# Society: SEXUAL EDUCATION - At school or at home?



## CrazyIvan

Dear fellows, 

     I think that sex education being necessary in modern education system is commonly agreed, however, How does it apply in your country? 

   Are teachers shy to speak in the class, in front of teenagers? What is the role of the public, including media and religion groups? How about the reaction of teenagers, do they really care what they are taught or do they tend to "seek their own adventure"?

   Thank you all for sharing


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## Don Borinqueno

I agree CrazyIvan. In my opinion it is necessary for children to take sex education classes everywhere.


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## Metztli

Hi! 

I agree with Don Borinqueno (Borinqueño?) it is necessary and very important to give sex education and all the information available to children and teenagers, for their own benefit.


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## CrazyIvan

In Taiwan, I guess we are quite similiar to other nations in Asia, teachers have difficulty to talk about sex in the classroom....so, we actually "make" our own sex education. Sharing information between friends and learning from other media are common.

There was a popular comic book in Taiwan talking about sex, and it did offer quite correct knowledge through those comic characters.


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## la reine victoria

I believe that sex education should begin at home, but I know that many parents are too inhibited to speak to their children on such an important matter. 

I was very fortunate in having a mother who prepared me, well in advance, for puberty and beyond. This was at a time when sex was considered a taboo subject.

Following her example, years later, I prepared my own two sons, I answered, in simple language, all their innocent childhood questions about where babies come from, how they are conceived and born. Later I gave them simple books to read and encouraged them to ask me about anything they weren't sure of. I don't really know how my husband dealt with them, that was 'man talk'. When they became sexually active they told me, without embarrassment, and I was able to offer them further important advice.

To get to the point about sex education at school. Mine was amazingly naive. In a biology lesson, a blushing spinster teacher told us how rabbits reproduced. She drew diagrams on the blackboard and then ended the lesson with a brief statement - 'The same thing happens with humans. This is not the sort of topic we should go around talking about!' Our mental image of a man mounting a woman like a rabbit was scary to those not in the know and highly amusing to those of us who knew the real facts.

Things have now changed enormously in schools. When my sons were at school (aged 10) they brought home a form requiring my consent to allow them to watch a graphic video of childbirth. They saw the video and found it both intersting and scary. They told me they were glad to be boys!

Over the years in the UK, sex education has become much more 'inclusive'. Older pupils now freely discuss with their teachers such topics as relationships, morality, homosexuality, lesbianism, masturbation, oral sex, contraception, and sexually transmitted diseases. Demonstrations on how to use a condom are given, using a banana  . Condoms are freely handed out to pupils in an effort to stem the alarming rate of teenage pregnancy (the highest in Europe) and the soaring rate of STDS.

There are also numerous family planning clinics (where young people are given advice on abortion) and 'drop-in centres' where sexual problems are openly discussed.

The media plays a large part too. There are many magazines, aimed at the teenage market, which give lots of sexual information and advice. One of these fortnightly magazines goes as far as giving detailed, illustrated facts on the 'position of the fortnight'. Very Kama Sutra. The alarming thing is that these magazines are eagerly read by 10 year old girls.

So no young person in today's Britain can claim to be ignorant of any aspect of sexuality. Tragically, when it comes to being sexually active, all their education seems to have been ineffective, hence the high rate of pregnancy, abortion and STDs. 

See here.

Some schools, in an effort to reduce pregnancy and STDs, are now emphasising the desirability of oral sex, using a condom, instead of intercourse.

These high pregnacy and STD rates happen mostly in the lower socio-economic groups. Many young girls deliberately get pregnant in order to obtain local authority accommodation, known as 'council houses'. They are heavily subsidised by the government, their rents are paid and they receive many financial benefits, giving them no incentive to work. It is quite commonplace for these girls to have several children by different fathers.

This trend recently prompted the Liberal Democrat Party to propose that full sex education in schools should be given to 5 year olds. Parental opposition was such that the proposal was dropped. The Liberal Democrats' argument was that since children are reaching puberty at a much younger age, they should be well prepared in advance.

Satisfying a 5 year old's curiosity about sexual matters is, in my opinion, something which should be dealt with at home. The 'daddy planted a seed in mummy' story is quite sufficient at this age.

I don't know how religious groups deal with this subject since I don't associate with them.  I imagine they would emphasise the need to 'remain pure' and 'to have self-respect'.


LRV


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## la reine victoria

Brioche said:
			
		

> From what you say, Your Majesty, sex education in UK has been spectacularly unsuccessful in reducing pregnancy or disease.
> 
> It's well known that behaviour which is rewarded is likely to be repeated, so if the state provides how-to lessons, condoms, abortions, accommodation and pensions, what do they expect?
> 
> I suppose the laws regarding the age of consent/ carnal knowledge/ statutory rape are not enforced in any way? Not much education there, eh?


 

Yes, Brioche, the figures speak for themselves. Maybe you can see how badly our country is governed.

It is a legal requirement that any person with a child must be housed for the sake of the child's welfare. This law applies equally to married couples with children who suddenly find themselves homeless, generally because they can no longer afford to pay the mortgage on their home and the property is repossessed by the lender. These families are usually put into bed and breakfast accommodation (one large room), in an hotel or guest house, until a council house becomes available.

The (false) ideal of sex education is that pupils will learn to practise 'safe sex'. As you say, behaviour which is rewarded is likely to be repeated - and it is. I feel that young people here are saturated with sex information, so much so that they feel almost obliged to give it a try.

16 is the legal age of consent for sex in the UK. Yet under 16s can go to their GP and are prescribed the contraceptive pill. 'Yes I realise you are only 14, and sexually active, so here's a prescription for 'the pill'. Remember to get your partner to wear a condom, though, there are some nasty diseases out there' are words spoken by GPs somewhere in the UK every day. Under the GP code of conduct, privacy clause, parents are not informed.

There is no law associated with 'carnal knowledge' as such, but any person accused of unlawful sex with an under 16 year old is accused of 'having unlawful carnal knowledge of a minor'. 

The law regarding rape is most certainly enforced but 'rape trials' are beset with difficulties.

I link the present sexual climate to the very poor general education system in the UK. Standards have fallen sharply, pupils are uninterested and their minds are non receptive. They seek out sexual partners to alleviate their boredom. They turn to drugs and alcohol as an 'escape'.

See this article on child prostitution in the UK. Yet more alarming news. 

We live in frightening times over here. It would seem that you have a similar problem in your own country.

LRV


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## lampiao

> How does it apply in your country?


Unfortunately, it does not. No gov.ment has had the courage or whatever they need to go forward with this.


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## Lancel0t

CrazyIvan said:
			
		

> In Taiwan, I guess we are quite similiar to other nations in Asia, teachers have difficulty to talk about sex in the classroom....so, we actually "make" our own sex education. Sharing information between friends and learning from other media are common.
> 
> There was a popular comic book in Taiwan talking about sex, and it did offer quite correct knowledge through those comic characters.


 
You are right about that... Here in our country we do have some sex education but it is limited. The topic is not discussed in details due to the fact that it might influence the students to try it out of curiousity. However due to the influence of media and the internet, many teenagers now here on our country are engaged in pre-marital sex.


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## cubaMania

CrazyIvan said:
			
		

> ...I think that sex education being necessary in modern education system is commonly agreed, however, How does it apply in your country?...


I would not make that assumption.  It's a more complex issue, and worth careful thought.
I would say that it is necessary to teach the BIOLOGY of sexuality, at an appropriate age, just as we teach any other scientific subject.
I also think we need to teach SAFETY to children, even very young ones.  That would include things like "Certain parts of our bodies are private.  Most people are nice, but there are some bad people.  Don't go with strangers that you and your parents do not know.  If anybody tries to touch you in private places be sure to tell your parents or somebody else you trust.  You do not have to obey adults if they ask you to do something you think is wrong."
But the issue of having the government teaching VALUES and CHOICES regarding sexuality is another matter entirely.  That leads us down a dangerous road.  I think those matters should be taught in the family, in religious institutions, and in other venues chosen by the parents.  Just remember--today the government may be run by people who agree with your sexual values, but next year it may be run by people who have a different set of values.  Do you really want to risk having your children taught sexual values by, oh, say born-again Christians? or for a more extreme example the Taliban? or whoever else might get into political power sometime in the future?  Not I. When it comes to values and choices, my parents taught me.  I teach my children.  My children will teach their children.


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## tvdxer

CrazyIvan said:
			
		

> Dear fellows,
> 
> I think that sex education being necessary in modern education system is commonly agreed, however, How does it apply in your country?
> 
> Are teachers shy to speak in the class, in front of teenagers? What is the role of the public, including media and religion groups? How about the reaction of teenagers, do they really care what they are taught or do they tend to "seek their own adventure"?
> 
> Thank you all for sharing


I personally would disagree that sex education is necessary in a modern education system, but as one who graduated from high school last spring and had a mandatory "health" (a.k.a. mostly sex education) class in his first semester of 10th grade (Fall 2002), I'll answer your questions.

We had one teacher teach the class, along with a student teacher.  Sex ed / health ed and physical education are closely connected in our school district, and I would imagine most others, so our teacher also did CPR and coached (American) football and hockey teams.  There was no shyness in his teaching, really, and even the student teacher didn't really seem to show any real nervousness.  As for the "role of the public", well, it's just a class, but interestingly we had to watch material from both Focus of the Family (a conservative Christian group) and Planned Parenthood (a very un-conservative birth control / abortion clinic group).  I don't think this was done to strike a balance, but rather was just the way it turned out.  Topics covered were abstinence, contraception, STDs, embroynic development / pregnancy, anatomy / cultural issues, and the like (but abortion was not spoken of).  They had us do silly worksheets and the like related to these things.

As for reaction, I would think most teenagers were already aware of STDs and the like.  They probably hadn't yet seen the graphic effects of them, however (we had to put some disgusting pictures in our Powerpoint presentations).  Many had already learned much of sex from our degenerate youth media, their friends / social groups, etc.

By the way, that was about my tenth grade sex ed class, the big one.  We also had a similar but much less extensive class in middle school, 8th grade I think, and the main thing that was covered was STDs, and in 7th grade we watched a video of a childbirth (the point?), both again if I remember correctly, and also one in middle school (4th grade), which didn't talk of sex itself at all but the physical / emotional changes that come with puberty and adolescence.  For that one they broke us up into two groups for an afternoon talk and video and gave us each a little pamphlet and deodorant stick samples (I'm not kidding).  It was called "Human Growth & Development".

As far as I know, parents can opt out for any of these things.


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## CrazyIvan

cubaMania said:
			
		

> I would not make that assumption. It's a more complex issue, and worth careful thought.


 
This is an interesting start of discussion, I guess I will start from here.

Yes, I agree with you that to assume sex eduaction should benecesarily provided by government is contestable. But I guess a "general understand of sex " and the "general attitude to respect others' body" is necessary to be taught in classroom. And this is quite close to what you say in your reply.

However, I believe we should present "choices" for the next generation. Let them understand different values, according to different religions, countries or ethnic groups. Then, you should have their choices freely. That is the reason why sex education should not be carried solely in the family or private institution like churches or temples, because it is easily biased since parents will only tell childern what they want them to know.

However, I believe either government or family take the sole role in sex education, or, any kind of education. They help each other and combine different points of views together, therefore, childern can be albe to receive a good education.....

Well, well, I really sounds like an idealist, am't I ?


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## CrazyIvan

Wow, tvdxer, thank you for your reply in details. 

I am wondering if I can do the conclusion as, most classes focus on "discovery of your own body" and "sex and its related diseases and troubles" rather than "sex and love" and "the emotional consequence you should notice"?

If we so focus on the "biological" part of sex, and then no wonder the teenagers cannot stop having sex, and having troubles.

Well, this is my explaination.

While you hear a theory in the class, usually you will like to do your own experiments. So, you find the opposite gender and "practice" it. However, given the lack of values, you actually have no idea why you are having sex, and believe that sex is only a "biological" things.

Then, get pregnant is no big deal, abortion is no big deal, even oral sex is no big deal. It is just an action, an experiment, a thing can bring people "sexual enjoyment."

I remember my Kiwi parents ( not true parents but homestay parents) told me one very important thing.

"Sex is a wonderful thing but you only do it with the one you love."

But I just do not hear this senetence, or this kind of value, has been notify in the classroom.


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## timebomb

CrazyIvan said:
			
		

> "Sex is a wonderful thing but you only do it with the one you love."



On the other hand, I would say this is one of the reasons why teenagers these days treat sex too casually.  They use love as an excuse.  Over in Singapore, just recently, there was an incident where a pair teenagers, both still in school, videotaped their lovemaking and stored it in a handphone.  The handphone was stolen and the video uploaded to the internet where thousands saw it.  I've not seen the video myself but besides normal sex, they say it also consists of oral and anal sex.  

I wonder if sex education is such a good thing after all.

In my days, there was no sex education in school.  We were an ignorant lot as far as sex was concerned but as teenagers, having sex with each other was unthinkable.  There were hardly any teenage pregnancies in my time but these days, it's common to read of teenagers having multiple sex partners and going for abortion.  

A little knowledge, they say, is a dangerous thing.  Sometimes, I think when sex and teenagers are concerned, that it may be better if they have no knowledge at all.  

Loh K L


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## la reine victoria

> Then, get pregnant is no big deal, abortion is no big deal


 

For many youngsters, getting pregnant is a big deal. They are terrified of what their parents will say, so they seek an abortion - which is a HUGE deal. No need for further details here, just that there are so many physical and emotional risks to be considered.

In spite of all the sex education youngsters receive, we have to remember that their hormones are working overtime. They rush into sexual activity out of desire and curiousity. Often, during the 'rush', caution is thrown to the wind and all lessons are forgotten.

See today's article in the Washington Post, which is relevant to the topic.



LRV


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## krimo

Concerning France, sex education is definitely not present enough.

Sex is still a taboo subject, and honestly, I don't think that the day where you will see a sex education class appear will come quickly. Unfortunately : I think that such kind of lessons would help to prevent some deviant behaviors (rapists etc). Of course it will not erase all the psychotics on earth but it would be an helpful way to refrain that sort of behaviors. Add to this that it will certainly make the "new comers" (speaking about sex, of course) feel more at ease with themselves, and with the others.
I mean, the youngsters have to understand that in a relationship, sex is important, but they have also to understand that a relationship does not consist only in sex.
But well, I think that we have to let the time do its job, i.e. soften the mentalities...


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## chucho

I live in Mérida, Yucatán, México. México has several cultures and points of view. It's still the catholic doctrine very strong in my state. There aren't a successful sex education in my country, because many people lives in a extreme poverty or in village where the catholic doctrine says "don't, don't & don't speak about sex"... This morning when I was going to my job I could see one pregnat girl, I think that she was 13 maybe 15 years old. Sometimes the government isn't guilty, but the tabu and the ignorance. The people in distant communities don't wanna go to buy a condon in the pharmacy because they can't have sex before the marriage according with the religious doctrine and because the community is small, everybody will know that you bought a 'satanic condom' jejejje...

There aren't a successful sex education but it doesn't mean that there aren't a sexual education. There are many advices, some free especialized centers and the school. I think that the tabu never gonna disappear but will be less than now.


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## luis masci

Here in Argentina, as in other undeveloped countries, there is not a serious plan in this field either. Here alike to Mexico, the Catholic Church has strong influence over the government, so spreading the way to get non pregnancy is rather reticent issue. 
What I can see is the following. Poverty women have got far more children. Here abortion is illegal so it’s not easy this issue, especially for poverty people. These children when they are grown usually repeat their parent’s behavior. 
As result, poor population is growing a lot and faster with all consequences this thing implicates.


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## jinti

I had a sex ed class about 20 years agoin high school.  It dealt with the basic "plumbing" (anatomy), but not with psychological issues surrounding sex.

We were divided up into boys and girls, and each class had a teacher of the same sex.  (Mine was my usual health teacher.)  My teacher wasn't embarrassed at all -- she had probably taught the same thing 100 times already-- but all us students were mortified.  I don't think anyone dared to ask a single question, or even to appear interested, because that would have meant a lot of teasing from other students later.

Years later, working in an urban university, we used to have "health fairs".  Representatives of different health-related programs would come with brochures or little items to give away.  Someone from an AIDS-prevention organization was always there, demonstrating on a banana how to use a condom properly to anyone who hesitated even a split second at that table and talking the whole time about "safer sex".  They never waited for anyone to ask them for anything because they knew most students were too embarrassed -- they just started talking.


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## CrazyIvan

Dear LRV, 

As you notified, the problem of U.K. sex education probably is giving students/kids too much information and let them "feel like" a try, without thinking of consequence. am I correct?

Actually, reading through this discussion thread, I found that the sex education has been more focus on biological side, but not psychological factors. What I mean psychological factor is, how to make kids feel comfortable to talk about sex, and make them understand this is an important part of life, has something to do with love and a creation of another new life. And take it seriously, but not just so  "easy-going" and just give it a try. (I guess in U.K. the rampant/outrageous flows of infomation create such atmosphere, right?)

I just felt contraception and prevention of disease should not be the main focus of sex education.

Plus, media.. I guess they are not really hand out "sex knowledge" but "positions" (knowledge and position sounds almost the same in my language ) So, that even makes "how to make people take sex seriously" is a more important part in sexual education.



> See here.


 
Is there anyone from the Netherlands tell us about thier sex education? since the Dutch government dealt with this quite successfully, according to this article.


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## CrazyIvan

timebomb said:
			
		

> On the other hand, I would say this is one of the reasons why teenagers these days treat sex too casually. They use love as an excuse. Over in Singapore, just recently, there was an incident where a pair teenagers, both still in school, videotaped their lovemaking and stored it in a handphone. The handphone was stolen and the video uploaded to the internet where thousands saw it. I've not seen the video myself but besides normal sex, they say it also consists of oral and anal sex.


 
I just found a discussion about this and just post here for others as reference. click here 

Timebomb, I believe your argument will be, no sex education at all will make this world a better place than having some/full extent of sex education?

Though I cannot offer you a thorough analysis of pros and cons of sex education, but for purpose of ease the population pressure on this planet and stop the epedemics, I do believe it helps.

The time is pushing us forward so we cannot just look backward and say, "hey, the old days are really nice", isn't it?


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## heidita

There was an enormous uproar on schools in Madrid because books were distributed in primary schools of sexual education with all kind of details on masturbation, gay preferences etc.

After outraged parents protested the book was taken out of circulation.

Was this the right step? Is it right to teach sexual education at school or should this be the parents' privilege or obligation?

I have included two links, sorry only Spanish, which show different points of view.

One is called "Estado masturbador" (masturbating government), whose position is quite explicit. 

The other link talks about not only the good or bad of the matter itself, but taking into account the immigrants of different culture and religion. What would have been the reaction of a muslim father reading about this in his 6 year-old daughters school-bag?

http://iglesia.libertaddigital.com/articulo.php/1276231670

http://www.libertaddigital.com/php3/opi_desa.php3?cpn=11666

*Mod Edit:  *This new thread has been merged with another on the same topic.


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## cuchuflete

Hi Heidita,
You left out the third, and probably most prevalent option: on the street.

I went to school when sex education was just barely beginning, and was addressed with great caution.  My parents taught me about reproduction at home....about a month or two after I had heard all about it from neighborhood friends.

The school instruction, clinically correct, but very limited, came about 4 years later.


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## heidita

This is true, the street way...

But do you think this is right? I wasn't even told about menstruating... 

I think children should be told about it somewhere and not learn it which may sometimes be _the hard way..._


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## cuchuflete

My parents erred in their scheduling, and not their presentation of the facts.  Many parents either don't know the facts, are too shy to present them to their children, or are not particularly articulate.  I think school is a fine place to teach this aspect of human biology, so long as it is done when the children are very young....in other words, before they hear whatever the street has to offer.  

Parents who prefer to do the teaching themselves can always do so before the school gets around to it.


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## tvdxer

Considering that they are _parents_, I'm sure they know the facts 

My dad gave me "the talk" at the ripemost age of 7, which looking back I think was a bit early.  There is a long story behind that, and it was a big moment for me; I still remember the exact date, and what happened before and after  .  It came for my brother and sister more around the age of 10-11, which I think is about right considering how ridiculously oversexed our culture is.

It is the parents' obligation to impart this knowledge to their own offspring, and those who fail to do so have done something wrong.


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## heidita

What about no sex at all? I read an interesting link on the topic which talks about abstinence  (as being the only way to stop aids). 

But I think this topic should also be included in the sex education. Nowadays it does seem a weird onlook, as the society is oversexed, as tvdxer says, but should one suggest this too, while talking to their children?

http://www.unav.es/cdb/unabstinencia.html


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## Bienvenidos

I definately think sex education should be taught in schools. My parents would have never told me about sex, or even had a conversation about it with me. I learned everything that I know from school, and as cuchu said, the streets. Their culture relies strictly on the "figure it out yourself" rule, thus they had to "figure it out themselves" once they got married. I also think what you learn from the street can sometimes be false information, and that learning about sex in school seperate the facts from the fallacies, myths, and rumors.


*Bien*


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## cuchuflete

How very naive!  





			
				tvdxer said:
			
		

> Considering that they are _parents_, I'm sure they know the facts


 Many became parents precisely because they didn't know, or had flawed knowledge.  Being a parent does not imply good knowledge of sexual biology.



> My dad gave me "the talk" at the ripemost age of 7, which looking back I think was a bit early. There is a long story behind that, and it was a big moment for me; I still remember the exact date, and what happened before and after  . It came for my brother and sister more around the age of 10-11, which I think is about right considering how ridiculously oversexed our culture is.
> 
> It is the parents' obligation to impart this knowledge to their own offspring, and those who fail to do so have done something wrong.



By 10-11, which is 'about right' for you, most kids have had the street version of sex education.  Ignorance until an ideal age does not constitue bliss.

Your last sentence is oh so holier than thou.  I'm glad I don't have to clear my parental actions with you, at the risk of having done something wrong if I fulfill my obligations other than as you see fit.  You may want to name your children after saints, and keep them ignorant about sex until age 11, but there are a multitude of other approaches.  I trust that most parents who have knowledge to impart are capable of making their own decisions, and to say they are wrong if they don't make the same one you propose is arrogant.


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## GenJen54

Here's a novel idea - how about home _*and*_ school? Why does this have to be an either/or proposition?

Let school cover the "biological" and scientific functions of it all, which parents can reinforce. Parents can add what they know from an emotional and personal stand point - and also reinforce their personal morals on the situation.

Or, there is another, rather novel approach that if I were a Social Worker or Psychologist, I might endeavor myself. How about "classes" in a private, professional setting? (No, I'm _*not*_ talking about specific one-on-one lessons.)

The best sex "education" I was ever a part of was when I belonged to a women's volunteer service group several years ago. One of our projects was working with young women who were at-risk of dropping out of school, working as mentors to provide positive reinforcement and support for them. 

We hosted a seminar entitled "Girl Talk," where a physician and his social worker wife came in and talked about female health, including sex. They spoke very frankly about biology, specific health problems related to women and men, sexually transmitted diseases, condom use, birth control and pregnancy, et. al. You name it, they broached that topic. 

At the end of the discussion, we hosted a Q&A. Girls wrote questions on bits of paper that were then put in a common basket and drawn out individually, so each question was "anonymous." 

The questions that were asked by girls as young as 12 and 13 - things I wasn't aware of until I was in college!    

The teachers and other administrators who were there with the girls said it was the best seminar they had ever attended. Frank, honest, funny and serious. 

If parents go to "baby classes" at hospitals, or people have to take "driving lessons" outside of school, why not sex education classes, too?


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## danielfranco

I remember having "sex education" classes back in Mexico when I was in 5th or 6th grade. Like many have said, by then we all have had been familiar (but not knowledgable) with the subject for a while, what with older kids at school and in the neighborhood imparting their wisdom sagely... I think my parents did try to talk about it some years later, but not very earnestly.
Still, as the parent of two pre-teens, I believe that the best sex education for children should be imparted at home. But not only out of your vast and profound personal experiences. I think you have to do your homework and find some visual aids (anatomical, please) and prepare your presentation even with more care than the presentations you prepare for work. You have to be very frank, and actually swallow some of your personal uncomfortable feelings about the situation, because it's for your own kid's benefit, really...
At school, they actually do try to teach the kids some of the anatomy along with lessons about consequences... When I reviewed the material they were going to use in my child's class, I was pleasantly surprised that part of their class is devoted to the benefits of abstinence.


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## Poetic Device

I was first talked to about sex by my parents.  The school that I went to did not talk about it until I was a freshman in high scfhool, and even then I was given if not poor then a bad education.  I was only taught how to put a condom on and them told that it was impossible to get AIDS.


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## User1001

CrazyIvan said:
			
		

> Dear fellows,
> 
> I think that sex education being necessary in modern education system is commonly agreed, however, How does it apply in your country?
> 
> Are teachers shy to speak in the class, in front of teenagers? What is the role of the public, including media and religion groups? How about the reaction of teenagers, do they really care what they are taught or do they tend to "seek their own adventure"?
> 
> Thank you all for sharing



I remember having a course two years ago on sexual education, and honestly, I feel more comfortable when people are discussing the topic, than I would've been before I took the class.

There are teachers that specifically study that topic, so discussing sex in a classroom of teenagers is as normal for them as discussing a TV show. I think everyone should be required to take a course on sexual education, because it does inform you of how you should go about preparing for sex, if you feel you are at a mature enough age.


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## Chaska Ñawi

It's a mandatory part of the curriculum from Grade 6 up in Ontario.  Some teachers teach the subject themselves, and others choose to bring in a public health nurse.  There advantages to both sides; the nurse is often much more aware of what's happening in the neighbourhood, and has the scientific base that many teachers completely lack; the teachers know the kids intimately (or should) and know how best to teach the topic.

Some kids react better when a stranger teaches the topic; others when it's their own teacher.

My co-teacher this last year was male.  We each taught a lesson from our gender's perspective to the entire class; and then did a final lesson, he with the boys and I with the girls.  The kids were initially really uncomfortable (although intensely interested); but I taught it the way I would a science lesson and my partner taught it the way he'd teach phys. ed., with a more personal approach to the final lesson, and they relaxed and handled it well.  

We had to approach the topic with care, because many of the parents at this particular school are quite fundamental in their religious views.  My angle, apart from the curriculum, was that it was just as important for the kids to be aware of their changing bodies and reproductive parts as it was to know why they cut their nails and brush their teeth.  They agreed, we went to work, and (somewhat to my surprise) we didn't hear from any parents.

In an ideal world they'd get the info from home and school, but we aren't there yet.


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## hohodicestu

Hi,

In Mexico the sexual education at school is not as complete as in the US.  Teachers barely cover the sexual topics in the text books. They sometimes just leave it out for homework.  I think that's one of the main reasons that teenagers get pregnant before graduation.  
I strongly think that Mexico needs to improve their sexual education at schools, create a better plan or text books and involving the parents in this matter.

saludos...


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## Poetic Device

I will agree to the proposition that GenJen stated earlier (education both at work and school) with one stipulation.  I would like to see a form being sent to the parents saying "this is what is going on, this is what we are going to talk about.  If you don't want your child to participate, then please return this form with your signature and we will substitue sex education with another program."  Does anyone think that is too harsh?


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## Chaska Ñawi

Here, it's an individual choice on the part of the teachers; some send warning letters home, others do not.  It depends on the parent community.  Technically speaking, we are not required to give any notice unless we are teaching something outside the scope of the curriculum.


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## panjabigator

Sexual education is a must.  I believe the earlier it is introduced, the less outlandish somethings will be.  I remember in kindergarten Gym (or maybe 1st grade), the kids would pick on each other calling the other kid gay (and I mean in the homosexual sense).  I had no clue what this meant and so I went home and asked my parents "what does gay mean?"  They uncomfortably replied "happy."  EHHHHHHHHH not the correct answer.  It ruined me for years to come in elementary school!  I learned a lot of things from vulgar talk on the playground, and so by the time sex ed came in 4th grade, some things weren't too much of a suprise.  I had the gist.  I never saw the girls video though, which was unfortunate because I wanted to know.   

I am not suggesting that one be told everything in kindergarten, but I think some information should be given.  I also think the anonymous question idea is a great great thing.


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## meltem

Doesn't really sex education exist in France?


			
				krimo said:
			
		

> Concerning France, sex education is definitely not present enough.
> 
> Sex is still a taboo subject, and honestly, I don't think that the day where you will see a sex education class appear will come quickly. Unfortunately : I think that such kind of lessons would help to prevent some deviant behaviors (rapists etc). Of course it will not erase all the psychotics on earth but it would be an helpful way to refrain that sort of behaviors. Add to this that it will certainly make the "new comers" (speaking about sex, of course) feel more at ease with themselves, and with the others.
> I mean, the youngsters have to understand that in a relationship, sex is important, but they have also to understand that a relationship does not consist only in sex.
> But well, I think that we have to let the time do its job, i.e. soften the mentalities...


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## Poetic Device

panjabigator said:
			
		

> Sexual education is a must. I believe the earlier it is introduced, the less outlandish somethings will be. I remember in kindergarten Gym (or maybe 1st grade), the kids would pick on each other calling the other kid gay (and I mean in the homosexual sense). I had no clue what this meant and so I went home and asked my parents "what does gay mean?" They uncomfortably replied "happy." EHHHHHHHHH not the correct answer. It ruined me for years to come in elementary school! I learned a lot of things from vulgar talk on the playground, and so by the time sex ed came in 4th grade, some things weren't too much of a suprise. I had the gist. I never saw the girls video though, which was unfortunate because I wanted to know.
> 
> I am not suggesting that one be told everything in kindergarten, but I think some information should be given. I also think the anonymous question idea is a great great thing.


 
So what age would be good?  See, to me I think that it all depends on the child.  I don't think that you can group them all like that....


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## maxiogee

Poetic Device said:
			
		

> So what age would be good?  See, to me I think that it all depends on the child.  I don't think that you can group them all like that....



That can be said of any school subject.
Some children "take to" certain subjects earlier than others.
This is a fault of the education-by-age principle and not one society seems to be in a hurry to rectify. Children (in all countries) get "left behind" as they fail to grasp a point vital to their progress. Their lack of comprehension of this inevitably means that they miss the next point, and so on.
To teach children according to their abilities is probably beyond the abilities of our current school systems. And I'm certain it is beyond the will of our legislators and parents.


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## Poetic Device

Kids are being left back? Is this in Ireland? If so, watch out, Tony! I'm moving to your neck of the woods!!!  (More times than not children are never left back in the U.S.A., not even if they desperately need it.  )


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## Fernando

My opinion is quite the same as Cubamania (page 1): Biology is OK and should be an obligatory matter. Values are not. It should be the parents who teach (or do not teach = society will do) what the children should do or should do not.

Teaching that getting pregnant at 14 or being promiscous at an early age is bad is something I think is shared values and could be taught. A basic knowledge of non-abortive anti-conceptive methods is also Ok to me.

Unluckily, knowledge does not mean responsability. Pregnancy, Sexual deseases (STD?) and abortions between pregnants is commonplace among teens that talk all day about condoms and have been taught about.


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## maxiogee

You mis-read me. I say they are "left behind" - not "kept behind". They stay in the same cohort and progress through the system eventually leaving school and increasing our astonishing level of functional illiteracy —> it is reckned we have 500,000 people with literacy problems.


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## Poetic Device

But I already packed my bags...  lol


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