# Bises / Bisous (lettre)



## Pastis

Hi,

Short question - if someone signs off in a letter with 'Bises' is this ok to say to a friend, or is it just used between people in love? . Merci


----------



## LV4-26

It's perfectly Ok to say to a friend. Generally between girls or between a girl and a boy. But rarely if at all between boys (unless they're brothers or father and son or members of the family or...artists).


----------



## Pastis

Merci,
I am a guy. A girl sent me the message with Bises at the end. Is there a possiblilty that she is being more than friendly? J'espere


----------



## LV4-26

Pastis said:
			
		

> Merci,
> I am a guy. A girl sent me the message with Bises at the end. Is there a possiblilty that she is being more than friendly? J'espere


It seems I had guessed right. 
Well, I'm afraid not. I don't mean it's impossible but there's no particular evidence to it.


----------



## adomi

Hi Pastis,

I'd rather say the possibility is that she was being nice.


----------



## Pastis

I can still dream. merci pour aider moi. I have a just started to learn French. much to learn, je pense, about women aussi.

Ah, I have received another message with 'bises ensoleillées' Is this also just being nice?, Merci, et pardon


----------



## Agnès E.

Yes, I'm afraid so... it's probably sunny today where she lives.


----------



## sophiecc

Bonjours, tout le monde,

Je voudrais savoir si "bises" peut s'ecrire "bisous"?

Le mot "bisous" existe?

merci d'avance


----------



## Shark

Le mot "bisou" (pluriel : bisous) existe, c'est une version plus familière ou plus enfantine de dire "bises". A la fin d'une lettre, "grosses bises" apparaît plutôt normal, "gros bisous" plus chaleureux, plus familier.


----------



## Catani

sophiecc, salut

Je me souviens de quelques lettres écrites pendant les années 70 par ma première correspondante française, à la fin desquelles elle écrivait souvent "smacks" (du franglais, bien sûr), ou bien "gros smacks".  Je ne sais pas si on l'écrit toujours[?]

Catani


----------



## hald

Je ne pense pas que ça s'écrive souvent, mais je pense que tout le monde le comprendrait.


----------



## sophiecc

Merci beacucoup!!


----------



## Spain_is_different

"Smack" est le bisou où les lèvres des amoureux entren en contact (sans langue). Donc ça dépend bien de la rélation que vous avez, quoi!!


----------



## desperately seeking l.

to make everything clear: bises for a friend, bisous for a lover, is that right?


----------



## nicko

no, it is not. You can use "bisou" for a friend and for a lover, and it is the same for "bise". The only difference is that "bise" is more familiar


----------



## geve

I'd rather say "bisou" is more colloquial than "bise"...

- "une bise" usually refers to a kiss on the cheek
- "un bisou" is a kiss (=> on the cheek, forehead, lips, neck... anywhere)
- "un smack" is a kiss on the lips _(this word is used mainly by teenagers -or at least, was when I was one !)_

and then there are slang words for lover's kiss (with the tongue) : une pelle, un patin...


----------



## nicko

Geve is right, I meant that "bisou" is more colloquial than "bise" ( I did not pay attention when I was writting).


----------



## Zhorg

"bisous" is more familiar than "bises"
"bises" > implies that you give a peck on the cheek whereas "bisous" could mean that you give a kiss on the mouth...


----------



## BMR

Bises = kisses
Bisous : is less formal, more familiar.


----------



## Agnès E.

PsychoKitty said:


> Can someone help me understad the difference between these? Many thanks!


As usual, it mostly depends on... context! Please help us help you: in what situation do you mean to get explanations? as letter ending? generally speaking about kisses? said to children, to the man you love?...


----------



## alephbeth

As far as I know, "bisous" is rather used for children. But it can be used as well by young (?) lovers who still behave and speak in a childish way, so Zhorg is right too.


----------



## kirkstead

Opening an old thread and maybe covering old ground. gros bis - exactly the same as bisous or more formal? Who would it be appropriate  to end a letter to with gros bis, is this reserved for just family or close friends? Is this an everyday french phrase, It looks like there is no English equivilant?


----------



## Cadfael

Hi! I realize there are posts on bisous/bises already, but for clarification, in closing an e-mail, might a particularly warm person use bisous rather than bises with anyone he/she just recently met, or only if he/she felt a particular fondness for the other person? I mean, could the writer just be a friendly person, or would the writer have to consider the recipient a friend to use the more familiar term? Thanks for any help.


----------



## xtrasystole

Cadfael said:


> might a particularly warm person use bisous rather than bises with anyone he/she just recently met   *No, he's not supposed to.* (And be careful with _'bises'_ too).
> 
> or only if he/she felt a particular fondness for the other person?  *Yes*


----------



## Suria

How well or how friendly does one have to be with someone to end a letter or an email with "bises?"  What is the English equivalent?  I would not want to be presumptuous or rude or give the wrong impression.  Thank you in advance for your help, which is always valuable.


----------



## Nil-the-Frogg

I would say you need to be rather intimate, but I know some friends who use it quite easily. I suppose it is equivalent to "Kisses", although I'm not used to letters in English and don't know how common it is. I've read it once, but maybe it was the one time in History it was used...


----------



## Suria

Thank you very much for your help.  I would be interested in hearing other opinions as well, as this is an issue that has been perplexing me for some time.  I have a correspondent who regularly ends emails to me with "bises."  If we were writing in English, I wouldn't end mine with "love."  Is the English love the equivalent of the French bises?


----------



## david314

The only phrase that I can think of which might be remotely similar is: *Love ya,*

-The use of the slang word _*ya* _gives it _a slightly less serious note_. To be safe, I would suggest *your friend *or perhaps,* affectionately*.


----------



## Syagrius

"Bises" is something friendly, especially coming from a woman.

One of my internet friends is a French woman. She always write "bises" at the end of her e-mails. It is OK, don't worry.

Hope it helps


----------



## mally pense

I would say (a little cautiously) that _an_ English equivalent would be 'x', as in the single character appended after your name. The good thing about this in English is that you can add (or take away) 'x's as the relationship develops (or falters!), e.g., usiing myself as an example, I might sign myself

Mally x
Mally xx
_or_
Mally xxx

or in a continuing conversation:

x
xx
_or _
xxx

However, it seems to me that the degree of friendship or closeness or even intimacy required to qualify for bises or grosses bises or biz or bisou or bisoux etc seems to be very variable. There really is no standard currency. In English I'm on xxx terms with someone who I can vouch I am absolutely not intimate with (not that I'd object), and similarly in French I have had 'bises' or 'biz' very early in the start of an email or messaging conversation with no implied intimacy.

By the way, the presenters on the radio station I listen to often end a phone-in call with "bye bye bisous bye", and I doubt there has been sufficient time in these cases to build the relationship into one of intimacy.

Mally x


----------



## lindasp62

Can someone please tell me the difference between these two "bises" -vs- "bisous" ?  If I write/say one or the other, what significance do they have?  Is one more appropriate for friends/family only, or someone romantic?  

Merci bien!


----------



## NemoNobody

bises" -vs- "bisous" : "bisous" is more childish ; however, both are colloquial.


----------



## Askar

Use "bisou" only if you're writing to a litlle child. It's sometime used by teenagers and even (rarely) between adults but to stay safe don't use it.

"Bises" is a common ending in letters or emails between close friends (boy/man to girl/woman; girl/woman to boy/man; girl/woman to girl/woman).

"Grosses bises" is often used in letters/poscards to family (grandparents; aunts/uncles..)

A mother writing to her dear son or daughter would probably use the more affectionate "je t'embrasse". 

To a woman/man you love, there's no better way to end a letter than with "je t'aime", but I guess it's obvious..


----------



## dancer66

hi, let me give a different view on the usage, and to complement Askar's post.

Here how I and a lot of (french) people use bises versus bisous:

I found interesting to order them by degree of closeness/intimacy between people (also depends on context - e.g. a big event could lead to a closer relationship and choice of words):

- bises: friendly, very friendly or love relationship (mainly between persons of different genders, or between girls/women), between family members. Plural, you rarely send only one kiss...   
you would rarely write "bises" to a person you very recently met unless you like taking risk, want to be overly explicit or already had enough intimacy...

- grosses bises: bigger/more kisses  

- bisous: between lovers or intimate (not lovers, but very close) friends, or with childs


All can be used between family members (depending on how close/intimate people are).
All are used in most age ranges, but bisous is less used by older generations (above 45y)
None imply that the sending person has love feelings, we can just identify the degree of intimacy a person feels/wants to have with the receiver.


If you just met someone you feel in love with, you'll start with bises, then move to grosses bises, then when love feelings have been or need to be expressed, use bisous.
I recently found that this type of equivalence may work:
- bises = xo
- grosses bises = between xo and xoxo  
- bisous = xoxo 

Smack/gros smack is used sometimes to replace bisous/gros bisous, it is more intimate/affectionate/loving


----------



## pitpop

I'm really surprised many of the posts here imply there is something wrong with man/man using bises to end letters or emails. I have a close friend that I have been though a lot of crazy experiences with. We both use this to end emails, and I also kiss him on each cheek when we part ways as is traditional in his culture. I would agree bisous would be between lovers or with children...


----------



## NemoNobody

pitpop said:


> I would agree bisous would be between lovers or with children...



"Bisous" is simply more childish, as lovers can be...

For instance "Care bears" are called "Bisounours" in French, which is a shorthand for "Bisous" and "Nounours" (teddy bear)...

It could hardly have been "Bisenours" : not childish enough...


----------

