# Loss of a friend: Parla



## Cagey

Sadly, the member whom we knew here as "Parla" passed away August 2 in New York City from cancer.

In the six years she was a member, her 33,701 posts represented a generous contribution of her time and are a substantial addition to our forum.

We will miss her.

Cagey,
for the English Only moderating team.


*Added* Sunday Aug. 7: 
I communicated with Parla's family and sent them a link to this thread. They were pleased to know she was so well regarded in this forum and thank us for our condolences.


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## Loob

I'm very sorry to hear that, Cagey.

Thank you for telling us.

We will, indeed, miss her.

Loob


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## suzi br

Oh, how sad. 

Parla has been a steady influence in here.  Yes, indeed we will miss her. 


Suze


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## JamesM

I'm very sorry we've lost her.  She spent a lot of time and effort helping people with their questions.  At least her voice lives on in her helpful replies here.


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## JulianStuart

Thank you, Parla, we will miss you.


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## You little ripper!

I can't believe how upset I am! I enjoyed reading her posts; she had the ability to cut through the clutter and in a few words say what most of us needed a thesis to explain. Very sad!


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## sdgraham

I never met her in person, but we had an ongoing, scholarly, Internet relationship second to none. Every year, she chided my about how a nice city like Portland, Ore. could have an annual "Naked Bike Ride." (Not to mention a few other oddities we have out here.)

I don't know how old she was, but she often called me a "youngster" (I'm almost 77)

This forum has lost a treasure.


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## SwissPete

RIP, Parla. 
You were a great contributor. I am sure I am not the only one who will miss you.


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## Dale Texas

Wow, very sorry to hear this, but thanks for letting us know.  She was so concise and precise in her comments, and often came in and put a quick end to lengthy threads with a summing-up post.

One of the people I too would have enjoyed meeting in person, I'm sure.


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## jacdac

I am very sorry to hear that. Thank you Parla for your generosity and for touching the life of so many people in this forum. RIP awesome.


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## heypresto

I've been e-chatting with Parla for some years, swapping stories and chewing over stuff about the UK and US, making up riddles, and solving the Sunday Times crossword every week. 

I shall miss her terribly. 

As will the forum. She was indeed a diamond.


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## Dale Texas

Also, if at some point the moderators have the capability of forwarding some of these comments on to surviving family members if thought helpful, I give my permission to do so. 

Just a thought.


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## pob14

Very sorry to hear this.  I echo all the sentiments above.


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## RedwoodGrove

I had the greatest respect for her posts and considered Parla an authority. Most of all I looked forward to reading what she had to say. She will be missed. I am saddened.


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## Silver

Five years ago, when I first PMed you, you said "Silver, I can help you with your sentences, but you can send only 6 at most per day", and you'd been doing this for four years. 

You were always telling me that you were busy, but I didn't realize that you were getting older and older, weaker and weaker. I'm so grateful for what you've done for me throught those years, and I will never forget what you told me.

I just can't accept this and my tears are rolling off my face. No one understands you better here than I do, and you've gone.......

But I still remember what you taught me, and I have 5 big notebooks with all your notes, each time when I go over my notebook, it's like you are teaching me again.

Anyway, I'll go to the temple as a Buddhist as well as your friend.

Yours

Shuo


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## natkretep

I was mainly travelling in June. When I got into the Forum in July, it felt different. I soon realised that it was missing Parla's voice. That's how big an impact she made here!

Thank you, Parla, for your generosity. You will definitely be missed.


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## Irelia20150604

Very sorry to hear that. I'm at a loss for words...


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## zwxsnake

So sorry to hear this... Thank you, Parla, RIP...


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## nagariya

I am saddened to hear of this news. Parla ma'am, as I often referred to her was always concise and to the point. I always felt good to have my questions answered by her. I will surely miss her. Thank you, Parla ma'am.


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## Copyright

Parla joined WordReference on 23 September 2010, so she was part of my life for nearly six years – longer than many people I’ve known, and more constant and contributory in those years than most.

It is fairly obvious that there are far fewer members on the forum than guests, far fewer answerers than questioners, and fewer answerers still that move in and make themselves available and useful for such a long time. Parla was one of those few.

Despite her work as an author, editor and journalist, she found time to post an average of 15 posts a day for six years – and to adopt Silverobama.  (Post 15) You were fortunate, Silver, as you know. It’s a rare person who will offer that much help over that much time. Five filled notebooks is quite a legacy … and I believe the best legacy lies in what we pass on to others.

Like you, we were fortunate to have her New York knowledge and the wisdom of her years. She will be missed, but she will also be remembered and appreciated by anyone reading "previous threads" and finding her contributions.

Goodbye, Parla


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## You little ripper!

Dale Texas said:


> Also, if at some point the moderators have the capability of forwarding some of these comments on to surviving family members if thought helpful, I give my permission to do so.
> 
> Just a thought.


I think that's a great idea, Dale; it might help alleviate some of the pain they're feeling right now.


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## Hermione Golightly

I am so sorry to hear that we'll no longer hear Parla's voice but I am glad to have known her and learnt from her, through her posts which were always stylish, interesting and to the point.
It still amazes me how close we can feel to those we have never met in person, just got to know on-line. Parla was one of those friends who enriched my life.

I send my condolences to her family and friends on their loss.


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## shop-englishx

I'm very much saddened to hear this news; I cannot explain my pain in words.

I did get help from her by sending quite a few PMs to her, but the thing that I love the most is her reply:

"Sorry for the delay in replying, shop."

When you send a PM to a native speaker for help, you can hardly expect this sort of very generous reply. But, believe that that was only Parla who could be so good-natured and helpful.

Love you so much, Parla ma'am.


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## Glenfarclas

Terrible news.  Parla was among the most gentle but incisive contributors on the forum, one whose take on a question I always looked forward to reading to find out whether my own was reasonable or way off base.  Thanks to Cagey for being willing to become the bearer of bad news; a big but sadly belated thank-you to Parla.


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## azz

Thanks for sharing Cagey. This is really sad news, but we had to know. I will truly miss her. I can't believe it. I owe her a lot. So much. She replied to so many of my questions. And her answers were always so precise and so clear. I learned so much from her. She was really an asset here. She was so generous. So hard-working. So patient. A true teacher in the noblest sense. 

My condolences to her family and her friends and to everybody in Wordreference.


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## dermott

I can only echo the above. As Copyright says, her legacy will live on.


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## mink-shin

Thank you for letting us know this, Cagey.

I'd like to offer my condolences.


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## Franco-filly

Goodness, what a shock.  I thought the title of this thread meant it was being addressed to Parla, not about her.  I, like so many of you, cannot believe how upset I feel at this news.  I only hope her family know how much we all appreciated her contribution to the forum.


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## ewie

Terrible news ~ may she rest in peace.  Though I didn't generally agree with her 'political stance' on English, her posts were a pleasure to read: as others have said, she had a knack for cutting through the crap (including _my_ crap) in pithy style.  She will certainly be missed.


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## Englishmypassion

Heartbreaking news! RIP, @Parla ! You were such an exceptionally knowledgeable and phenomenal teacher and an incredibly nice person! I can now imagine how busy you must have been answering the PMs of so many members and posting publicly on the forum while doing your work, yet you regularly answered my PMs too with such incredible kindness. Even after being so knowledgeable, you were incredibly humble. It's the second (equally heartbreaking) loss for me in a fortnight (after my granny's death recently) and I find it really hard to believe that you will no more post to correct us in the forum and no more answer my PMs. So SAD!


I will always miss you too much, dear Parla! My heartfelt condolences to your grief-stricken family and friends.

But I will always keep learning from you by reading all those greatly enlightening posts of yours that I haven't read so far, as well as from those posts that I need to read at regular intervals to ensure that I remember your advice right. I'm sure the same is true of millions of other learners across the world. Thanks for letting us know that, Cagey.


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## Rover_KE

mink-shin said:


> Thank you for letting us know this, Cagey.
> 
> I'd like to offer my condolences.



So would I.

Such a sad loss.


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## passengerman

I'm sorry to hear that, she was a great teacher for us.


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## PaulQ

That is saddening news - a generous flow of clear explanations has come to an end. As was said of Wren,_ "Lector si monumentum requiris circumspice."_


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## Barque

I remember thinking to myself a few days ago that we hadn't seen much of Parla over the last month or so.

I'm very sorry to hear this.

She was a personality. Most of us knew her only in the context of this forum, never met her and don't even know her name but it still feels as if we have lost someone we knew personally.


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## keramus

Her kindness won't be forgotten.


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## cyberpedant

Goodbye, Parla. Sad to know that you'll never see this outpouring of well-deserved respect and affection.


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## Oleg68

I am crying


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## Allegro molto

Parla, I pay my deepest respect for the work you did in the Forum.
Your 33,701 posts are an outstanding achievement.

May you be in peace.


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## Andygc

I have little to add to the kind words already written. It was a pleasure having contact with Parla within and without the forum and I will miss her.


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## VicNicSor

Very sorrowful news... Rest in peace, Parla...


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## Miss Julie

Stunned and saddened by this news...I'm also at a loss for words.


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## WildWest

I had been away from the forum for two years. When I came back weeks ago, I noticed she was missing in threads. The Parla I knew would show up somewhere in the thread, and as the others said before, help us learners see things more clearly.

I was always used to seeing her in my threads. The last time we had a conversation was two years ago when I asked her for helping me find out my mistakes, and she explained it very well, as always.

No words can describe my sadness. May she rest in peace.


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## bennymix

I am greatly saddened.   My condolences to her family.   She was an insightful presence and reached out to many including me.
I had some email contact and found her feisty and friendly.    I will miss her a lot.
'bennymix'.


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## Teerex51

In my occasional forays into the EO forum I came across her posts a couple times but never engaged in a "conversation" with her.

Still, I'm very sorry she's gone.

Someone who devoted such a sizable portion of her time to the WRF deserves better words than mine, but there you have it. The weird thing with discussion boards is you make
 friends with—or simply get to respect—people who suddenly are not there anymore. They're gone, but they left a lot of their knowledge and personality behind and you can always go back and read their posts.
In a way, it's not unlike those favorite authors of yours who have died (man, do I have a long list of them), but you take comfort in the fact that their work will never die.


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## Morecoffee

As Copyright pointed out at post 20 "there are far fewer members on the forum than guests, far fewer answerers than questioners, and fewer answerers still that move in and make themselves available and useful for such a long time. Parla was one of those few."
I'm so grateful for what Parla had done for the forum, for us learners. Her generous help had been helping and motivating all the English learners on the forum and will still help us with her unbelieveable 33,701 posts. 
I still can't believe I won't hear voice on the forum any more. 
May she rest in peace!


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## AutumnOwl

Sorry to hear the sad news, I always enjoyed reading her posts, she had much knowledge and was always willing to share and help others.


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## duomoduomo

I'm very sorry to hear this. You were a great teacher. Thank you for your kindness, Parla.


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## Juhasz

Though I've not been here long, I've taken quickly to this community, perhaps most of all because this is a haven from the hostility that seems to be creeping into or dominating too much of life on- and offline.  Parla's exemplary kindness and patience made this rare, peaceful pocket of the Internet a nicer place - as I'm sure did her presence in the world at large.  It's sad to think that a voice is stilled, but it may get a bit louder out there.


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## srk

Her voice was very robust.  I would have thought she was indestructible.  I miss her.  RIP, Parla.


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## tittiugo

Never met her, but I join your feelings...


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## cool-jupiter

This is the saddest news I've had for the past few years. Thanks for every post you made, Parla. You took our breath away, and you have been a great help. You will be missed tremendously.


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## owlman5

Thank you, Cagey, for sharing the news even though it is bad.  This thread reminds me of how important it is to share our appreciation for others while they are still alive to hear it.


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## chamyto

I have already known the death of Parla, and it always affects our emotions. I did not know she suffered from cancer.


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## Silver

Hi, Cagey.

I forgot to say "thanks" to you. Thank you for letting me know this.

I am still feeling very bad these days; she's like a family member to me.

I wonder if it's okay to change her status as "Forever remembered" or something like that. I mean when she was last seen, not just a date.

By doing so, we might probably feel less hurtful and sad. Just a suggestion.

Thanks a lot


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## shop-englishx

I really really wish Cagey would delete this thread by just saying that ' .... my information was incorrect; Parla is alive, sorry for having been a trouble for the members.'


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## tagoot

Parla, I thank you for your contribution to date.
I learned a lot from you.
I am very sorry to hear the news.
Rest in peace.


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## morior_invictus

I'm very sorry to hear this. My deepest condolences to Parla's family and friends. 


owlman5 said:


> *[...]* how important it is to share our appreciation for others while they are still alive to hear it.




Farewell, Parla. . .
*#1*


Parla said:


> In this context, Copyright is correct; the meaning is "with it" or "in the know."
> 
> There are helpful online reference for American English usages that don't necessarily appear in older dictionaries; look for "slang dictionary" in search engines.
> *Parla, Sep 23, 2010*


*#33,703*


Parla said:


> "So you like this place? Anything in particular?"
> "Well, I was floored by the professionalism of the people."
> *Parla, May 26, 2016*


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## swift

I am heartbroken. Parla is one of the forum members I admire the most. I learnt so much from her contributions. May she rest in peace.


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## Hildy1

Very sad news. I have the greatest admiration for Parla's knowledge and for her generous contribution to the forum.


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## HSS

Parla was always so helpful, particularly when our queries concerned New York English but not limited to it; in fact, she was so helpful with any English question. I noticed Cagey's message just a moment ago. I've been traveling around. The sad news caught my eye while waiting for a train. I am sad, I am so sad I can't think of anything else at the moment. My heart goes out to her family.

Rest in peace, Parla.

I'm still waiting for the train on the platform with the head drooping ...

Hiro


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## taked4700

I must say, "Thank you, Parla."

May she rest in peace.

taked4700


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## takashi0930

I can't believe this. She's one of the most reliable people on this website. It's a great loss.
Please rest in peace, Parla. Thank you very much for your help.


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## lgr632525968

When I heard the news, I was totally shocked. I am terribly sorry to hear that. You had contributed to this forum a lot. We will miss you a lot. Goodbye Parla.


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## Egmont

I first got to know Parla here. She then invited me to play an online word game with her and about 15 others. We played for a few years, until she had to stop about two months ago, and corresponded about many other topics. This is a real loss - to her husband, to WRF, to all her friends outside WRF, to the world of science writers/editors, and beyond. I can't begin to be as helpful as she was here. Thanks for all you contributed, Parla. Rest in peace. We miss you.


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## irinet

*Tears will never be strong enough to take away what in sorrow we grieve for those lost... .

Now, an angel is watching over the dearest.

*​


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## mkellogg

That is sad news. I am thankful for all that Parla did for the forums, both for visitors and behind the scenes here.

Many people find old threads here through Google. Her comments, answers and commentary will continue to be useful for many hundreds of thousands of people around the world.

Mike


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## fiercediva

So may wonderful people have left us this year. I'm so sorry to hear that Parla was among them. I greatly enjoyed reading her answers and mourn for a fellow New Yorker.


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## Cagey

I added this to the opening post, but am posting it here as well, for people who are not likely to reread the opening post. 


*Added* Sunday Aug. 7: 
I have  communicated with Parla's family and sent them a link to this thread. They were pleased to know she was so well regarded in this forum and thank us for our condolences.


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## exgerman

Truly sorry to hear this. She was a level-headed commenter and we will all miss her and her comments.


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## EdisonBhola

I am very sorry to know about this. She had help me and many others on numerous occasions and she will be sorely missed by us.


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## gramman

As others have noted, Parla had a way of speaking that was *un*common, unusual in its precision, utility, patience, and benevolence. She sent me a PM once, commenting positively on one of my many stupid jokes. Those are the little things that bring a smile to my face.

We all mourn losing her, but should rejoice knowing how fortunate we are that she earned a place in our hearts, where she will remain forever. Death can never rob of us what's really important.


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## Glasguensis

I am sorry to hear this. She certainly contributed very generously to these forums.


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## Thomas Tompion

Very sad news.  Many thanks for letting us know, Cagey.  She will be much missed on the forum by a great many people.

My deepest condolences to her family.


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## JeSuisSnob

I am not a regular poster in English Only, but whenever I was down here I liked a lot to read her posts.

Rest in peace, Parla!


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## Rhye

Parla's posts were among my favorites to read, not in the least because they were so wonderfully pithy. She was, perhaps, the definitive American voice for the past 6 years. She will be greatly missed.


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## Holymaloney

I stumbled on this thread by chance and am so deeply saddened by this news. 
I don’t suppose we needed proof but reading this thread only confirms that in the end we are indeed a big family and it’s somehow comforting to know that in a computer world, seemingly devoid of any emotion, WR and its members remain human. I was moved by the words of my fellow foreroes and join them in remembering what a wonderful person Parla was. My heart and sympathy go out to her family, I am so, so sorry for your loss.


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## Mustermisstler

Thanks Parla for all your help throughout the years.
Wherever you are now, may you rest in peace.


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## Xavier da Silva

I've been thinking of posting a message here since I first saw the thread, but after reading the posts I noticed all good things had already been said. But there is still one that I'm sure I can always say to anybody, anywhere I am: Thank you!

Thank you very much, Parla!


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## jihoon

I'm so sad to hear that. I've been gotten so much help from her since I first joined this community. I can't say how much it meant to me. Thank you, Parla. Since I'm Korean and not very good at expressing how I feel in English, but I hope she has a good time in the sky.


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## Man_from_India

Parla, you will be remembered, I will miss you too. RIP. And thank you. 
Really sorry to hear that.


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## Packard

Parla,  February  19, 2016 –“Try the WR dictionary.”
Parla, November 10, 2010 – “The word is in the WR dictionary.”
September 23, 2014 – “Just look in a dictionary. The dictionary shows the proper divisions of words.”
Parla, August 29, 2014 – “The dictionary is wrong. Glenfarclas is right.”


Parla,

So who is going to tell us now when the dictionary is wrong? 

We’ll miss you.


Packard


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## jmichaelm

Parla was one of the posters who consistently stood out in my mind. I would make certain to read her answers whenever I found time to read the forum. So sorry to hear of this loss to us all.


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## grimbergen

I was so shocked to hear the sad news. She helped me by answering some of my questions. Also, by reviewing her replies to others, I have gained so much knowledge. I believe her wisdom and knowledge have impacted thousands of people around the world, and the number, as well as the impact, will just keep growing. I cannot be thankful enough for her and all the other forum members for volunteering their big help. I have not personally talked to her, but I feel like I have known her for quite long time. My heart and thoughts are with her family.


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## loverofenglish

I feel sorry to hear the sad news from Cagey. She help me very much with my learning English.
My condolences to her family.


You are always in my mind, Parla.


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## goldenband

I'm very sorry to read this sad news. Her contributions here made a real difference to a lot of people.


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## Gemmenita

My deepest condolences for the sad loss of our dear Parla, to her family, her friends here and to all foreros in WR.

She was so sweet and nice by responding to my questions in English Only.

She is always alive through her writings and her kindness.

May peace be upon her.


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## s.salehi9001

RIP Parla... I do not see you but I think very highly of you... Thank you for your generous helps...
I try to improve my English to be a contributer here like you ,if possible...
The whole world misses you


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## narumaru

So sorry to hear that. She helped me a lot in this forum and I really appreciate her help. 

I will miss her.


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## AntiScam

Sorry to hear about the loss of a very good member. She was very helpful. I miss her.
We are on a journey and it will come to en end.


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## Warped

May she rest in peace.


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## Calcutta Miss

I arrived here after Parla passed away, but I join to express my sympathy to Parla's loved ones and I grieve for such a devoted contributor.


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## MissHeidi

OMG . . This is so heartbreaking. May she rest in peace...


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## Hit Girl

I re-read all my previous threads because her ID looked familiar and I was sure she replied to my posts before.
Of course, she did.
I'm so saddened. 
Rest in peace, Parla.


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## shawnee

Adieu Parla. My condolences.


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## Wordsmyth

Parla could so often make one word do the work of ten. I'll miss that. I'll miss her.

Ws


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## merquiades

I am so saddened to read this terrible news.  Parla was one of the members I respected the most and felt an affinity for.  I would always scroll down to read her poignant comments.  We are so lucky to have them permanently here on the forum.  Requiescat In Pace, Parla.


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## Pedro y La Torre

I hope she did not suffer. Rest in peace.


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