunned down, he is a Republican lawyer and a big Republican donor and fortunately the buck shot was deflected by wads of laundered cash. So he's fine. He took a little in the wallet."
• "Although it is beautiful here in California, the weather back East has been atrocious. There was so much snow in Washington, D.C., Dick Cheney accidentally shot a fat guy thinking it was a polar bear.
• "That's the big story over the weekend. ... Dick Cheney accidentally shot a fellow hunter, a 78-year-old lawyer. In fact, when people found out he shot a lawyer, his popularity is now at 92 percent."
• "I think Cheney is starting to lose it. After he shot the guy he screamed, 'Anyone else want to call domestic wire tapping illegal?'"
• "Dick Cheney is capitalizing on this for Valentine's Day. It's the new Dick Cheney cologne. It's called Duck!"
• "Vice President Dick Cheney accidentally shot a man during a quail hunt ... making 78-year-old Harry Whittington the first person shot by a sitting veep since Alexander Hamilton. Hamilton, of course, (was) shot in a duel with Aaron Burr over issues of honor, integrity and political maneuvering. Whittington? Mistaken for a bird."
• "Now, this story certainly has its humorous aspects. ... But it also raises a serious issue, one which I feel very strongly about. ... moms, dads, if you're watching right now, I can't emphasize this enough: Do not let your kids go on hunting trips with the vice president. I don't care what kind of lucrative contracts they're trying to land, or energy regulations they're trying to get lifted — it's just not worth it."
• "He is a lawyer and he got shot in the face. But he's a lawyer, he can use his other face. He'll be all right." 
• "You can understand why this lawyer fellow let his guard down, because if you're out hunting with a politician, you think, 'If I'm going to get it, it's going to be in the back.' " 
• "The big scandal apparently is that they didn't release the news for 18 hours. I don't think that's a scandal at all. I'm quite pleased about that. Finally there's a secret the vice president's office can keep." 
"Apparently the reason they didn't release the information right away is they said we had to get the facts right. That's never stopped them in the past."


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## cuchuflete

All jokes aside, what if W were to choke on another pretzel?

This brave hunter would bring the same judgment to using nuclear arms that he displays when using a shotgun.  That is frightening.


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